Other Craptions

Reservoir Hound Dogs

Why couldn't the man who finally figured out how to clone humans have been a huge Jessica Alba fan instead?

Thank YOU very much! No, thank YOU very much! No, thank YOU very much! No, thank YOU very much! No, thank YOU very much! No, thank YOU very much! No, thank YOU very much! No, thank YOU very much! No, thank YOU very much! No, thank YOU very much!

The King and the King and the King and the King and the King and the King and I.

I wish this would stay in Vegas

No on expects the Elvish inquisition!

The building has left Elvis.

….and I will use this Clone Army to crush the rebel scum

Peanut butter, marshmallow fluff white bread and banana stocks rose unexpectedly today..

Dis-GraceLand.

Some day laborers will go to extreme lenghths to prove they're not illegal immigrants...

Kim Jong Il's new fashion mandate did not sit well with a majority of North Koreans.

It could be worse. They could all be Adam Lambert impersonators.

The police caught the cocaine dealer by a quite an obvious means.

Your department store Santa....during the off season.

Just one of the things Nic Cage wasted his money on was an all Elvis-and-Priscilla entourage to tell him how cool he was.

1 out of 5 Elvis impersonators will always tell you which way to the beach.

The plot for 'Ocean's Fourteen' is more ludicrous than the other three combined.

"And on the fifth day God created the creatures of the sea, and birds to fly across the heavens...and Elvises, a whole shitload of Elvises."

Part of the Obama administration's Elvis-nomic stimulus package includes money to hire out-of-work Elvis impersonators to teach inner city nerds how to be cool.

The LARPing brochure told them to dress up as "elves." We really have a literacy problem in this country.

Not a jail nor stage could hold them.

Thanks to extensive use of hairspray, total global warming just increased 150%

3000 Miles from Dignity.

On their way top rumble with Drag Queen Dolly Parton impersonators from down the strip.

Bet you can't guess which one is evil.

They couldn't just stop at cloning a sheep, could they?

According to Elvis biographer Albert Goldman, Elvis liked his girls to wear white panties. So, girls, let's hike up those dresses and see how authentic you are.

"Oh shit COPS! They saw us rob that Costume shop!"

With all the hairspray in that group, I hope they stay well away from open flames.

And yet they laugh at me when I swear my Elvis sighting was for real!

"Here we see a Swivel of Elvi in their natural habitat. Elvi usually travel in large schools to confuse predators, and can be found crying . . . in the ghetto."

What happens in Vegas usually involves a crowd like this.

Frank Sinatra would kick all their asses and be back in his grave by dinner time

I see the Grateful Dead are on tour again.

How'd my wedding photos get out?

Elvis unimPresley

Vivaaaaaaaaaaa Lost Elvis!

"I heard Black Elvis was THIS long."

They are all lonesome tonight. Well it was like that last night too, and the one before, and the one before...

When you throw his ring into the fire, and then hold it up to the light, you'll see an inscription written in Tennessee Hillbilly.

The Elvis re-enactment society mostly just talks about drugs, sings half-remembered songs to "groupies", and gathers to eat a lot of food. Sometimes they march.

Are you sure there's a blue suede shoe store here?

Sofa King awsome

Dudes. Stay away from my harem. Thank you very much!

"...And this week, the polyester industry posted its first real profits since 1979..."

were gonna need more toilets

Sir, isn't the strip mall closed for demolition today? --I'm doing humanity a service, son.

Hey baby, if you got peanut butter, I got the banana