Other Craptions

"I said I WOULDN'T have sex with you even if you wore a full body condom filled with hand sanitizer."

Aquaman finally figured out a way to fight those pesky land-based villians...

Oh sure, the water suit looks ridiculous and is totally impractical, but call it the i-Suit and it will sell millions...

Mr. Freeze: De-frosted

When he uses filthy language, his parents mix him with soap.

X-Men Origins: Ice-Man looks pretty lame to me.

The only thing it doesn't protect against is the mocking ridicule of children

After starring in one episode of Spongebob, Bubble Buddy's career took a less kid-friendly direction.

"H2O Boy" was the city's greatest hero until he had a run-in with his greatest nemesis, "Opened Box of Blue Jell-O"

Rumor has it The H20Boy II will be "ribbed for her pleasure."

The Justin Bieber containment suit is still in the experimental phase, but once it's completed the world will be a much, much better place.

"I replaced my whole body with silicon, and now I feel like a boob."

Recommended beachwear from Louisiana to Florida.

Even amoebas are obese in America.

watching jimmy try to park that thing, is always the highlight of his coworkers' day

Is this the diving suit for exhibitionists?

This is how Aqua Man's parents gave him a time out. The mockery of the license plate only added to his humiliation.

WOW! a Self Contained Humiliation Apparatus I

I guess cannibals prefer their lunches bagged these days.

Adam Sandler's career just keeps getting sadder and sadder.

After the ban on Water-boarding, the CIA had to be more creative.

After all these years NASA has decided that this is really all you need to get to the moon.

Pampers ups the ante

i'm not fooled, eHarmony! That's no woman!

California, huh? Not surprising at all.

"Sure, I look silly. But if you're gonna fuck Paris Hilton, a man's gotta do whatta man's gotta do."

"Is that nail guy gone yet?"

Stephen Hawking likes to go swimming once in a while.

Oh, sure, there are a few side effects, but my Restless Leg Syndrome is almost completely gone.

Try as they might, The Justice League could never find a job for H20Boy.

Fill it with beer and it's another typical Friday night in Dublin.

With this Gulf residents can once again experience what it's like to be in the ocean without the horrible mutation or flesh-cravings.

"I will *NOT* let my bladder control problems stop me!"

"... I don't think you're ready to see H20BoyII."

He donated his body to science...fiction.

I'm sorry, the card says 'Moops.'

From a distance, the new Sealy waterbed mattresses are friggin' creepy!

After H20BOY 2 successfully walked on the bottom of the Mariana Trench, poor H20BOY 1 was sold in a garage sale.

...and THIS is how you CAPTURE an invisible man.

Ahhh...the water's meant to be o the OUT side.

After the lynching mob left, they left H20 Boy's body as a warning to the other water people.

Can YOU guess where the tap is?

Illegally parked in a dry county.

On second thought, It probably would've been easier to just learn how to swim...

I told him a liquid diet was a bad idea.

James Cameron had to admit he had never seen the first one during his pitch for Waterboy2

Anybody want to take a Bath-O-Sphere?

Ironically, this circus performer is made entirely from the tears of other circus performers.

I see BP is still hard at work finding ideas to stop the spill.