Other Craptions

... and to this day, Roosevelt’s balls reside in a modern art museum.

Always wear a size too small to accentuate your natural curves.

Dolly Parton v2.0

The "Mapquest" joke won yesterday?? My colon polyps make me laugh more than that shit.

People criticize, but it's STILL a better babysitter than TV.

George Jetson's extramarital fling.

How anorexics see themselves.

Mrs. Doubtfire screwed Millenium Man, and here is their offspring.

The famous composer, Yo-Yo Ma

Mrs. Doubtful.

The original design for the I-Girlfriend was scrapped due to it's strong desire to have a child.

How to win the CRAPTION contest: 1) When you see a CRAPTION winner on the street, drop a nickel in his cup, 2) Go home and have sex with your girlfriend (he doesn't have one) 3) You win.

Fag McMuffin

Forget the robot, what the HELL is all that stuff in its reflection?

If Johnny 5 knocked up Kirstie Alley.

Ho-Yo.

Weeee!!!

Cool, Billy Mays came back as a knife sharpener.

Dakota Fanning is nearly unrecognizable these days.

November 12 at 2:00PM Central Standard Time, J-Lo's ass gained sentience.

Testicleese had some real balls but would only pick fights with children.

I call it, "Two Metallic Buns in Search of a Furry Burger."

I can't even FIND your shiny metal ass!

Ironically the artist calls it "Patty."

remember the silver surfers little bout with asphyxiation about a week or 2 ago? yeah...he got bored quick.

Whatever the fuck it is, I know my tax dollars paid for it. Dammit.

One of Andy Warhol's later works entitled "Sweater Stretched Over Robot Testicles, Plus Some Sneakers"

Silver Surfer on Mickey Ds.

The Yo-Yo people from the sweater nebula came to learn about our valuable earth ropes. They need them to walk their dogs.

fuck im 0.325 seconds late!!

So... sweater, but no pants?

hi mom!

Throw in a 50 foot belt around her waist and you've got one helluva yo-yo.

WTF, is every cracked reader a Roosevelt historian or what?

Shut up. I really like Jiffy-Pop.

I've been slowly poisoning my wife with mercury, and the bitch still won't die.

The statue reads: "It's water weight you bastard!"

Somehow I don't think, when it hatches, it'll be a pink Cadillac.

Fuck it. I am just not funny today. And neither are any of you.

"Hey kid, can I borrow those red pants? You got a diaper on, don't you? I got nothing. Come on, help me out here, people are staring..."

Even Art Snobs agree...this is rediculous

That's uncanny, it looks just like my ex-wife.

So, at 12:10 I sit to write a craption.. then I see that "Weeee!!!" has 12 votes. How am I to compete with that?

Love The Hour-Glass Figure...

Taking the "hourglass figure" to an unhealthy extreme

What the fuck is this?

Superman as a baby, meeting his balls for the first time.

So THAT'S where I left my ben wah balls.

Hey, as long as she's little in the middle.