Zaphod
no, you're supposed to put the WHORES in the front window of the red-light district!!!
verglas
All the king's horses and all the king's men? Are you kidding me? No wonder they couldn't put Humpty together again. Just what did those idiots expect the horses to do, anyway?
Leaf
"Mr. Reeve, I don't think you want to ride that horse" .... but it was too late....
geniuswaitress
"Maybe we shouldn't have buried Seabiscuit in that creepy pet cemetary."
Leaf
Mick Jagger was forced to concede that there were, in fact, some wild horses that could tear him away.
DaygosDankest
This shit is stupid, whoever comes up with a half witty comment at exactly 12 pacific time gets votes. When really there are about 200 better ones than the one that is currently leading. This is especially true today.
steeze_bucket
Don't make Sarah Jessica Parker angry. You wouldn't like Sarah Jessica Parker when she's angry.
Zaphod
The accumulated filth of all their sex and murder will foam up about their waists and all the whores and politicians will look up and shout "Save us!"... and I'll whisper "neigh."
Julius_Goat
For obvious reasons Pissfucker Stinkeye was a long-shot to win at Preakness.
somfas
I swear to God!!!! the next person that calls me Sarah Jessica Parker is a DEAD MAN!
verglas
Coming Winter of 2012; Mr. Ed isn't going to take your SHIT.. anymore.. Time to die..
Priapism
Next time you "beat a dead horse", make sure its dead first, otherwise expect repercussions.
Julius_Goat
The mob never put this horse's head in anybody's bed, that much I promise you.
Wanderer
Barbaro, surprising his many fans, did NOT end up in heaven after his unfortunate Kentucky Derby demise.
nimo
Man, I love owning a glue company! And being a jockey. Too bad my horse broke its leg. Who wants to play horseshoes? What? What do you mean that horse is looking at me?
nimo
Somebody get the Horse Whisperer. Mr. Ed's got that killing look in his eyes again.
geniuswaitress
"I am NOT too drunk to ride this horse...I mean these horses...I mean this horse."
CavalierX
...and then, one dark night, Mr. Ed decided he'd had enough pretending to be a dumb animal.
scaryed
God damn it John you sick bastard! If you are going to give the plastic horse a facial at least clean it up after!
Todzilla
I know what you're thinking, did you put six spurs on that cowboy boot or only five? So you gotta ask yourself one question....
Versus
Children visiting this museum always ask their parents why the horse's name is 'Facial'.
jmiland1
Why did we make a movie called "Murder On The Merry-Go-Round"? What were we thinking? Keanu Reeves as a killer horse? This is a terrible idea!
mama1974
Wilber liked Mr. Ed well enough but sometimes he yearned for Thunder the Wonder horse...
Swampwater
A horse is a horse of course, of course, unless that horse will EAT YOUR SOUL.
Leaf
Sometimes I like the idea of being a horse-whisperer... sometimes it just seems like a really bad idea...
jekelish
Late in his life, Seattle Slew was forced to resort to starring in donkey shows in order to pay the bills.
geniuswaitress
Scary dogs, kids, trucks, and cell phones. What WILL Stephen King come up with next?
controlfreak777
I horse that projects a perfect shadow of American Dad and his chin? Excellent Wilbur!!
Leaf
"Mr. Reeves, I don't think you want to ride that horse" .... but it was too late....
MC_Rap
So then he said, "Fuck you and the horse you rode in on!" The horse was not amused
bilbo1
Um, no sir I don't know who put your girlfriend in a bikini last week, but I'm deeply sorry for it.
benrichardsrm
I can't help but wonder how many Sarah Jessica Parker jokes this picture will inspire.
heman1kid
For some girls getting a pony is their dream for others it is their worst night-"mare".
Priapism
Unfortunately, a "horse caught in the headlights" isn't the same as a deer - it just gets pissed off and analy rapes you.
quagmyre
Twenty minutes later, feeling fear of an equine with a red lightbulb, the French surrendered.
lynn_k_fletcher
She looked deep into Black Beauty's eyes and saw the fire that burned there. She took three steps back and then cantered away at a brisk trot, disturbed by what she had seen.
anarcurt
Pokey has refused to speak with Gumby ever since that time in Tijuana with the Blockheads.
Exodiafinder687
A horse is a horse of course of course. Unless that horse is a freaking devil horse out to steal your soul.
Rex-Jester
Sure it's a nice statue and all, but I said I wanted to see the whore's house.
Rex-Jester
David Caruso, I know it is you behind the mirrored glass. I will be out on bail before you can remove your sunglasses and say "oh yeah, mane man is goin' down." Then, I will be coming for you. Sleep tight.
geniuswaitress
The overuse of the Sarah Jessica Parker jokes have finally pissed off the horse.
hadleydb
A rage filled Daisy's heart... She was never the same after Kirstie Alley road her.
Slainetara
I have this recurring dream where i'm on the internet and then this red..........oh........oh i see.....
WarrenGHarding
Police across the nation put up flyers for the notorious bankrobber, Bonnie N. Clydesdale.
BennyF
"Poor old Billy, he must have tripped and broken his neck!" muttered the other jockeys as they stood over the mangled corpse. If only they'd glanced over at the window where Buttercup stood looking in, watching, waiting. Their time would come - soon.
echelon42
But the tragedy struck as Mr. Ed, out of money and strung out on coke, turned to prostitution in Amsterdam.
Unbeknownst
What's the big deal? It's just an evil-looking see-through horse from hell...aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
CaptainGeoffrey
"Dude... are you alright? Why are you looking at me so weird? I thought you said you have taken this stuff before!"
ducttape36
museum horse may be watching me masturbate, but that didnt stop me from blowing it all over his face.
Diasdiem
Signs of an amateur photographer: 1.) Being able to see yourself in the reflection 2.) Taking a photo of a fake horse for no apparent reason.
Rex-Jester
Nice reflection of the camera... don't really like the ring you're wearing, though.
KillerPaintCan
There was a horse. His name was Bob. Someone tried to pet Bob. Someone's intenstines were later spilled. Haha.
Obtusetriangle
Man, it was so much better when we called him Charlie, and he had a horn, and he was pink.
crazyivan
Do not touch the glass. Do not approach the glass. You pass him nothing but soft paper - no pencils or pens. No staples or paperclips in his paper. Use the sliding food carrier, no exceptions. If he attempts to pass you anything, do not accept it. Do
somfas
I swear to God, the next person that makes a Sarah Jessica Parker joke is a DEAD MAN!
papajon0s1
Red Fury pondered the many ways he could get rid of those Busweiser Clydesdales. "Oh, they'll pay," he thought, "they'll pay..."
Dunstin Checks Out
As the client finished on her forehead, she was just glad it wasn't in her mane.
Panic
"No, see the point was to take a picture of my reflection, which you can kind of see... But I suppose the horse is a bit more noticeable."
edanman99
"You know you can never return home after what you did." "I wasn't gonna go back...I still have a score to settle with some horny jockeys."
RandyChimp
Psychic Horse used his mind powers to seek out his arch nemesis, "The Stableboy"
dot26
"Yes, take my picture you infidel, but my day of reckoning will soon come, and when it does, there will be hell to pay!"
CarlSpackler
Look honey! Its the girl from that silly show on HBO!...What's her name again, oh yea Samantha thats it!
grumnut1
Even though they've expanded my barn to a square kilometre, I STILL haven't had the Jacuzzi installed.
buddywts
I don't think he took that "Your mother's a Zebra-lover" comment too well, let's just get outta here while we still can.....
ruckdodgers
emotions ran high... "How could he have said that?!!" I know. I know exactly what to do...
classie
This failed attempt at art is the only known photo of notorious equine felon Rancid the Devil Pony.
OvaltinePatrol
An accidental flip of the light switch revealed the identity of the police informant...
Keithmeister
Red-horse-type-devil (AKA Starfire, 12th place getter in the lesser known derby, Desperation) was happy with his new posting as Satan's right hand man
deathbyjohnny
"Oh everyone remembers Black Beauty.. but did I ever tell you the story of Red Rapist?"
deathbyjohnny
Ever wondered what Epona did in those 7 years between young link and adult link? Theres a lot of money in Amsterdam.
feralboy12
Oh I can't think of anything I'm choking dammit my dick my balls sorry I lose
Wanderer
Wait. I thought a WHITE horse ushered in the Apocalypse. Could we get a check on that?
MC_Rap
Silver had no idea what to expect when he went to the Donkey show. He was not amused
Rex_Cogidubnus
If HE kiked a paparazzi in the balls, he wouldn't still be standing. I'm looking at you HUGH...
Zounds!
"My Little Pony" grew up to become a gay male super-model...can't say that I'm surprised.
Jonny5
That bastard horse never came when I whistled: The Lone Ranger's reason for stuffing Silver.
getittwistd
Win the race he says, breed all you want he says! He pimps me out like whore now! Do you hear me! A whore!
dubiousmx
After a long, drawn out gun fight, Mr. Ed's reign of terror was brought to end with his incarceration.
Unsaturated15
Rural attempts at red-light districts rarely feature the correct pronunciation of "whores."
kerbinsour
It was disqualified from the Kentucky Derby on suspicion of using Horsie Growth Hormone
inmate42392
What's really interesting about this picture is the reflections... I mean, what house is that? And who is the person taking a picture? Fuck the horse, man...
DaygosDankest
Jerry Seinfeld's Animality was a huge letdown in MK vs. Sitcoms. But George's CoCo was rad.
getittwistd
The Horse Whisperer The Movie: We screamin' now Jennifer, we be screamin' bitch!
liverpooljohnny
Well sir, she's mad about the bestiality alright. Thing is, I kinda like her when she's angry.
Ozweego
So horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" hahahahah....I kill myself
gitsum
Wouldn't you be pissed off too, if you had to carry a 45 pound midget on your back for a mile and a half...
getittwistd
What if someone said "That's so horse!" What if everyone said it! Don't say things are gay! Knock it off! ..or whatever...
lovethepowder
Am I the only one who's more scared of the creepy alien people in the backround?
josancho
Fifteen minutes later, the French fell for the Trojan horse stragem and surrendered.
getittwistd
Hmmph! I was supposed to be next to a Gorilla exhibit, not these dirty cubans!
CaptionDatAss
"I'm feeling a little hoarse, mommy." said Timmy. As his mother reached over to give him a cough drop, she noticed he was touching the pony's penis.
CaptionDatAss
Why'd the unemployed man visit the horse barn? He was looking for a stable job!
gitsum
Have you ever had your ass kicked by a stallion...there a first time for everything!
crhino
Yeah I get it...you are looking for a piece of "ass". I heard you the first time.....
quagmyre
We all watched the beautiful red glow of the rotisserie and wondered how much longer till Mom's Famous Horse Roast would be ready for dinner.
Rex-Jester
He's been yelling for help through the sound proof glass all day, and now he's hoarse.
TheUnitedEmpire
Horses in New York just don't tie up outside without letting you know they are non too fucking pleased about it
Komicbomb
The glue industry finally honors those that have fallen in the fight to bring them fame and fortune...
MC_Rap
Silver emerged in front of the Elmer's Factory and a slow rage began to boil..."It's horses! Elmer's Glue is made out of horses! They're making our glue out of horses!"
jaynine
This hosre has the Eye of the Tiger, rising up to the challenge of all rivals. Watch out Mr. T.
Joey_09876
Look, I'm sorry I had to put down your wife because of her broken leg. If you want, to make it even, you can take my wife!
Gorilla1226
Frank is a method actor...it's hard to see...but there is a bottle of Elmer's right behind the cameraman.
Spajo
Retired Disney characters are forced to live out their unhappy lives in glass boxes.
MC_Rap
...and the Yo Mama joke was the last thing Robert Redford ever whispered in any horse's ear
CaptionDatAss
"Cleveland Steamers are NOTHING compared to Filly Steamers, believe me!!!"
ferron
Few knew Mr. Ed ended up in hell but, then again, they didn't know about his teenage days in Tijuana.
CaptionDatAss
And now for the Mane Event, the Ultimate Farrier takes on Stone Colt Steve Austin!
Stonecrow
Who's brilliant idea was it to double expose a picture of a horse with a buiding? Please, drop out of art school!
CaptionDatAss
The horse mafia leaves a human head in your stable when they want to send a message.
MC_Rap
The horse was in s state of shock. He lost his life savings when the Colts didn't cover
nimo
Nice horsey? I can smell my brother on the glue you dropped on my forehead. Oh yes, nice horsey. Let's go out for a ride.
babs
Bad Horse, Bad Horse Bad Horse, Bad Horse He rides across the nation, the thoroughbred of sin He got the application that you just sent in It needs evaluation, so let the games begin A heinous crime, a show of force (a murder would be nice of c
CaptionDatAss
"Yeah, she's got a horse face, but she's the best damn Secretariat this office has ever had!"
MC_Rap
once again stage fright gets the best of Crimson. When the spot light came on he just froze
OSUmigl84
Attention race horse owners: You euthanize a horse, they will come back and haunt the fuck out of you
Roland_Deschain
Hmm, don't know that face. Show me his dick, maybe I'll recognize him from 4chan.
CaptionDatAss
Just when you thought it couldn't get any worse for the Elephant Man, the woman he married had a horse face and camel toe.
CMDRReservoir
All little Cindy wanted was a picture of the horsey. She payed with her life...
spoochy
this is the one day of the year I face my inner demons, snap a pick, rodeo ride them to submission, then sell them for glue.
Dunstin Checks Out
As the gamblers left with their winnings, he knew he earn them and soon they would be his again.
AlucardJones
I know this isn't a big deal to anyone but I gotta say it, I just lost my virginity.
macdaddy41
Disney is going to be pissed when they find out Spirit stole all the opium again.
slarso
The next brooding film remake of a campy 60's television show: "Mr. Ed: UNSTABLE" Coming Summer 2010!
mydeek
"like what you see? yeah, I bet you do! what do you say? c'mon let's do this! I'll rock your fucking world baby!"
pepesupreme
Yes, do enjoy your little party. Tonight,I shall have the pleasure of having YOU for dinner.
eastcoastghost
The tour of the Alpo dog food plant was more depressing than anticipated.
Leaf
'Don't put the cart before the horse'... The horse really doesn't like it when you do that.
EaterOfClowns
Amazingly, it's hard to tell which glare in this photo is more pronounced.
Dlapps91
The demonic horse stare wasnt quite as popular as the dramatic prairie dog video
DangerousBob
North Korean horses are much different then the patriotic cowboy type ones we have here in Texas.
limphy
you guys know the horse is just a distraction from the guy in the bottom right kneeling with a huge boner, right?
Spunk
Just then Sally looked up in horror at what was causing the shadow and realized what was about to...
Rower
The two tiny men went though the rightside entrance, but as soon as they arrived onto their very quickly chosen transport, they regretted it - In the brochure "Big-red-angry-ghost-horse" had sounded cool and appealing... it was neither.
khutche
Horse named Pansy brutually mutilates Daniel Radcliffe after final Broadway showing of Equis
rubrduckee
What they don't know is this is a very strong mans arm with a horse puppet on the end of it
mhtsos
Here you can see a horse under the effect of lsd watching me...Or maybe the opposite i don't know...
Hallo457
After being rejected by the Budweiser Clydesdales, Jim was pissed to hear the donkey made it.
mrjoebert
After his show went under in the 80s, Mr. Ed was forced to resort to beastiality shows in seedy red light district clubs
dot.com
http://seanmckeown.deviantart.com/art/stonehenge-dominos-117261811 http://seanmckeown.deviantart.com/art/osama-bin-hidin-in-a-cake-117263023 http://seanmckeown.deviantart.com/art/eddie-adams-wrong-117261956
NightOwl26335
"You may color me red and ride me fast but in the end I can still piss on you like a race horse."
NightOwl26335
Yea, Oprah's horse was seeing red and in a foul mood, but exactly why shouldn't he be?
87gn
All the special stage lighting and Hollywood makeup can't keep Prince Charles from being recognized everywhere he goes.
Macabe
Mr. Ed suffered an embarrassing fate. Let us just say that Carradine was hung like a horse.
smashhulksmash
Hunter S. Thomspon reincarnated. Fear and Loathing In Las Vegas 2: Electric Boogaloo.
pbunyan568
Deleted scene from the Animal Farm movie: "It puts the fucking lotion in the basket!!"
troutism
"And that son, is what we used to call a horse. They were used for farming and transportation. And you could fuck them."
fuegito1
Equius 2's promo team decided to appeal to a more specific demographic. (read: satan)
NefariousWalrus
"I don't give a shit if Marlon Brando is in it...I'm not playing a severed head," Mr Ed said bitterly to his talent agent, "I'm and actor not a piece of meat!"
NefariousWalrus
"I don't give a fuck if Marlon Brando is in it...I'm not playing a severed head," said Mr. Ed bitterly to his talent agent, "I'm an actor not a piece of meat!"
H1tman007
Sarah Jessica Parker took her role in Sex in The City:Amsterdam a bit too seriously
Hnodri
oh you said bad horse? I thought you told me to grab something that looks like your daughter.
AppleScraps
You know, this kinda shit is what makes museums for the elderly and kids with morbidly obese parents.
Fat_John
now avalible for a limited time only, from the My Little Pony Collection comes Schizophrenia Pony. Get them while supplies last.
natejeezy
sex dolls for sale, and for a limited time, complete your dark fantasies you sick bastard.
Antonio_B
Now, I want you to go in that bag and find my wallet...it's the one that says "Bad Motherfucker"
dietcokeofevil
He rides across the nation, the thoroughbred of sin He got the application that you just mailed in...
cliffs_notes
Not many people know about Mr. Ed's not so proud "services" after television.
Jaded-E
The 5th horse of the Apocalypse,accusatory stare pony was rejected for obvious reasons.
sortableturnip
You would look like this too if you had to stare out a fucking window all day!
CrimsonHayes
Through the window, the Lone Ranger saw his fate. Hi Yo silver had returned. And this time it was for blood
lighter
Jeeves, Please fetch my riding steed for the "Get to know your Neighbors Ball". We shall have a splendid time eh wot?
November 2009
October 2009
September 2009
August 2009
July 2009
June 2009
Copyright © 2005 - 2009 Cracked Entertainment, Inc. All rights reserved. CRACKED, CRACKED.COM and the "CRACKED" logo are trademarks owned by Cracked Entertainment, Inc. All rights reserved.
Nov 21st, 2009 
Nov 20th, 2009 
Nov 19th, 2009 
Nov 18th, 2009 
Nov 17th, 2009 
Nov 16th, 2009 
Nov 15th, 2009 
Nov 14th, 2009 
Nov 13th, 2009 
Nov 12th, 2009 
Nov 11th, 2009 
Nov 10th, 2009 
Nov 9th, 2009 
Nov 8th, 2009 
Nov 7th, 2009 
Nov 6th, 2009 
Nov 5th, 2009 
Nov 4th, 2009 
Nov 3rd, 2009 
Nov 2nd, 2009 
Oct 31st, 2009 
Oct 30th, 2009 
Oct 29th, 2009 
Oct 28th, 2009 
Oct 27th, 2009 
Oct 26th, 2009 
Oct 25th, 2009 
Oct 24th, 2009 
Oct 23rd, 2009 
Oct 22nd, 2009 
Oct 21st, 2009 
jtklove 
GaseousClay 
FedEXguy 
JobiSierra14 
ChaseMitchell 
psu 
Blinker_Fluid 
jmble 
Truthiness 
tomjenkins 
HUMLY 
Cap 
LDMEXICO 
Bluth 
spydrmunkie 
Milkman 
ToasterCat 
Nift 
BVincent 
picc01 
Doomsauce 
cha0sunity 
Bagelfish 
CarChaseCityMan 
Purple-Dino 
imacipod 
cptnpeacocksuit 
HarveyWright 
slickjamesjik 
D.Ray 
TheDrRipper 
shogun1204 
Roscoe 
Styre 
Gatt 
bubblebrain 
Fkelleghan 
BurgerMeister 
DeathXP 
dazam 
empleryEntrance 
wqlk3 
loborepaz 
bit 
InSovietRussia 
gamadaya 
MarleyIII 
1.21jigawatt 
GoblinQueen 
LadyAnarook 
Bobby Bobby 
gypsy61 
dirtyhippie007 
ShawnStu 
JewDude 
happydude 
redstripe11 
lumberjef 
iamoldgregg 
satur92002 
Rawrsaurus_Rex 
Newsatan 
soda26 
Chloroform 
Tesuansey 
KAJER 
ColonelLazers 
Gabo 
MikeRotch 
improvcomedy14 
connan 
pelcurus 
BillWilliams 
Kyotay2001 
Jessweeee 
pea 
mickmarch 
Muscely_Arms 
Tripster2001 
Deimos 
stech369 
leicester 
khendler 
MGSku 
SamuraiZach0 
bafaulkner 
KungFuBigBoss 
FourFinger 
captainHamsack 
Gentle_Dementia 
barnett 
djashish 
pjunk 
Mordor 
dankwad 
dmophatty 
ohbuttermyarse 
iamworden 
Ben861 
Downtheline 
dash7 
dozeritusi 
tterry 
an_ton 
Ranger 
Mediatwin 
Henky 
neathy 
Boxy 
ShadyPelican 
jen-n-juice 
Tengrain 
satanya 
Cookie. 
dar00ts90 
