imTKA
So how's your chimney this morning? And by that i mean your female reproductive organ
Kamikaze Phoenix
How many flies did they give you? Yeah I only got two also. Fuck this neighborhood. Let's try somewhere else next year.
gypsy61
No we don't need any more candy, we need tpo speak to your leaders about an asteroid that's headed, no more candy, what is wrong with your species!!!
stodavr
Kiss these frogs, and they turn into overweight twenty-five-year-olds who lives in basements.
Ceveron
Kermit was not embarassed to date a pig, it was just the whole "introducing her to the family" part
itoldyouso
ATTENTION KIDS! If your mother makes your Halloween costumes, MAKE SURE SHE IS NOT ON CRACK!!!
Mothra24
The frog legs were hung by the chimney with care in hopes that Saint Patrick soon would be there? WTF?
Delph
Little girl, did the people who stole your candy have any distinguishing features?
SRLivewire
"Hey Mom, these costumes you made are great. Why don't you sew together a giant silver balloon and let it fly away, and then tell everyone that I'm in it!"
savinator
When we crawled out of the muck onto dry land billions of years ago, I just, I dunno, expected better.
rockymcrock
As the mixed race son of a frog mother and human father I find this sick parade offensive and racist.
angst9ine
Fuck i hope they are permanently stuck. They've already been kissed and this is the result!
geniuswaitress
When Rick James sang "she's a brick house," few knew he meant an underage girl in a frog costume.
bcanders
You know when you drive to a small town, and they say "You don't want to go camping by that farm" or whatever. This is why.
Blinker_Fluid
Even though their costumes are retarded I'll give them a treat. And then I'll sic my dogs on them.
Blinker_Fluid
The French finally had enough of the "Five minutes later France surrendered" craption.
Mr.Excalibur
Golly Billy, you were right! This is a TERRIFIC way to look like complete morons!
Ceveron
I always hoped they would make a parade to honor the benefits of eating Jack n' the box
Vivaengland
The only day that i sit at my computer waiting for three o'clock, and Cracked gives me this shit.
Kamikaze Phoenix
The people in the background had declined to kiss them, even for a basket full of money. Their search would have to continue.
Smithereen
"Just kiss the frog!", they said. "What's the worst that could happen?", they said.
Unsaturated15
"Sigh... It's not easy being green." "Shut up, Fred. You're a human from New Jersey."
spectre_vampire
That's France in a nutshell: frog legs...um, pooping in chimneys, and...running away from things.
RogersIB
"Urban legend my green ass! These Las Alamos humans really do give out free fly bait."
QuickWit
This is why you don't wait until the last minute to buy your Halloween costume.
geniuswaitress
Somebody must have scared these kids, because they all literally shit bricks.
slickjamesjik
I can't find a chimney sweeper willing to clean out a family of frog's worth of shit.
Backinblack
Sorry we're late, but we're looking for a gimp riding backwards on a motorcycle...
spud
In Denmark, Hans Christian Anderson's birthday is traditionally celebrated with a ritual crapping in an old well and stealing egg's from a neighbor's henhouse.
JewDude
It certainly had a wide celebrity...but I was aware that it was only the frog that was celebrated. It wasn't I. - Mark Twain
testpattern
Burger King announces the new Brick oven frog's leg pizza sandwich! Make sure you order the combo!
Zangetsu
Maybe it's just me, but I don't sense even the tinyest bit of humour in the current top craptions...
Mr.Excalibur
Oh for the love of Pete! They gave us candy too! We're FROGS DAMMIT! We want FLIES! GAWD...people are STUPID!
Kamikaze Phoenix
If I was a poison dart frog, I would never have let that guy call me a fag and live...
Backinblack
When up on the roof top, what should appear? But 4 mutant frog princes.... Honey, get the shotgun fast!!!
Bluedevil8244
Can you believe we're the only ones in town wearing these sweet-ass costumes?
1.21jigawatt
"I've heard that if a frog sits in water, and very slowly, the water is heated to boiling the Frog will also get boiled. " ..."Maybe, let's talk it over when we get to the Spa."
RogersIB
"One candy corn! We won't go to that house again, those Jews are just snakes in disguise."
Radu
After it was revealed that Santa Claus was not afraid of amphibian royalty, these guys were down on their luck.
jbirchfield1
Well, I'll be spending the rest of my day banging my head against a wall trying to get amnesia, because this is a pic I don't want to remember.
jbirchfield1
"So you're SURE you advertised this parade?, I just figured there'd be more people"
jbirchfield1
"DAMMIT JIM!!! I told you there aren'y any flies around this time of year. And for the record chimney, DO NOT float down the street like a lilly pad!!!!"
GhostfaceUrkel
There's no easier way to masturbate in public but no longer any reason to.
RogersIB
" I was talking about the Commodore's song Brick House, not a commode brick house!"
cloudy_girl6
"Daddy daddy what are they supposed to be?" "The losing end of a bet I'm afraid,"
RogersIB
"I thought that gecko would never stop yapping about flood insurance. Well mate, ya live in a flood zone says he. YES, yes I do, says I, that's kind of the point of living on a lily pad!"
Rhymenstein
It's not easy being green, and shitting down chimneys... that's no picnic either!
catwomanswrath
You can tell what that little girl in the back is going to be next Halloween!
arifat81
"Teenage Mutant Chimney Dumpers" sucks. It isn't funny whatsoever. Vote for some of the runner-ups.
Shane?
Kiss me and I'll turn into a prince. Kiss my ass and we'll have a castle to live in!
patjk73
Moments later a big Italian plumber in red coveralls, crushed them all to death.
Wai0001
God thought simply plaguing the Egyptions with frogs would not suffice. No, it would be much, much worse...
dweez
The director of the Super Mario Bros. movie clearly had the wrong kind of "Toad Stool" in mind.
SRLivewire
Halloween is the one day that REAL ALIENS can walk aroun in their natural state.
noreport
I hope they wont trick or treat that trailer in the field...I say that because it looks like a pedophile would live there + they are kids + I have no point.
getittwistd
...and then he says, "I think I have genital warts". Fucking toads, I guess that's what I get for slummin'.
mrmcduff
"I say, Horace, did you see those humans back there? They were just staring at us. How rude."
Bishopwhitet
"Dude, you almost ran over those frogs!""Yeah, that was close. I bet they shit a pile of bricks!"
GangstaCrizzab
Oh man craptions just started so I actually have a shot. What do I say what i do say. The pressure. is it hot in here?
Jonny5
Nooooo, British time went back by an hour!! I missed the chance for a perfect craption :(
Backinblack
They're green so it could be the St. Patricks, but they're frogs so that can't be it.... unless they're drunken Irishmen, then it makes perfect sense!!!
archefox
The creepy part is there's a princess under each chimney trying to make them human again.
johndarick
OH MY GOD! How the shit are they moving if theyre legs are dangling off the side?!
monkeyxult
I get that we are frogs on chimneys and all. But why are carrying these baskets?
zero82
"What does THIS have to do with christmas? Noth.. oh, yeah. I remember now. Merry Christmas to all!"
jakflak
Kids, if you're good Santa will come down the chimney with gifts. But if you're bad....
Zalas
When you kiss a frog, you get a prince. When you kiss a frog in a chimney, you get a dumbass.
pjunk
If a princess kisses a frog, he becomes a prince. If a hooker gives a prince genital warts...
RogersIB
"SEE! I told you the 'Aliens From Earth Costumes' were the 'IT' costume this year! BUT NO! You said wearing these chimneys would be the reptiles pajamas."
RogersIB
"Yep, more stinkin' candy! Let's call it a night and go home and watch 'Lord of the Flies'."
Mixmastermind
The Invasion of the Chimney-Snatchers was not received as well as its prequel.
klayb
why do we all after the 10 first caption waste our time seriously no one votes and no one cares T_T
patjk73
The only known known predator of the one eyed one horned flying purple eater was the big lipped big crowned squatting green chimney dweller.
Celestia
What the Jackson brothers have been doing for money ever since Michael left them out of his will.
angerfrog
All's WELL that ends WELL, huh? Yeah, you get it? Because we're frogs sitting on...fuck it, everyone thinks these are chimneys.
Balthraka
Public embarassment was part of their court ordered punishment for mass culling of frogs. It's good to see that judges still have a sense of humour.
stodavr
After their career in commercials dried up, the Budweiser frogs tried desperately to resurrect their career through parades.
getittwistd
Dear Diary, Aliens landed at our base in Roswell today. They look so retarded we've decided to deny they even exist. The only evidence of them is this photo I'm conveniently including with this entry.
Fawkes13
Disney's taking the advertising for The Princess and the Frog a bit too far.....
imaginarybird
Whatever you do, don't fall for the "if you kiss me, I'll turn into a handsome prince" line.
Kamikaze Phoenix
Why did that guy say he didn't want warts? Seriously, I don't have any warts, do I?
Harlond
The King Mutant Frog Chimney Sweepers were never as popular as the teenage mutant ninja turtles.
Soneji
"So then I said "Of course I have evidence that aliens invaded!" but he still didn't believe me."
Kamikaze Phoenix
Kermit's redneck relatives used to block off the street for hours, drunkenly harassing everyone. You can see why he moved away to the city.
Zangetsu
Awwww, you wore the same costume too? Now there's four of us, God this will be embarassing!
Copperpot
When the humans landed on Mars they realized that Earth wasn't the only planet with a Gay Pride Parade.
OttoGaines
and the craze of writing something to the like of "First" has been winning for the past three days
mrmcduff
The frog people hadn't yet figured out the part about making their chimney-bathrooms in "discreet" locations.
Zangetsu
I bet the girl in the background dressed as a princess is turning 'green' from jealousy...
Kamikaze Phoenix
I smell flies. Do you smell flies? I think we are getting close to the picnic. Maybe this year I'll get drunk and fertilize some eggs.
OSUmigl84
American stereotypes for the French obviously weren't taken into account when their spies picked their disguises.
deadmanRise
"You know, I don't know why we keep finding fellow Froggers' corpses in the str- HOLY CRAP A SEMI!"
Faceplant
The Jones family was so impressed with their Halloween costumes, that they shit a brick... Ok, 100 bricks.
gennytte
Don't look now, but I think three other people wore the same outfit to the party! Très embarassing.
mrmcduff
Alright guys, I just know these costumes are going to get us laid tonight. Have I ever let you down?
87gn
It's really quite simple...because some of are born leaders, and some of are born to carry the baskets of their crap.
Kamikaze Phoenix
So I'm not a tadpole anymore. So what? We can still go trick or treating. That guy didn't have to be such a dick to us. He stuck HIS tongue out at me first anyway...
Emwurst
Knowing that they lacked the key ingredient, the Frog Kings dared the world to blow smoke up their asses.
flyingpenguin
later they burned a local law enforcement officer inside a giant wooden iguana sitting on a thatched aga
Zangetsu
You know you've taken thematic parties too far when you announce a 'Royal Amphibians and how they impact construction' party.
spectre_vampire
Unfortunately, those tongues of theirs aren't going anywhere near a girl!
Majackmail
When the portals to Super Mario World finally opened, only horror came out the other side.
Kamikaze Phoenix
Yes, we are all kings, but I'm also the mayor, so you all have to listen to me.
Kamikaze Phoenix
I would play my ocarina, but I'm not really sure I want them singing...
Dethteddy
Haha silly humans, giving us candy means that raping you through your toilets is perfectly legal now
The23
As the children happily looked on, four of the most dangerous serial killers escaped to freedom right behind the Shriners.
Ironlightsaber
I know you spent a lot of time on these, but Mom...........these costumes suck ass.
gennytte
Due to the devastating effects of urban development on brick-sitting-king-frogs, this rare species could someday disappear forever.
milkmankaos
Chimney dwelling frogs, frog eating chimneys... Same diff. The French are still fucked for eating all of the god-damned frog legs.
Csonny
See what happens when you don't clean your rooms kids. Your parents will humiliate you horribly
Zenejinzorin
Kermit the Frog's new mobile model went through many budget cuts because of the recession.
Backinblack
I don't know what they're doing, but I am pretty sure it's illegal in most states.
ElHuerta
Martha, gimme my shotgun. Those g'damn critters from africa are now here to eat my crops. Well, eat lead instead. G'Dam UN-conspiracee.
noreport
What people who love playing wii look like inside...yeah, I'm saying they're retarded.
Kamikaze Phoenix
I don't think the people at the grocery minded us stealing their baskets...I think they were just happy to have us leave.
pappysassafras
A Teenage Mutant Chimney Dumper draws near! Command? ------------- | Fight Spell | | Run Item | -------------
Kamikaze Phoenix
I'm not feeling froggy enough to jump off. You go first. I'll jump when I see it's safe.
Kamikaze Phoenix
I said "frog" and he said "how high?" and y'know, I was so baked I just started laughing.
JewDude
Hey do you smell Frog Legs cooking? OH CRAP! These aren't shishing wells they are grills!!!!
JewDude
Hey do you smell Frog Legs cooking? OH CRAP! These aren't whishing wells they are grills!!!!
bamentt
It keeps getting more difficult to find opportunities for the Jackson's after Michael croaked.
PenisPower
Haha, dude we rule! The chicks love us! Good things these bricks are blocking my boner.
swankyway
If you refuse to let them go, behold, I will plague all your borders with frogs. Exodus 8:2
piggofdoom
After the (slight) success of the Super Mario Bros. Movie, major Hollywood studios started scooping up all the video games... except Battle Toads.
Most_Inane_Uno
"I TOLD you not to show dad Urban Dictionary! He never fucking reads the definitions!". "At least he doesn't know what a 'Red Lipped Royal Toad Stool' ACTUALLY is". "Happy Halloween you douchebags."
Tuberculosis
If Oscar the Grouch and Kermit the Frog had kids...and those kids decided to make a living haunting my dreams.
danimal92
And this is why halloween in the south so scary. These were costumes the family already had from a rendition of mary poppins aquatic.
JDLT
You know what I don't care what they say, our chimmney dance troupe was the best...fucking Mary Poppins!
RogersIB
Halloween is a hoppy time for the Frogger family. They can actually cross the road and people are watching out.
Ranger
4 Chimney-stealing Negros in hiding. Oh... and Neil Fifer (Captain America) in the background calling the cops!
themindsmack
Lesbian princess frogs of ribbitland try out the new portable eating-out wells, now available for lesbian tadpoles!
Otacon
And so, the Elves found out that trying to be Santa only results in getting your ass stuck in a chimney.
Boy_Genius
The princess hoped to kiss a frog and transform him into a prince. Instead all she got was a bunch of queens.
MelvinVM
They're trying to start a propaganda against Santa Claus, but it isn't working.
zero82
"All hail Kings of... uh-oh. Car coming! Car coming! I cant run with this thing on! Your majesty needs braves soldiers!"
RogersIB
"Kiss me I'm a prince you said. You'll be my princess you said. You left out one little thing didn't ya frog boy? I don't even know how to swim for toads sake."
Blancgab
They're just getting ready for Halloween; they want to lose all their dignity before the 31st.
Zangetsu
The princess in the background kicked all four of them out after kissing them just made them all the more disgusting...
RogersIB
"Lady's stacked and that's a fact, she aint't holding nothin' back, she's a BRICK HOUSE....yeah.. sling me some tongue baby!"
paulg
you think that's surprising? check this out. Diet Mountain Dew has all the taste of regular dew,without the calories.
cloudy_girl6
"Mmmf Daddy, can I come out now?" "Shh! Not yet Jimmy, We'll trade places in the bushes"
HockeyTemper
Piranha Plants antagonize the plumbers on strike outside the Mushroom Castle.
A_Beaux
The kids found it difficult to understand Mum's 'spawn of the devil' costume idea
ElHuerta
"And then the chimney-frog kings lived their life happily together..." And so ends the fairy tale of the 4 homosexual kings, which I have been obliged by law to read to you children to promote equality.
codeline
Toad would be very upset when he found out the Toadstool people were cast in a humiliating light when portrayed in the Mushroom Kingdom parade.
arkhmpatient
The Princess was disappointed when she kissed one and it turned into Dick Van Dyke.
RobertJSawyer
Cripes, another stupid meme gets loose in the wild. Thanks heaps, Richard Dawkins.
Rcoutme
"Just keep walking, Laura! No! Don't look their way; it will only encourage them!"
ishmaelone
this is what happens when you wait til the last minute to buy your family halloween costumes.
RogersIB
This is an early warning to all. Go out and get a costume NOW, before all that's left is this. This service message brought to you by your son or daughter who is starting to panic as Halloween approaches.
dungeonmaster11
It wasn't until AFTER they were married that the Frog Prince learned about a little 'well-related' curse the princess had been hiding from him.
RogersIB
Personally I don't find all this amphibious humor funny, my mother-in-law is a toady.
T-Weezy
What's with the chimneys? I mean, I understand the half-assed frog costumes, but *chimneys*? Really?
RogersIB
Down below the flies taunted them, "When the log rolls over I will die, I will die, lalalala..."
Justabloodygame
"Fear not earthlings, we come in peac... wait guys, this is serious, why are you laughing?"
panzerfrog
With four kings civil war is near in the kingdom of... well, wherever there freaks come from...
roflzwaflz
I can only imagine what the hell they were thinking of when they decided to put these on.
ARejectSoShy
What the Royal Family will look like in the future if they continue inbreeding.
skittlepie345
The frog king's didn't get any kisses on halloween Night from naive princess'. Reason? For shitting in chimney's.
Stonemason69
Suddenly, John realised the futility in hosting a fancy-dress party with a 'Frogger' theme.
patjk73
Pedophiles will do almost anything to try to trick little girls into kissing them.
HMS_Ford
Screw you guys, I'm going home. Walking frogs in chimneys is where I draw the line.
kaly76hummer
My friends recommended me a very interesting place __AgelessFriends.com__ It's a nice and free place for Younger Women and Older Men, or Older Women and Younger Men, to interact with each other. Age gap is not a problem there. You may wanna check it
Indigo_Dingo
I don't carwe that there are white people in the background, I refuse to believe this didn't happen in Japan
augiesgirl
maybe we should be a happy king instead of our main ingredient next time. i think our burger sales will go up way more
SuperJew
Before the invention of the toilet, even frog PRINCES had to resort to using chimney pots/their neighbor's chimney
ElHuerta
Yeah, I told mom about us wanting Godzilla costumes. I wonder what part of the "Fearsome lizard, king of all reptiles and tall as house" she didn't understand...
patuw
when Mario gets done collecting those coins, he is in for an unpleasant surprise...
sethro
As the second plague in Egypt developed, the Jews quickly realized why God "suggested" they build chimneys on the pyramids.
jokeface
In this version of Frogger, you play as the car, and you're SUPPOSED to hit the frogs.
jokeface
"I say, Reginald, there seems to be a smokey odor wafting from my crapper...Ought I see a doctor, you reckon?"
ipsocrapto
Wait! Wait...it's fake. They're not real frogs. I can clearly see their feet. Everybody can relax.
pwscott
Prince, Paris, Blanket and Uncle Tito try to enjoy the Halloween week without all the hype.
Zerowind
In some remote, God-forgotten land, THIS is considered to be a normal Halloween night.
Sparky23
Ethel and Lisa couldnt understand why the boys always wanted to make their return from the supermarket some sort of odd parade
The_Killah29
Family Hollowen night is a disaster for the Brown family when they all decided to go as the same frog-shitting-in-a-chimney costume.
The_Killah29
Wow, the Warner Bros. frog's family fell into hard times since WB let him go.
andrenavarro
"Yeah, guys, judging by our audience we shouldn't have set this up next to that strip club."
brokenwings0584
Japanese version of Kermit The Frog, which for no other reason than they are Japanese, merged with Bowser
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