Other Craptions

If they start singing about free credit reports, kill them.

Everybody laughed until the torpedoes started firing.

It's cute when Canada sends relief for the oil spill crisis.

"Whale Wars" is getting fucking stupid now

ain't a damn thing funny about alzheimers

At a top speed of 2 mph, many questioned the actual need for helmets.

It's not easy to piss off the Coast Guard and PETA at the same time...

Senior Whale Jousting: inhumane? Possibly. Glorious? Quite.

Pimp My Willy

Captain Ahab's anger management classes seem to be going well.

"I swear to God, tomorrow I'm carpooling with somebody else."

"Let's see them try to keep us out of the Yacht Club now!!!"

They really are running out of ideas for pokemon.

"So, Jerry. Are you positive those drugs we took in the 60s had no long term effects?"

I thought MY Bucket List was messed up...

PETA's latest attempt to infiltrate Sea World was less than successful.

A whale of a time! (I hate myself)

Right now, somewhere out of frame, are two women saying "That's not my husband."

It will go 4 nautical miles for every quart of our dignity we put in it.

The Bluefish Brothers... They're on a mission from Cod...

It's harsh enough that they murdered and turned the whale into a vehicle and flaunt it around, but they crossed a line by pinning her babies on their helmets.

Pedal faster Bernie! The guy we hit just surfaced!

We're gonna need a bigger hit of acid...

As punishment for killing her trainer Tilikum was sentenced to to 200 hrs of community service ferrying senior citizens at the duck park.

HEY!!! You guys are scaring away all the fish!!! And women...

Of course it's green. It runs on whale oil.

"Do you think they'll ever find out what we do with the extra whale-research money?" "Naahhh..."

His left blinker has been on since he left the dock.

I hope the blowhole is for display purposes only...

Not quite how I remember my '72 Plymouth Baracuda...

Because swan boats are for pussies.

"Duuuuude -- what a killer ride!"

I hope they didn't build this thing on porpoise!

Those Somali pirates are actually a lot less threatening than they're made out to be.

"Just wait--when we get to Japan, we will be hailed as GODS."

It's nice to see Bob Marley's band still touring.

I sweer to god gGrald if you tell me we're having a whale of a time once more I'm going to castrate you on the paddle wheel.

Team Rocket and their crazy schemes.

Since the latest incident, Sea World has tried to discreetly switch to animatronics. No one is convinced.

Old Man River and his protegee, Chad.

Moby Dork

...release the Kraken.

They started pedaling 26 years ago not realizing that neither one could swim.

Why do these people not fear us, the mighty black horsemen of the Apocalypse? Did they mistranslate the scriptures?

"Why yes, my willy IS free"

No BP, no. This is not going to help.

This new "Jonah and the whale" movie is a little more low-budget than I expected.

JAWS PART 26

Wow, these guys have waaay too much time on their hands. Err, actually...no, they probably don't.