Other Craptions

"Did you press the Wong button?"

This caption is dongtacular.

Not the most subtle way to learn someone's pin number, but whatever works.

Well, there's your problem right there. Your penis is caught in the slot.

I'd like to talk to you about Scientology...

In Japan if you get the top score, you become part of the video game.

What a helpful feature! Now I can punch a Chinaman when this machine frustrates me.

No one can see the Emperor, not no way no how!

japans most advanced glory hole

SUPPLIES!

Lao!! It's yourself from the future!! Don't put your wang in the teller machine!!

Missuh Wizard of OZ, he no in! You reave message?

The first version of the Sexbot 3000 wasn't without it's glitches.

you want bro-job?

"Fucked up machine. My change was supposed to be two torsos and a finger."

Yes, the Japanese have robot pets and children, but live person vending machines. Go figure.

"...you misspelled 'paranoid'..."

Whatcha watching? Tentacle porn. Cool.

Remember the night you got drunk and humped an ATM? I'm your son.

No. It's UP UP DOWN DOWN LEFT RIGHT LEFT RIGHT B A.

That's right, now pull the lever...yeah just like that. Slower...slower.

and for his 2nd wish, he took back the one about being the worlds greatest sex machine.

THESE ATMS ARE MADE OF PEOPLE!!!! PEOPLE!!!!!

Wong wasn't the most sophisticated identity thief.

You selected 40-year old male, proceed to step 7.

Skynet becomes self-aware, the Japanese barely notice.

2000 bank accounts were emptied over the weekend; obviously the work of a criminal genius!

They really will make a gameshow out of anything over there.

Though it took him 8 months, a personal loan and the loss of his marriage, it was all worth it when Ed won best costume at the office's Halloween party.

i believe that puts wong at a 6.5

Vend-A-Head. Only in Japan.

Who dares disturb my slumber!

'www dot cracked... yeah dot com... yeah then click on craptions... see there I am!'

The Japanese have vending machines for everything. I've heard they even have a new one that will give you head.

One might say hes "A-Head" in the job market!

I've heard the stereotype about Japanese men being "small", but it must be pretty bad when even the urinal stops to look and laugh at you.

"Hey, I'm still using this suicide booth. Wait your turn, buddy."

Yeah, from where I'm standing, it DOES look infected.

I see you made an error in your deposit.

No, no, NO!! This is a business transaction......... I need the little Jewish guy....

tech support in japan is much more personal.

It looks like you're writing a letter. Would you like help?

"What the fuck? Which button gets me a Diet Coke?"

Allow me to assist you with this transaction, and remember... Tipping isn't just the city we live in.

Exact change, asswipe!

Oh Hewo Pwease!

Oh great, one of those talking ATMs.

No offence to automated tellers - Japanese people are just better at math...

You sank my battleship!