Shurimpu
You can make fun of the kid all you like, but he's already more metal than anyone who plays Guitar Hero.
Tessica
Look at that cocky smirk. He still remembers what it feels like to be inside a vagina.
racedogg2
You see that five year old girl behind him? She just got impregnated with AWESOMENESS.
SpankMac
'Maybe if I hold a guitar and act all metal, nobody'll notice I pooped the shit out of everything back there.'
racedogg2
"So, Mary, how's your child doing?" "Well, we finally got him out of diapers." "Oh, that's pretty good. I mean, my son is only a WORLD FAMOUS ROCK STAR, but yeah, potty training. Pretty cool."
Versus
Laugh all you want, but his Twinkle Twinkle Little Star solo will melt your face off.
racedogg2
Every other kid was in line to get the swine flu vaccine, but little Carlos was in line BECAUSE HE FUCKING COULD BE.
Either it's child prodigy week or Midget S&M week... I don't know which I'd rather have.
magyarlou
Not wanting to fuck up this weeks trend, Yoshihiro plays "through the fire and flames"
Versus
If this isn't a poster child for birth control, then there is little hope for us all.
Ashfan89
Chuck! Chuck! It's Marvin! Your cousin, Marvin BERRY! You know that new sound you're looking for? Well, listen to this!
steeze_bucket
...Atleast his middle aged parents aren't living vicariously through him.
jmxcomp
The only thing more troubling than this kid is the guy in the background with his dick in a toilet paper roll asking the him to sing into the "microphone".
Mikelibrarian
The Nobel Prize committee just offered him a Grammy for his album that will come out in 2031.
noreport
Whole new meaning to "baby, you rock my world!" (awwww, wasn't that sweet? or was it creepy?)
noreport
*do do do doo "can't touch this!" (cuz you'll go to jail...because you're a pedophile.)
Kamikaze Phoenix
The "Hey Jude" Baby is now doing Spinal Tap covers, and goddamn is it awesome.
mrpeabody
Lu's wailing guitar solo in the talent portion of the contest secured his crown as 2009's Little Mr. Why Do My Parents Hate Me?
Mr.Excalibur
Hey guys...check this out...if I roll up this paper and hold it right here...it TOTALLY looks like a BONER!
racedogg2
"Oh Pablo, that's such a cute costume!" "Hey, you might think it's cute, but damnit I could make the toughest men cry with my story of drugs and heartbreak." "Aww, there's even a wittle guitar!"
zbosco13
Pictured: the exact moment it stops being cute and he starts getting cut out of family pictures.
987
Freddie??? You got reincarnated.... Asian??? Well good to see you again man - err try not to get the AID's this time round yhea?! - err must go, the lads are coming over for a beer - I'll tell Brian I bumped into you.
Mr.Excalibur
When you're the most populous nation in the world, you get bored quickly and make your kids do all kinds of dumb shit.
IcemanLeigh
Forget this kid, I'm waiting to see what the kid in the full body Bear suit behind him does.. I bet it's cool.
Kamikaze Phoenix
"Thank you! Thank you. For my next tune, I'll be doing classical-metal variations I wrote on the Sesame Street theme. Here we go now...one and a two..."
Steaderz92
I in no way condone child abuse...I'm just saying, sometimes the cocky little bastard deserves it.
Dunstin Checks Out
He chose this weeks craptions. Guess which Dragonforce song he loves.
Leaf
Laugh all you want - that was the best version of Rock-a-by baby I've ever fuckin' heard!
Kamikaze Phoenix
Everyone loves him, but really he's a poser who rips off his whole look from the third grade metal scene.
IcemanLeigh
"But mommy, I want a go now! He's done two songs already!" "Let him do one more hunny, he Fucking Rocks"
Casstaway
An Oreo addiction, trashed his playschool, two failed marriages. Yeah, kid, you made it!
Vandros
Don't think we don't see the ipod connected to the amp you little cheating bastard
matthew1809
Only the kid in the background had read "Where the Wild Things Are" prior to the audition.
gypsy61
"Hello Saint Mary's 5th Annual Jamboree, Ice Cream Social and PTA Bake Sale!!! Are you ready to rock?" - Bobby "Metal4Life" Nguyen
jmxcomp
The only thing more troubling than this kid is the guy in the background with his dick in a toilet paper roll asking him to sing into the "microphone".
bdadz
"You know why you lost the talent show? Cause you played goddamn 'Stairway to Heaven'! Stop being a poser and learn some more songs goddammit!"
Zangetsu
He may look like a rockstar, but if you look closely, you'll see the plugged in I-pod - Where the music is really coming from.
gypsy61
And I don't think I need to be playing with these medium strings, I need light gauge if I'm gonna thrash!
TheWibbleFish
After hearing that Axl Rose will literally recruit anyone, parents swarm to give their kids a chance to try out for Guns N' Roses.
Zangetsu
This paticular exhibit may seem docile and fire-less, but he's infact 'firing' up his amp as we speak!
JayColvin
The concert was kinda dull until the kid started shooting fireballs out of his guitar...
Jleon
Well thats all well and good, but did anybody happen to notice the lady pitching a tent in the back? or the bear? Fuckin asians.
Mr.Excalibur
Some musician experiment with heroin...currently, he's experimenting with a new thing called "solid food."
Kamikaze Phoenix
Young James Iha smiled when he realized that he could make a guitar wail like no one else in kindergarten.
IcemanLeigh
The new 'Rock Kid' application for the iPhone is available in 12 different languages!
Vandros
North Korea has responded to criticism that it is a joyless dictatorship with a mandatory early coolness program.
ParentesPizza
In japan were child molestation is legal,New from the "Touch a Tot" line, S&M Rocker Kid.
noodleboy200
There are so many orphans in China that children really need to stand out to get adopted...
Dbooner13
Someone protect that kid, some wierd white thing with legs is trying to touch him with it's penis!!!
Zangetsu
Michael Bay's 'School of Rock'..... Oh wait, are we done with the Michael Bay references? I'm out.
WorstNameEver
And the trend of craptions having something to do with FLAMING continues...
1.21jigawatt
I slipped away, 5 book ideas caught my instead... “Some wild girls.” Dan O' should try Sweden, Linkoping College. SMILES! all around.
secksomega
Upon hearing that Barak Obama won the Nobel prize, Japan decided to celebrate Halloween from now on. Makes sense to me.
patthehun
Sorta like American Idol except when you win, you get a bone marrow transplant.
samchristie
Jon and Kate's single-baby pregnancy prompted them to immediately sell him to Fender to help them bolster their Asian market share.
watermelonman
I don't know if you guys noticed, but the Craption that was in the lead yesterday saying the editor should be fired was actually deleted. It happened before when the deleted the actual winner the day it was announced for talking smack about them. De
troll_alx
Road Warrior Animal eventually gave up his musician dreams and formed the Legion of Doom.
AAAAAAAAAA42
This is the artists impression of his inflamed whatever was going on to the left testicle.
Casstaway
Barbie plane, Little Tykes limosine, Playschool mansion, Mom with implants. The plastic dream lives on, dude!
HMS_Ford
Very good, Azusa! Now for our next lesson we'll be learning to trash hotel rooms.
savinator
There I was in Sri Lanka, formerly Ceylon. I had to make doodies in my big boy pants or Ozzy wouldn't go on stage...
cfraute
That kid is going to get so much tail that he literally won't know what to do with it.
quagmyre
In staying with this week's theme of flaming, Lil Guitar dude is getting ready for his Hendrix at Monterey Zippo Shred.
thickredwater
Further proof that Brad Pitt has absolutely no control over how his children are raised.
aladdin
Nicely done, Craptions! Now that I prepared in advance 27 lough-till-you-fart-out-loud craptions, you decided to change the theme. Bravos!
Dbooner13
He is so talented, only thing left for him to do is drugs and STDs and he will be a full fledged rocker
momoy
Having invented the time machine, the first thing Bill did is to save the world from Eddie Van Halen. Next is Hitler.
jjok
The Rolling Stones decided to go through a youth movement when replacing Keith Richards
gypsy61
backstage, after shows, Bobby liked to have the girls lick powdered milk off his balls
Teecko
Seriously guys! Cracked needs 2 make a charity to stop the morons found in these craptions from breeding! This is an Excellant case!
bdadz
Disney must be recruiting young actors to keep the "High School Musical" franchise going as long as possible.
bdadz
Yeah, he pissed his pants. Not because he's a toddler, but because he's practically blackout drunk.
bdadz
Nice douchebag faux hawk. If you want to be a true rock star, you need to go full mohawk.
tyberious
Hey he is not on fire Billy said, OH yes he is responded his older american gentelman friend
okeydokey
What could possibly so interesting that no one gives a damn about a little asian guitarist in leather?
zbosco13
My question is: why wasnt the picture focused on the wii controller-carrying wii controller.
momoy
The kid would have won Best Costume Award except the Dora The Explorer luggage speaker ruined the whole thing.
Teecko
Wait hold on....is that guy in the back hav a penis rod?!.....vote 4 this 1 and my very first
1.21jigawatt
FLESHLIGHT: whatever the chink [meant chic] in white is holding, it looks obscene ! Run kids, run...
tlinner
Sure there's the asian Freddy Mercury in the foreground, but I'm more interested in the milk bottle with a boner behind him.
IcemanLeigh
Jack Black wasn't happy when the new member of Tenacious D stole all the limelight.. And Chicks.
Boopadre
The amp's volume level also affects the players age in this case it's on one. Because the kid is ashamed of his skills and hides his talent by being quiet
Boopadre
Little Joey was always a hit at the talent show but this year he up the anti with his metal get up
Fawkes13
I bet his mom was so happy when he started sleeping thru the night....five months later....guitar solos blasting the windows out.....
Fawkes13
I'm willing to bet his mom still wishes he was just crying at night and not shattering the windows of the house with his rockin' out....
Fawkes13
somehow I'm having a hard time seeing "Baa Baa Black Sheep" being played rock style in a stadium.......anyone else?
Kamikaze Phoenix
Fall upon your knees, for Miyamoto Musashi has reincarnated at last! Here, Baby Musashi shows off techniques from his "Book of Five Power-Chords".
Casstaway
Kate plus Eight (minus Jon) x Jon gets custody = Rock Band Plus Eight. You do the math!
cloudy_girl6
Let me rephrase myself: These craptions are getting worse and worse everyday.
paulg
William Hung knew his son would make it,when he did his dad's version of She Bangs on this weeks American Idol.
Casstaway
"I'm gonna get laid by that girl in the pink dress behind me - but I'd rather her mom!
Casstaway
If that doesn't get me laid then I still get to go home and suck on Mom's tits.
paulg
the new lead singer of Van Halen,Fok Yu, performed for a crowd at the local mall yesterday. not shown is his older brother Fok Mi.
WeezelNation
It sure seems like the majority of the midget rock stars out there today are Asian
sunshineman
What kind of parents would do that to a child?! Having to play a Fender Strat with a 10 volt amp!?
Miriku
I think people are getting a little TOO excited over the release of Brutal Legend...
Ratsn3farious
The only thing I can think of to make this on better is if that could was consumed by flames...
sweett310
"You know dawg, I dug the solo at the end, really did. But I just wasn't feeling the shoes and black leather straps dawg. It was just 'aight for me."
Ratsn3farious
To accompany the best trombone solo was followed by the cutest guitar solo ever. For his big finish the guitar and amp burst into flames.
RogersIB
Punk hair - check, Leather straps - check, Killer guitar - check, Changed diaper - Oh Crap!
RogersIB
Later, the young Kim Jong was angry when he learned no one was watching him during his nuclear solo. He swore that he would have his revenge one day.
Casstaway
"Ok, I lip synched the Alphabet Song. Rock stars aren't that smart, you know!"
Sirsolo
Pfft how lame. Kids that age should be getting 98% on Fire and the Flames. He's got some catching up to do.
DangerChocomog
NASA attempts to distract people from the fact that the moon-crash fucked up so much in the most disturbing way possible.
ralphlor
It's suspected that the North Korean clone of Elvis used contaminated material.
tehpirateguy
Seen here: Ryan Peake, the guitarist for Nickelback before his more well known years after the Operation.
Casstaway
"Sometimes when we (Ipod) touch, the honesty's too much ... and I Nano you ..."
LazyRui
This kid + yesterday's trombone solo in the background = chuck norris level of awesomness!
Csonny
It's sad that the loser of that talent show is killed due to China's new solution to over population
LazyRui
Can you see the weird smile? He's fighting with is inner rage, because he's ipod doesn't match with the rest...
Casstaway
Today's Wong Sawyer ... He gets high on you In the space invaders ... He gets Wii on you"
Casstaway
"Mary had a little Obama, he hasn't done shit and either will I ... oops, I take that back, he just won the Nobel Peace Prize."
PanamaJane
That's right bitch...your little sister has shown me her's and I've shown her mine.
Sirsolo
Oh I GET IT. He's playing Through the Fire and the Flames! It's still fire week!
Bookdust
In Japan, the don't have prepubescent beauty pageants, the have prepubescent cosplay.
savinator
If your erection lasts for more than 4 hours, stop staring at the fucking picture!
Wingman4508
I really don't think this is the best way for gay couples to prove they should be allowed to adopt.
Glenjih
Why is there an iPod docked in that speaker? Is he not really playing that guitar?! Damn you, leather-strapped Chinese rock baby. Damn you to Hell.
Macrob25
which one is more gay; the Asian baby in leather with the guitar or the green ipod mini
mehsoome
everything is good. but the green ipod on the amp doesn't suit the elegant colour scheme!
mister.write
And I thought Anime was weird... This live action Japanese stuff makes no goddamn sense at all!
dixe
his mum and dad were the biggest guitar hero fans ever in fact they wer playing during conception
Doexyneutric
Just think, he'll get more ass because of that single photo than you ever will.
Sidewinder42
The legacy of Gene Simmons' touring career comes back to haunt us all............
pistolMcGregor
its either halloween or theres a contest to form a new set of the village people
DangerChocomog
At the news that the next Dalai Lama had been discovered, the people of Tibet were rather surprised with his somewhat unorthodox treatment of the Diamond Sutra (in open G).
CXC-runner-083
two years ago, he was getting more pussy than anyone... he was fuckin LIVING in a vagina
Gothic
If you listen really carefully, you can hear teenage boys around the world crying for the fact that they just got out-manned by a 6 year old kid.
Grimsend
you give me 2 dola i love, you give me 5 dola i love loooooong time, you give 10 dola, i loooove you forever!!!
bolankeith
Now Jon has left Kate, the kids have to work extra hard to retain the lifestyle they are all used to.
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