Julius_Goat
The one Stormtrooper who actually shot somebody got quite a reward from the Emperor.
captainHamsack
You know what's funnier? The amount of votes I'll get for NOT being first.
WorstNameEver
Poor Michaeil Jackson. He never did realize his lifelong dream of becoming the most fabulous stormtrooper in the Empire
racedogg2
It's a good thing he's showing off his chest hair a little, or else he'd be a total loser.
fede80
Not pictured: a crowd of giant hamsters pointing and laughing... f*** too late...
Ineptly
This voting system is extremely flawed! Christophe up there proves it. CRACKED,FIX THIS! There has to be a better way. First or second always wins with mediocre craptions. Vote this, if you agree
geniuswaitress
"Well you can tell by the way I use my walk, I'm the emperor's man --no time to talk."
racedogg2
The Cracked staff have their annual Halloween party... somewhere else, because this guy is way uncooler than them.
racedogg2
He spent $1,000 on the costume. He later spent $10 for that pizza he ate alone, and $5 to get the red out of his eyes from when he cries himself to sleep.
Kamikaze Phoenix
He actually looks way more manly than everyone else at the convention.
dpollok
Deney Terrio couldn't even hide during Halloween. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deney_Terrio
Mr.Excalibur
Stop looking at Uma like that! Just go home, jerk-off, and everything will be fine!
Nevlach
What do you mean I'm a funny guy? Like funny how, like a clown? Do I amuse you? Joe Pesci joins the dark side.
Julius_Goat
You know what's even funnier? Christophe will get his Craption deleted no matter how many votes he gets. Oh shit, so will I now.
Versus
It took a minute for the Empire to figure out why most of their troops were dying by head shots.
WorstNameEver
"Okay, so maybe tomorrow I'll work on not making gay jokes in craptions."
Julius_Goat
The one stormtrooper who actually shot somebody got quite a nice prize from the Emperor.
Julius_Goat
"Who's the white Imperial guard who makes ladies swoon when he gets hard? Shut yo mouth! But I'm just talkin' bout Stormtrooper. Then we can dig it!"
ChaseMitchell
"Say hello to my little friend!" he yelled before firing a blast of wildly inaccurate laser fire that missed everyone in the room.
Rockforchumps
After I left high school, I became a millionaire, a storm trooper, AND a sailor. What did you say you were? Accountant?
geniuswaitress
If you watch very, very carefully, there are obvious signs Star Wars was made in the '70s.
jzarzycki
The saddest part is: When he does the finger guns to ladies at the bar he always misses by a good ten feet.
jkeener
"I get the ladies attention with the helmet. I keep their attention with the necklace."
Dbooner13
This Competition is horse shit, the same few people get the most votes every time, even when they steal craptions from others....
BillWilliams
Two days and no gay Craptions, but we're not fooled. Mr. Gay Craptioneer is on vacation. Probably in San Fran-gayco.
racedogg2
When you're the uncoolest guy at a disco party, you know something has gone very wrong in your life.
Kamikaze Phoenix
The Death Star was way more fun after Darth Vader got his own "Solid Gold" dancers.
Julius_Goat
"Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Luke's stayin' alive, stayin' alive. Because! I! Can't! Shoot! Straight! Stayin' aliiiiiiiiive!!"
Backinblack
Why yes, I DO have a thermal exhaust port that's extremely vulnerable, why do you ask?
grafton
For the last time Steve. It would NOT be cooler if we made the Death Star look like a glitter-ball.
bdadz
Man, he could probably blow up the Death Star just with the amount of light he's reflecting off his helmet.
CavalierX
Obi-Wan made a few other "suggestions" to the stormtroopers that were later cut from the film.
Mr.Excalibur
I'll tell you what this gay Stormtrooper thinks is funny. Craptions without context to the picture that do well always get cut!
ChaseMitchell
Due to a typo in the screenplay, the original version of the Al Pacino classic was called "Star Face."
noreport
Bring me your used jewellery, watches, bracelets, solid gold storm trooper helmets, rings and I'll give you Cash!
RogersIB
"Aww..Star Wars, Nothing But Star Wars Give Me those Star Wars Don't let them end. Oh Star Wars If they should bar wars Please let these Star wars stay".
hamsterjelly
"Dicks, pussy, fag, gay" -CavalierX There, everything I need to win the Craption. Happy?
AAAAAAAAAA42
Not pictured: A giant crowd of hamsters pointing and laughing at the artists rendition of his inflamed whatever was going on the the left Guitar Hiro 1001 feet from Japan on the dark side of the moon.
Chimeros
Struggling with being a clone, Phil decided to act out in order to be different
Blinker_Fluid
First you get the fear, then you get the anger, then you get the hate and then you get the suffering.
dpollok
Out of uniform? No, Lord Vader. The handbook says that Fridays are for more casual dress.
Awesominator
A long, long time ago in a galaxy far, far away... This marks one of first occurrences of the phrase, "Disco will never die."
Kamikaze Phoenix
I would pay good money to read what it says on that board, because I'm pretty sure it's the only explanation for whatever this is.
Kamikaze Phoenix
George Lucas discovered that he could make people appreciate the original trilogy more by making increasingly bad sequels.
Watchtower
Damn, if Stormtroopers look like this, then Darth Vader has to look like a drag queen.
Casstaway
"Billy Mays here ... guys, don't let your fear of getting H1N1 flu - keep you in on a Saturday night ..."
The_Killah29
"The coveted golden disco-ball stormtrooper helmet... Only 3 other stormtroopers got them. How did you get it?" "I s****d off the emperor."
RogersIB
Spock was quite frankly pissed! He knew Star Wars had stolen his whole mind controlly thing, and thus it was only logical that now he steal the golden vader award.
RogersIB
As Travolta got older he only took roles that concealed his by then tired face. Dementia may also have played into his choice of this particular role.
jimipop
This is one of the few storm troopers that has ever been good at....staying alive.
jimipop
Fiddy Cent, in an attempt to look less gangsta and thus get shot less, tried this hat briefly. Sadly, he's now also been shot nine times with a bowcaster.
jimipop
You all make fun, but the Gay Empire is much more powerful than the regular one.
rrabbit
“Virgin? What!? Haha, who told you that… that’s just… that’s just ridiculous. Me, a virgin… ha… Who told you that!? No, seriously… who told you that? Was it Paul? No? You just guessed? Is it the necklace? My Mother did say it was too
Ronin22
Unlike the thousands of storm troopers before him, this guy plans on uh uh uh uh stayin' alive!
brucexedwards
Uncle Ned finally decided on a new look to cover up his hair loss problem.
Versus
The helmet says 'Military Man' but the captain's wheel chain says 'In The Gay Navy'.
Kamikaze Phoenix
Brace yourselves people. I regret to inform you that they have stared filming "Episode 7", and holy shit is it BAD! This is the misfit stormtrooper who helps "ZhaZha Binks" (son of JarJar).
Ratsn3farious
Behind that mask, he's really crying and begging his mom to pick him up from the prom.
Backinblack
Yes,those are not the droids I am looking for, but where have YOU been all my life???
Kamikaze Phoenix
How much you want to bet that his landspeeder has neon around the license plate?
Kamikaze Phoenix
Sir, our stealth mission failed! Everyone is dead, and the ship got blown up! I have no idea how they spotted us!!!
troll_alx
A battle station the size of the Death Star obviously must include recreational facilities for the troops.
RogersIB
Well you can tell by the way I use the force, I'm a woman's man..ahahah stayin aliiiiive.
Charlie1224
"Storm Trooper two, I told you not to waste our money, we needed it to protect the death stars weak spot.
RogersIB
A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away, it is a period of civil war, rebel spaceships, and fabulous stormtroopers.
darkestknight
Michael Jackson thought dressing up like a storm trooper would help his chances with the children
largetuna6
Imma let you blow up the death star, but I just want you to know that I made one of the best stormtrooper helmets of all time..
gypsy61
The advantages of being posted on Curosant is that you join the elite Disco Brigade
gypsy61
These aren't the droids you're looking for... and while we're at it, go make yourself sparkle
WinstonWebb
Try as they might, the Empire could never produce an officer as pimp as Lando Calrissian.
Lavender
When you consider the amount of time it took to paint all those Scrabble tiles - you're still not impressed, just deeply saddened.
Zangetsu
Just like the normal Star Wars, except now my erection makes me feel uncomfortably flamboyant...
Tesuansey
I bet someone wins that incorrectly says something about it being Darth Vader.
WorstNameEver
Looks like the Empire finally repealed their "Don't ask, don't tell" policy.
geniuswaitress
“When I left you, I was but the learner, now I am the master...of the Hustle."
NightOwl26335
John Travolta was reluctant to enter the courtroom without a disguise ... luckily his pal George Lucas had a plan .....
WaterRocket
Emperor: That whole death star incident set us back quite a few space bucks Vader: Ohh...Shit...You are not going to like the new uniform improvements I made
Kamikaze Phoenix
Whatever this is, Family Guy will soon find a way to mention and explain it. I'm sure it will be integral to the plot.
Kamikaze Phoenix
Five minutes later, Kanye West surrendered his gay retarded penis. Meanwhile in soviet union, penis surrenders West.
danimal92
k-fed, ill let you finish and all, but Beyonce had one of the best Halloween costumes ever.
Backinblack
Use the force Luke! Now use it again, but faster. Just a bit faster... yeah, that's it!
Backinblack
"I'll never join you! You killed my father!" "No Luke, I raped your father!"
Versus
Do you know what's even funnier than that? The number of votes I'll get for copying not one, but two non-contextual entries!
Sephris
The battle was fierce, laser cannons were bombarding us from nearly all fronts. I saw a cannon pointed right at us and shouted to my men "GET DOWN! NOW!" But of course this trooper had to be a smart ass...
Casstaway
"Hi, I am thirty years old, divorced, with three little robots and looking for that special woman who can make my light saber pulse".
Casstaway
President Obama finally figured out how he could keep Vice President Biden from putting his foot in his mouth ... all the time.
maserati1945
Seriously, people need to stop voting so much for the first couple. Read down the list ladies and gents.
T-Weezy
I bought a golden Storm Trooper helmet with MY stimulus package. What have you done with yours?
jack_pought
Listen, George, this isn't what African Americans meant when they said they wanted to be represented in your movies!
connan
The only storm trooper who survived, because he was...Staying Alive! Staying Alive! Uh uh uh, staying ALIVE!
josancho
Roy finally returns to work with seigfried....this time better equiped for the tiger act
drmaybe
With the Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy revoked, Gary could finally be comfortable at the Death Star galas.
RogersIB
When Turtle Man hit the stages in Vegas at the same time as Wayne Newton there was a real star war.
eric1977
If you can think of a better way to hide a zit on your nose, I'd like to hear it.
Charlie1224
"Aliens and Christmas don't mix and know we know Star Wars and this decade don't go together."
savinator
Tatooine HS Yearbook, 1975. Anakin Skywalker. Drama 1,2,3,4; Fencing 3,4. Student government 4. Sci-fi Club 1,2,3,4. Future career: Guidance counselor.
hamsterjelly
Actually, that's pretty awesome and probably took months to work on. I have nothing to say.
overature
After saving the galaxy, Luke was forced to make the decision between his developing homosexuality and his dying fathers advice of quiting the rebel alliance and joining the empire
Casstaway
"I must be a chick magnet, man. I got Lady Gaga stuck to my ass. Get her off ....!"
JamezBond
Saturday night fever ....party hard cos Monday u get shipped off to work on the Death Star....
ATPkid
"My name is steve and although I may be just one of a billion storm troopers I made my uniform look fabulous"
BogusCraft
This is where the money went that was "lost" during the death star's construction.
QA_Tester
Even in the days of the Empire "Don't ask, don't tell" was standard policy.....
NightOwl26335
The development of the disco ball shaped death star suddently makes a hell of a lot more sense.
jjok
Before hitting it big in "Saturday Night Fever", John Travolta tried out as an extra on Star Wars.
Zangetsu
I see a futuristic, mechanical, storm-trooper related, homosexual penis joke flourishing.
Sissyphus
Early attempts at 'using the force' largely revolved around confusing people with pretty sparkly things.
WorstNameEver
"Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk, I'm a Hutt's man, no time to talk."
Sissyphus
I'm still mad they cut out the scenes where Anakin had a brief fling with the Fabulous side of the Force.
jjok
My pimp told me I had to have his money to him by 4AM......and that I had to find out where the Rebel base is on Alderaan
WaterRocket
Emperor: That whole death star incident set us back quite a few space bucks Vader: Ohh...Shit...You are not going to like the new uniform improvements I made
WaterRocket
Emperor: That whole death star incident set us back quite a few space bucks Vader: Ohh...Shit...You are not going to like the new uniform improvements I made
howvery
For those of you who thought the release of Star Wars brought on the demise of disco...
MaliciousStig
Yo! I heard you like bling! So I put bling on your helmet so you can bling while you wear your helmet!
howvery
Never forget that Saturday Night Fever and Star Wars came out in the same year. Wasn't always easy to pick a side.
savinator
I think the Oregon Ducks have really gone too far this time with their football uniforms.
jakflak
When the Empire sent 'undercover officers' into the disco they couldn't figure out why they were so ineffective.
kaptkarl
Lyle the "new guy" showing support of the dark side's change of the "don't ask, don't tell" policy..
Kamikaze Phoenix
Just be home by midnight or your Tie Fighter will turn back into a pumpkin.
Wackbeard
Luke killed all the Stormtroopers aboard the Deathstar..killed em dead..dead as disco
tsarmeister
Would ya just watch the helmet. Ya know, I work on my helmet a long time and you hit it. He hits my helmet.
RogersIB
Travolta's screen test for Darth Vader was panned, however he was given serious consideration for the role of Yoda.
RogersIB
Long heckled for their hideous uniforms, the Oregon Ducks soon found a way to make no one really notice their uniforms.
Charlie1224
"John Travolta had just gotten over his drug fueled urge to make Saturday Night Fever, why punish him more?"
MattBlack
If you think the Star Wars Holiday Special was bad, just consider that this was one of the things they took out of it.
phoulx
Who's laughing now! Judy Garland-fest and Star Wars-fest on the same night and I'm the only one with proper attire!
Dr.EllisDTrails
"Well-you-can-TELL-bytheway-my-hel-met-rocks, I-am-40, man, Ijerk-off-insocks!"
phoulx
NHL commissioner Gary Bettman is pleased to announce the relocation of the Phoenix Coyotes to the underserved hockey market - the Death Star. Here's goalie Daartho Vaader showing off his new uniform.
RogersIB
Jive talkin' ~ You wear a disguise ~ Jive talkin' ~ so misunderstood, yeah ~ Jive talkin' ~ you just ain't no good.
RogersIB
Amigo, the only thing in this world that gives orders is balls. Balls. You got that?
johnnyzoo
After months of persuading Steve looks on as his idea for Star Wars the Musical is finally canned.
nerdygy
My qulifications? Well as you can see I grew up on the death star, and I love Disco.
hotdogfingers
Hey baby. Let's go back to my place so you can show me your Grand MUFF Tarkin.
Bishopwhitet
Lando's first attempt at infiltrating the Empire's base unnoticed did not go well.
Kamikaze Phoenix
I'm not saying he's a goldtrooper, but he's messing with a cold stupor...
bigbadnerd
When Leia proved resistant to conventional interrogation techniques, Vader got creative.
GreenDayGirl
Today they just started the shooting for the remake of starwars. The producer says he wants to 'bring it into the new age'
Kamikaze Phoenix
The Emperor warns you...be back at the base by midnight or your Tie Fighter will turn back into a pumpkin.
earlotterby
Introducing the new 70s Storm trooper, it gets down to the disco beat on the battlefield
TromeoQue
You think that's weird, you should see the guy dressed as the Terminator with a Flock of Seagulls hairdo.
Kamikaze Phoenix
Damn foreigners, acting like they own the place, trying to take our jobs and women...shhh! Here he comes!
Casstaway
Dirk Diggler refused to admitt his career was over at the premiere of his self-produced "Boggie Nights: Hand Solo".
overature
I won the all Death Star break dance competition and all they gave me was this crappy disco ball
Necrolove
Due to the Empire's no gays policy, Kevin became a judge on So You Think You Can Dance.
Necrolove
Steve's sexual orientation and the Empire's no gays policy left no option than to seek employment at a discotheque in Aldera.
Casstaway
"As my resume' states - I work well in a troup setting; I'm used to firing on the run; and I think the galaxy is yours ... if you give me a chance".
Casstaway
"Hello, 911? My space ship just took off and I think it's got my son in it ..."
panbient
After the 2nd Death Star blew up the Empire expanded into the oldest trade in the galaxy.
Roma87
"Me at the Roxbury do you see?" "Yes I see oh god" "Me getting down and funky fresh do you see?" "I SEE!" "ME AND MY LOVE FOR STAR WARS AND GOLD DO YOU SEE?!?!
Casstaway
"Ok, Simon, I'm from a galaxy far, far away, and I'm going to sing for you, & Randy & Ellen ... my favourite song ... "Dance With My Father, Again".
Casstaway
Richard Heene appeared on CNN and stated emphatically that the ballon incident was not a hoax.
The_Killah29
The others were envious of J43, so noone said anything when they shot him in the back and took his gold helmet.
Casstaway
If you thought most of the contestants on American Idol were from other planets - now you know.
RogersIB
"Hey George! George Lucas. Good to see ya here at the club. And who is that lovely lady beside you Jabba"?
RogersIB
Yeah sure, being a lawyer had been good to Darth. But he had a sense that he was destined for badder things.
Casstaway
Those who have craptions with only one vote, don't fret. It's just that you have no friends!
Casstaway
Apple just announced the Ipod will be replaced by the "I-Head: Star Wars Edition".
coopsey
This is why John Travolta kept his affair with Leonardo from the Turtles secret...
Casstaway
Richard Heene appeared on CNN and stated emphatically that the balloon incident was not a hoax.
RogersIB
The youthful Darth Vader knew he had only one chance to catch the eye of Darth Susie.
RogersIB
Congratulations on winning the dance contest young man. Get ready for an all expenses paid vacation on that vacation destination, the planet Alderaan. "Oh sh**!"
RogersIB
Darth willingly traded riding man made asteroids, for the unbridled joy of riding a man's hemorrhoids.
pixelpenguin
Unlike the standard Storm Trooper armor, this helmet actually protects against lasers by reflecting them into a funky array of light.
Casstaway
Yeah, Darth, was my father. Did you think Letterman was the only one who ever screwed the staff?
Casstaway
"No, I don't echo ... echo .... echo ... echo ... when I speak .... speak ... speak ..."
HUMLY
Just put something from "Rumours" on the turntable and our tribute to 1977 will be complete.
Badteddybear
Evidently the Imperial Navy does not have a "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy.
BillTheButcher
Tony Montana likes to remain anonymous when he goes to the gay disco club known as Studio 54.
87gn
Noah Yoder's attempt to blend in at YouTube Live were amazingly successful. Hardly anyone even noticed him.
Pieter
Mr. Lucas, I have an idea...how about we all wear full armor instead? Also, maybe Luke Skywalker should be played by a human...it's really tough training a bear for a role that complex. Just my two cents.
Shermankohlberg
Now where the heck is that bedazzled wookie?... I swear, this snl/starwars crossover joke isn't going to work without him. I may be Wild on my own, but who am I without Crazy?
dragonslair
Should have brushed my teeth, it smells like 42 miles of ass in this fucking helmet.
ridethewalrus
Don't Ask Don't Tell's Legislative History can be traced back to a long time ago in a galaxy far far away
Rackmaster
The other storm troopers couldn't bring themselves to take his Sylvester Stallone movies away.
lc_ii
If a stormtrooper and a rich Turkish dude had a love child, this is what it would look like.
TheNihilist
After getting a nice "compensation check", Stormtrooper 246 decided it was time to upgrade...
TheNihilist
No longer working on the Death Star, this Stormtrooper decided to go into 70's porn flicks...
zombie-surviver
Aw dammit! Someone took my mint 'Disco Storm Trooper' out of it's original packaging!
breakfree89
Luke, I am your father. That's right. I'm your daddy. Who's your daddy now, b0tch?!?
kevinb
Behind the Music : Stormtrooper #17. Star wars was at its highest and fame was rampant for Stormtrooper #17. And then, he found his true calling, and joined the BeeGee's. It's also rumored "Staying alive" was his idea as he fled Deathstar.
Shananigans79
Sarah Jessica Parkers makeover for Sex In The City 2: Bag Me, I'm Fucking Ugly.
Shananigans79
for Saturday Night Fever 3,they have found a guy with a bigger chin than Travolta.
DrunkTank3000
Coming this summer: Rob Reiner is "Ermenegildo Montellban; Intergalactic Spacepimp..."
wolf11971
Minutes later, John Travolta left in shame, his application to join Gnarls Barkley denied.
Rex-Jester
One of the tragic, and often unmentioned, side-effects of Episode IV being released in 1977.
TheLysdexic
The resulting budget cuts after the destruction of the first Death Star halted the development of the Empire's new G.R.I.L.L.Z. Armour variant.
dungeonmaster11
Considering New Hope was made from '73 to '77, most of the Stormtroopers had to have quite a bit of disco slapped out of them.
ImaginaryDurden
The day the Death Star blew up was the day that disco died. What's that? It wasn't?
psuengr72
There should be a limit of 1 craption per picture. Some people are throwing a couple dozen horrible ones out there and just clogging the thread.
ccsocali
Looks like the storm troopers DID find the droid they were looking for... and a barry white CD, some spanish fly, and a lifetime of ridicule for their bastard child.
Woot_Man
NO! I will not shove my enormous horse dick up your ass to see what the 2 guys and 1 horse experienced!
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