Other Craptions

Steve knew that no amount of aloe was gonna relieve THIS sunburn.

I see London, I see France, I see... OH MY GOD!!!

"Those Scottish ceremonial kilts are SOOOO gay," thought the French honor guard.

Dear Cracked, I have some serious concerns about your Titties to Man-Ass ratio. That is all.

Ironically, Butt Pirates actual did exist.

Too bad that Frenchman's sword will never see the battlefield...if you know what I mean.

So far, no jokes about Cracked... that's kind of a let down...

Is that a loaf of bread in thy codpiece, or art thou just happy to see me?

After the third musketeer left, things just got awkward between the two.

My, that is a mighty blade, sir!

Eyes up here, dude...eyes up here.

Uh, Frank? Those aren't exactly one size fits all.

"Hey dude, you might want to say no to crack, if you catch my drift."

No wonder the french army always falls in 30 seconds the first 25 seconds is just the other army thinking "what the fuck?"

No one had much trouble identifying the Rear Admiral.

Contrary to popular opinion, it was actually the Latvian army that brought sexy back.

Beware, sir! Fanny bandits!

Wait...what kind of sword fight were you talking about?

Whoever can pull this wedgie from my Knight shall be the King of England!

Veni, Vidi, Vici, V.D.

It's customary before a duel for each participant to show their balls

This dude puts the "Camel" in Camelot.

Robin Hood and the Men With No Tights

"No Frank, I don't think they make you look fat."

What makes this worse is that this army traveled exclusively on bicycle.

The great thing about Kegels is that you can do them anytime.

"You wanna walk my plank?"

Admittedly, the "Don't ask, Don't tell" rule doesn't work for every army.

"Dude, you look ridiculous in those boots."

Oh sure, it's all fun and games until somebody gets a yeast infection.

Young Dimitri quivered with fear, knowing full well that farting before a superior officer carried the death penalty.

"Need a pair of pants Bill?" "No thanks, I'm trying to quit."

OH LOOK A WAGON.

Cracked became a gay website so gradually that I didn’t notice it

Why Corporal Smitty...I had no idea you were Jewish.

"You gotta ask yourself...'do I feel comfortable?' Well? Do ya, queer?"

A mixture of The Patriot, The Shawshank Redemption and the most horrifyingly terrible nightmare ever.

Sergeant Sweetass, reporting for booty, sir.

I feel bad for whoever has to do his laundry.

You're going to feel a little prick

You know how I know you're gay?

"You cheeky bastard" he wrote. We snickered in disbelief. Again we failed to see the humor in the winning craption

Why is it there are never any women on Cratpions?

The Scotsmen were relieved to see that their kilts were NOT the gayest outfit at the European Guard Convention this year.

"Dude, stop staring. Stop Staring!" "I can't look away!"

Ah yes, the no handed salute!

anybody else whack off to this shit ?

Henri stood very, very still, while the last of the paint dried. Then La Resistance was on.

Go on! Take a crack!