PenisVagina
The rule even applies for dark jedi knights, NEVER pass out with your shoes on.
Tessica
Now we know why Vader was always breathing heavily. He was trying to hold back the tears.
ChaseMitchell
If a cop sees a hippie wearing something like this, he's definitely going to use excessive Force.
ChaseMitchell
Much like certain dictators in our galaxy, Vader was a failed art student.
spydrmunkie
Somedays Vader would wear the pink suit just to see if anyone was dumb enough to say anything
Tessica
Vader went through a phase where he abandoned the Sith Lords for the Sissy Lords.
sish2000
He always thought it was the dark side of the force, but it was really just the voices in his head
Jeepster
"Luke, I know I said I was your Father. You may now address me as your 'Mother'."
Tessica
Tears lead to hunger. Hunger leads to self-loathing. Self-loathing leads to tears. What I'm trying to say is I'm your father.
NightOwl26335
Did you hear that loud "thud"? It was the price of Lucasfilm, Inc. stock crashing down, way down.
sish2000
Mrs. Vader started to go a little crazy due to Darth's long hours and time away from home
Diasdiem
After that, Darth Vader made sure he never got drunk and passed out at a party ever again.
bcanders
Dude, I was like "tear this ship apart" and they were like "whatever". He didn't say it, but I could totally tell that was what he was thinking.
bilbo1
The Dark Lord of the Sith was painfully unaware of what had happened when he fell asleep in the that dark alley in Mos Eisley.
Blinker_Fluid
If you won't come to the dark side maybe your sister will. We have a helmet and everything ready for her.
Brett-Butler
'Hello, is that tech support? It's Annakin. Listen, you know the psychic helmet you developed for me? Well, it's not working the way I hoped...'
NinjaBeatle526
The only halloween costume to make emos, nerds, and skaters hate you at the same time.
ironeyelids
I think it's cheating to write 'voices in my head' twice. Did he run out of ideas? just sayin'.
Julius_Goat
"So like, there's this Force, right? But like it has a light side, and then it has this DARK side, man. AND NO WAIT, MAN, because the DARK SIDE is like SO MUCH BETTER THAN THE LIGHT SIDE, MAN!!"
Brett-Butler
Amongst the remnant of the Death Star we found some coffee and a whole host of records by The Cure.
Tezzle
This is what would've happened if he never turned to the dark side. So it turns out he made the right call.
Mr.Roderick
Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
Julius_Goat
"Honestly at this point I just don't give a shit about those plans anymore."
WarrenGHarding
Somewhere between Episode III and Episode IV, Darth just... followed the Grateful Dead around for a while.
Joc1992
This is what happens when you have to live a good part of your life with the name "Anakin".
NightOwl26335
"Emperor, I must disagree ... this helmet will not convince anyone to come over to the dark side."
NightOwl26335
Darth does everything with a certain flare ... opening the closet door wide open was no exception.
NightOwl26335
Lucas just knew intuitively that the "I am your father" scene would not work with the pink helmet.
Valark
"The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of the shrooms."
Zuseswingman
At least I can see the signature so I can find the rest of this genieus's works
grafton
George Lucas' costume design for Episodes 7,8, and 9. And you thought the prequels sucked.
Rex-Jester
Annakin Skywalker had a few rough periods before he would fully stand by Palpatine, but arts and crafts pulled him through.
tylerrrodriguez
"Luke, I am your father." "No! No! That's impossible!" "I know, dude, I don't know how I gave birth to a talking dildo, either..."
iLoveMyMum
Luke, come to the dark side. We have super fucking awesome pink helmets dude!
infectionk
It may have been medicinal pot for his full-body burns, but he might have gone over the reccomended dosage.
IDontLikeChange
"What do you mean, Why can't you take me seriously anymore? I've simply made a personal life choice!"
VitaminD
What's the perfect gift someone who's a Star Wars fan, gay, and a smelly hippie? HELLO!
Priapism
The emperor made Darth SWEAR that he would never again enter a tattoo parlor after drinking.
MiltonSmith
Lord Vader didn't often talk about his year out before college on Tatooine, but one weed induced purchase would haunt him forever.
spydrmunkie
he starts dressing in all black and goes by his new emo name. realy who didn't see this coming?
jonnyt
Only now, seeing it in pink, do I realise that Darth Vader's head is the tip of a cock. Nice one, George.
Unept
Vader awoke to find The Emperor and his buddies gone, a black sharpie, a can of pink spray paint, and bottles of Endorr Brew littering the floor.
luckyb
This is actually just a prototype. They had to make an even gayier version that allowed for collar popping.
luckyb
Darth later had to cover up all his embarrassing tats from his early years on Haight Ashbury.
Ericeatsthekids
By the time Vader got out of high school the tattoos were so incomprehensible he just said "fuck it" and did his whole head.
Phoenix Trinidad
The Star Wars fans didn't take kindly to Bruno's take on their favourite movie.
Davyerit
With no exposed skin to tattoo, Vader was forced to make even poorer decisions when inebriated.
Mc_Hatin
After a ten year stint in San Quentin, Darth Vader came out a changed man. In appearance and sexuality.
DirkDaring99
The horrors of the Viet Nam war, combined with subsequent LSD abuse took a heavy toll on Sgt. Skywalker.
paquico
So that's why he said those things before!: "I find your lack of glamour disturbing." "You don't know the power of the rainbow side!" "Luke, I am your mother!."
BionicNinja
Sometimes, San Francisco circa 1969 really does feel like "a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away."
Mediatwin
"And now, your highness, we will discuss the location of your hidden rebel base...and which Broadway show I should see at the weekend..."
getittwistd
This piece of memorabilia from Darth's youth shows the angst that led him to the dark side.
Ometeotl
The slightly-less emo version of Darth Vader just wasn't as big a hit as George Lucas had imagined.
gypsy61
Palpatine, listen thanks for saving me, but I have some new ideas about my costume
buddywts
Doesn't matter how hard you think you are- you go strollin' through Brooklyn solo- you're gettin' tagged up....and beheaded.
getittwistd
Darth's long lost twin brother was somewhat less menacing, and slightly more annoying.
crazyivan
Vader did a stretch in State and had some awesome prison tats to show for it, though he usually covered them with shoe polish,
slarso
The fact that Vader didn't look like this in Episode III is proof that George Lucas hasn't COMPLETELY lost his mind.
IDontLikeChange
As he woke up from his stag-night, Darth realised that the rebels had a flair for design.
Pillzbury
Darth Vader had to do some things he wasn't too proud of in order to fund the death star
gypsy61
so the Jedi sperm is running away from two sadistic Sith sperm into death and pain. OK, makes sense
Priapism
George Lucas skipped over that whole episode when Darth Vader experimented with the gay side of the force.
The law even plays for dark jedi knights, NEVER pass out with your shoes on.
Tezzle
Where are those transmissions you intercepted? What have you done with those plans? Why the HELL do I taste colors!?
getittwistd
For his upcoming reality tv series, Darth was subjected to a makover to make him more relatable.
madman1
Little did anybody know, but Darth Vader was a seventh member of the Village People.
Brett-Butler
And who said that being a dark overlord and being fabulous weren't mutually exclusive?
crhino
(sob) well how would you feel if everyone always called you a shitty husband and father....
Julius_Goat
It's well known that Annakin Skywalker never recovered from his accident with acid.
Priapism
"I have all these voices in my head, but they never say anything, they just breath heavily and, I'm just sayin' it creeps me the fuck out!"
LCP
The last words of his advisers were: "We Have agreed that your new helmet is tacky" Then Vader chocked them all
IDontLikeChange
He cries juice; how did he lose to Luke! (He never even finished Jedi School).
crhino
(heavy breathing)...wait...is this an intervention ??? I am just trying to express myself !!
getittwistd
After the Emporer wouldn't let Darth go to the Jonas Brothers concert, things took a turn for the worse.
Priapism
Darth Vader actually knew Leia as a pre-teen, but after swiping his helmet one too many times during her "emo" years, he gave her up.
isles147
Like the first death star the original design for vaders helmet contained a small flaw
Unbeknownst
The computer generated image of what Michael Jackson would have looked like around 2025.
Julius_Goat
When the P-Funk mothership landed on the Death Star, Vader changed his name to Darth Funkenstein.
isles147
This vader uses his force skill to make you feel a strange sensation, not in the neck, in the ass
Volemak
Gay Darth Vader thought that becoming an emo would make his shallow society's rejection hurt less. He was wrong.
Ozweego
And you thought Jar Jar was a mistake! Wait until you meet Darth Vader's recluse daughter in-law who wears black nail polish and too much flannel!
Ozweego
Initially the props department didn't really understand what George Lucas meant when he spoke of Vader belonging to the Dark Side.
SazzyFrazz
In Darth's teenaged angst, he seemed to be stuck in the unchartered territory between the dark side and the light side of the force...the pink side
WarrenGHarding
Fraternity pranks on the Death Star usually ended badly. And with a very high body count.
HUMLY
I saw something like this done at a tattoo parlor once, but it was much smaller scale and looked EXTREMELY painful.
Pootivic
Remember, it doesn't matter who you are... you either make someone your bitch the first day in or you become someone else's bitch.
bananaco
Vader's life was never quite the same after a short stint endorsing Pepto Bismol.
spudsta87
Even in prison, the dark side misled vader down a dark and dismal path where it spat him back out as galactic prison bitch
WarrenGHarding
I don't like sand. It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is groovy and outtasight.
bloodydawn5522
in this phase, Vader went through many fake arms, always cutting the wrists with his lightsaber
mclovinit
"i was partying with the deathstar crew and i passed out, the next thing i knew im lokked like this"
Jefftildeath
In college, Darth Vader was artsy and had a few rough psychedelic experiences.
bloodydawn5522
"and he was all like, 'don't do it anakin, i have the high ground' and i was like 'bitch, i do what i want'"
Dude_Studley
Vaders attempt to force himself out of 9 movie contract with spielberg after having seen prequels. Rumors are spielbergs response will be to replace helmet with CGI anthropomorphic Orca in post production
NightOwl26335
The Gay Sci-Fi Con was indeed fabulous ... as evidenced by this darth prize
crjones
Darth Vader's younger brother Darth Emo led a slightly less successful life as the canvas for an aspiring tattoo artist.
NightOwl26335
Darth was determined not be underdressed the next time he visited the alien discoteque.
LDog
In all seriousness though the artist who made this should be fired out of a cannon into a brick wall.
LDog
Oh no you di'nt, Emperor Palpatine, I KNOW you ain't using your lightening hands on me, messin' up my $400 designer helmet and shit.
mjm07
Emperor Palpatine totally didn't believe Darth Vader's story about falling asleep in the chair while getting tattooed.
Stonesfan
Darth Vader was going to make sure he wasn't the first to fall asleep at a sleepover ever again.
vilculiao
A movie you SHOULD miss: "You've got 10 things i hate about the wedding planner maid in manhattan Sex & the city a cinderella story Wars".starring Hugh Grant, Julia Roberts, J-Lo, J-lo's Ass, Hillary Duff & Sarah Jessica Parker as Darth Gayder.
RyanPress
Darth Vader saw the designs in the window, and then he knew that he had to get some ink.
CaptionDatAss
"Sir, the Death Star's gaydar is picking up something HUGE. It appears to be some FLAMING wreckage."
mrziggy_josh
Darth Perez only realized that he was having a bad trip after some smart ass Nerf Hearder made an announcement about eating the brown acid.
CaptionDatAss
Never fall asleep at a Sith house party, 'cause some dick with a Sharpie might draw on your face and then dump Pepto-Bismol all over you.
bastardo
"I swear man, I put my dollar in the gumball machine and this is what what the fuck it gave me"
ShawnStu
12 oz. can of pink spray paint $3.59 black sharpie $2.99 shaming Vader when he passes out at the death star launch party...priceless. sigh. I miss 2003.
ShawnStu
I've been waiting for you, Obi-wan. We meet again at last. The circle is now complete. When I left you I was but the learner. Now I am the fagmaster.
mccrackenskeet
Once the girls get a glimpse of this condom, nerds will be having even less sex.
Exsanguinated
Little did Anakin realize the "Dark Side Bar" required some very "Emo" attire.
Artichoke
Lyke, OMG! My boyfriend is SO into starwars and he has this lyke, stupid toy thingy. So I totally punked him!
panbient
You really thought George Lucas was done 're-imagining' Star Wars after part 3? Wait until the Ewoks come back in a decade.
jcarl
The Imperial Theater Light Opera Company presents "Hair" staring Darth Vader as George Berger.
IPooonyu
Ken (from Barbie) finally gets a accessory to show his manhood, in his own way.
rclandrum
My sister is a biker babe, She hails from south LA, All da bro's run screamin', When she comes out to play.
rahru
That's how you will look if you are bitch-slapped by the Dark Side while listening to Sgt. Pepper's.
MC_Rap
Little known Palpatine fact: Huge practical joker as seen with his initial construction of Vader's suit
MC_Rap
"whoa man..you notice ever since Vader converted his helmet to a bong, he's been way cooler, man?"
MC_Rap
The Emperor hated Vader's "alternative" lifestyle. "Darth Maul would never have embarrassed me like this!" he would often exclaim
MC_Rap
Penis. Man-ass. Daisy Trains. A jedi craves not these things. Paths to the dark side they are.
MC_Rap
"Um, first off I didn't say doodle, and that's not what I meant when I said "diddle my pink helmet""
niko4ever
Although Luke inevitably followed in his father's footsteps, it wasn't quite the way Darth had pictured it.
CountTyler
Star Wars Episode 12: Lea turns to the the dark side due to an unfortunate affair with Luke.
troutslap
an angsy young Vader after jamming with his band, Imperial Park, wrote the song "Crawling in my suit...these burns they will not heal"
dimlightbulb
Hopefully, one day, my house will be able to puke on my neighbors.....bastards
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