Other Craptions

This didn't help the Baldman sell much chocolate, but the lotion store next door sold out by noon.

5 minutes earlier, some guy sprayed those bars with Axe.

When she told me her show was opening on Broadway, I didn't think she meant right on the frigging sidewalk!

They're already taking numbers to see who sniffs the poles first when the women are done

Eight years of gymnastic training for this?

Part of the Obama stimulus package calls for placing scaffolding on major city shopping areas. It won't help the economy, but a lot of people will be stimulated.

Erector Set!

Vote yes on outdoor stripping patios

I've been trying to pick up chicks at regular bars, but they're much easier at the monkeybars.

Don't fall for it! It's a trap!

A Cuntree!

There was a 20-car pileup in midtown today...

The Bald Man eventually had to build a barrier in front of his chocolate shop to keep premenstrual women from ransacking the place.

The Britney Spears College, Est. 2008.

The slut trap is working well beyond Edgar's wildest expectations.

This scaffold is as easy to reach the top of as the corporate ladder is for these women.

Scaffold poles are ferocious hunters, snatching their prey off the sidewalk... sometimes by the snatch.

You should've seen the construction workers' faces when I told them what happened while they were on break.

Bill Clinton's home security system

Honey, why were you 6 hours late coming home from work?

Wow, it's the Federal Witness Seduction Program.

The Bald Man knows how to advertise.

The video shoot for Britney Spears' next video or Hooker Row in Amsterdam. Your call.

They're combating emissions alright, just not greenhouse gas ones.

One day, my boss is gonna find me with my pants down around my ankles, and it's going to be all your fault, Cracked.... all your fault...

And to think that I saw it on Mulberry Street . . .

If this isn't entrapment, what is?

I love everybody who could not be more bored by the hot girls gyrating on poles. Or, as they call it in New York, Wednesday.

Can you spot the gay man?

After School Specials are sure different now than when I was a kid...

Strippers in New Orleans prepare for the next levee failure.

fingers crossed the 'man' isn't the only bald thing here...

All this needs is a "caution: Wet" sign in the scene and it will be complete.

He may be a bald man, but he is a happy bald man.

I would just like to point out that none of these strippers are wearing the proper safety gear for working on scaffolding.

I want to have sex with them because I'm in love with their personalities.

The prison warden just couldn't figure out why he kept losing his female inmates.

The opening scene to a construction worker's wet dream.

Is Bill Clinton running again?

When a girl wants chocolate, a giant metal fence made of scaffolding will not stop her.

They're building a new complex to house my erection.

"The U.S. Gym-Nasty Team has practiced four long years for this moment, Jim. You can just FEEL the tension. They know they'll be graded on difficulty, showmanship, and especially on whether all the guys get simultaneous boners."

Dear Penthouse Magazine...

Yeah, well if that was the name of your candy store you'd do the same thing to prove to your customers you don't like little boys

I object to the blatent commercialization of whatever this is.

The mayor was willing to do whatever it took to get the construction workers to end their strike.

Construction Workers Gone Wild.

why couldn't the photographer have been just a foot shorter dammit?

Baldy, I gotta hand it to ya, this is your best advertising campaign yet.