Amer
There was a farmer who had a dog and 0100001001001001010011100100011101001111 was his name-o.
FreddyGx2
Finally the truth about Old Yeller. He wasn't Rabid, he just ran on Windows.
Blinker_Fluid
Looks like they're going to have to take him out in the woods and wipe his hard drive.
Oops
"Mommy can we keep him???" "No sweety. There's probably going to be a newer model out next week."
hvymtalmachine
Although not as accurate, the Museum of Unnatural History was far more interesting.
gm_zero
"We heard you like to play xbox and bring your dog in the car with you, dawg. So we put an xbox in yo dog, so you and yo dog and xbox while you drive yo dog and drive, dawg."
SamLowery
With the economy getting tough, more and more people are bringing their sick pets to Geek Squad instead of a veterinarian. The results are cruel, but admittedly much cheaper.
Krathoon
When the kids were in his corn field again, farmer Jeb switched his dog to the "Kamikaze" setting.
hvymtalmachine
Well, see, there's your problem. You don't have a computer, you have a dog.
Actionopoly
They tried to kill him. He wouldn't stay dead. "Old Yeller 2: The Reckoning"
Cleaverson
"Robo-puppy commencing 1 hour yipping session." "Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip!
siromar
"Well, I know its kind of far fetched, but Christian Bale's Fight with the Woof-800 really made the film for me."
hvymtalmachine
Cindy became a cat person because she found dogs' wiring to be too complex.
djseifer
Though the dogs howled and cheered at their newest technology, the cats simply waited and bided their time, knowing that the dogs had forgotten to take Y2K into consideration.
hvymtalmachine
After considering Christian Bale's last freak-out on the set, the crew of "Terminator" decided to leave its next prank on the shelf for awhile.
Bell110
"I swear Mrs. Johnson, my dog ate my homework... BEFORE I had a chance to print it out."
ray18
Sick of lying to Billy about the dog living on a farm, Ted sought another solution.
Blinker_Fluid
Scandal rocked the Westminster dog show when it was revealed that Best in Show winner, Loldog, is a cyborg.
Mr.Bigglesworth
The taxidermist ran a side business, but nobody wanted a stuffed dog that pissed on the carpet periodically
magicalpants
This is where Milton Bradley hid his first attempt at Battleship, he was later quoted as saying "Fuck it, plastic piece of shit it is."
slammy4000
recalled puppy: answers to the name of vista. we think he downloaded a virus although he couldnt find anything when he needed it before any way. fyi doesnt play well with older versions and will often bite the hand that feeds. (no reward)
Jenna_Tullwortz
Yeah, well everything was fine until he picked up some worm that made him start dragging his ass on the carpet. The static charge fried the mainboard and don't even ask where the power supply is...
Alndan
"As the shotgun smoke cleared, the boy was startled to see his beloved Old Yeller was actually a Terminator"
gm_zero
"You still don't get it, do you? He'll find her! That's what he does! It's *all* he does! You can't stop him! He'll wait for you! He'll reach down her throat and tear her fuckin' heart out!"
DarkMatter
Apple's new technological breakthrough, the IPup, much like their IPod, looks great,costs a lot, and takes a crap all the time.
jessen
"And here we have our latest model, the SE48-X. It's the ultimate in seeing-eye dog technology, perfect for people who are really, really blind."
Sergeant_Basil
The Third time one of John's pets came back like this after a surgery, he started to get suspicious...
Blinker_Fluid
We can rebuild him. We have the technology. Can we get rid of the wet dog smell? Um no, we didn't have any money left in the budget for Febreze.
TheBeatles
This dog's bark is worse than it's byte. Get it, computer bytes? Ah, screw you guys!
manager12390
Jimmy finally got his Christmas wish of a pet who would never have to be sent to the farm.
Happy Emo
Now here's your problem ma'am the reason this thing killed your husband is because its sentience switch isn't set to its default setting of "Lassie". It appears to be stuck between "Drug hound" and "Cujo"
drifter1717
Despite this highly advanced technology, there is still no button to keep him from shitting in your slippers.
CreepyOldMan
He is singly responsible for all this high tech shit.... GET IT?!?! HIGH. TECH. SHIIIIT?? How do I do it?
firefly415
Proof that no dog could be that good, Lassis declassified as an extraterrestrial
Boondoggle
Scene from Disney's next Kid friendly film, "Air Bud: Destroyer of Humanity".
Actionopoly
And although cyber-pup 8200 barked happily, the look in his eyes said "Why was I made?"
Caliostro
YO DAWG, WE HERD YOU LIKE ROBOTS, SO WE KILLED YOU AND TURNED YOU INTO A CYBORG! HOLA!
mangoman78
"And our newest model, for people who like loud music and ridiculous amounts of responsibility."
speedRazor
This is not a Portuguese Water Dog Mr. Obama, in fact keep water away from it.
facebace
Adjusted for inflation, this is really all that 6 million dollars can get you these days.
WLTwitch
If I had a dollar for every time I installed a Pentium chip into a stray dog, I'd be a millionaire.
LordOfTheDance
And I thought dogmatic meant asserting opinions in a doctrinaire or arrogant manner.
WLTwitch
It doesn't matter how a dog looks on the outside cuz they-HOLY FUCK! WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!?
CloseLight
Next week on the Sarah Connor Chronicles - Skynet unleashes it most...uhh never mind, no one is watching.
leftbehind
Rex Austin, lapdog. A dog barely alive. Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. We have the technology and we can show it off with a cool side flap!
Alexisbest
Thats all well and good, but playing fetch isn't as fun when the dog can use guidance software to locate the ball rather than running around like a blinded idiot.
heartgrenade12
We can rebuild him. we have the technology. but I'm not saying it won't be fucked up.
jonnygonzo
The TX-k9 was sent back in time to prevent the creation of Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines, regrettably it failed miserably.
BennettTheSage
Seems like a good idea now, but if you thought urine stains on the couch were bad, try getting out oil stains.
pope22
When Disney bought the rights to the Terminator series, we were worried. When we learned they were remaking Judgement Day and Homeward Bound, we were scared shitless....we had good reason.
Superpsyke62
In the long war of terror, the United States has finally developed the ultimate weapon...adorable robotic suicidal lassy cyborgs.
jonnygonzo
Introducing Cyberdine's newest model! (warning, may chew on furniture, piss gasoline, and kill Sara Conner)
tlittlim
Gentledogs, we can rebuild him. We have the technology. We have the capability to make the world's first bionic dog. Fido Austin will be that dog. Na na na na, na na na na na na na na...
Truthiness
The Six Million Dollar Dog: We can rebuild him, we can make him bigger, stronger, and faster.
(w)afflehouse
Old Yeller wasn't too happy when Travis killed him...now he's back, and better than ever.
quilak
Old Yeller is dead. Men we can rebuild him. Make him stronger, faster, better then he was before.
Krathoon
Just after building it, the Doctor realized the K-9 Mark XX was just way too creepy.
Krathoon
The dog is great, but the warranty does not cover all the stuff it breaks from it's robo-humping.
smoochy
Yes, I'd like him re-programmed to stop fukkin my cat. At least during the Holidays when my relatives are here.
genevieve
Get Fido 2.0! Comes with all the features of Fido 1.5, plus a bonus "Pee On Annoying People" command.
Minnis
"We're sorry sir. We've solved the bagging problem. But without adding thumbs we can't get them to work the lighters,"
amaru
"its my new dildo. its inconspicuously shaped like a dog. its tail, however, might give it away."
Mister.Brown
We can do it. We have the technology to make Old Yeller better...faster...stronger!
ScottMon
The taxidermist thought he hit on a great idea, animatronics for your beloved pet...
ilicksquirrels
Sadly, Michael Vick was arrested before he could debut his allegedly unbeatable dog.
greatmilenko07
"Woof Woof" "What is it boy?" "WOOF" Oh you mean Sky Net has become self-aware and will soon begin to destroy humans
Bluth
The new model of robo-dog is more realistic and a hell of a lot creepier than the old ones.
pea
Warning, no user serviceable parts inside, please refer maintenance to qualified service personnel
deaved_wrath
"Gentlemen, this explosive device is triggered by any slight amount of pressure. It is to be used as an assassination attempt at Fidel Castros birthday party. Is all understood?"
wamsachel
Macintosh decided to take back the "man's best friend" market by introducing a brand new line of iMacs
twiglet
*sniff*...I ...*sniff* I just can't believe hes gone dad, I just want to give him a propper burial now. I've got a better idea, how bout we stuff him, hollow him out and turn him into a PC!
twiglet
Johnny where is your electronics homework. My dog ate it. Alright thats it three weeks deten... No look.
djseifer
"We can rebuild him. We have the technology." "Can you program him to pick up his own poop?" ".....sure, why not?"
Kale09
The last straw in a pool of suspicion that Scruff was not the same dog was when Billy heard him bark in radio waves.
senorcoconut11
A breakthrough for the fetish-porn industry, "Rover" virtually eliminates risks of disease or mid-coitus injury.
wamsachel
We weren't concerned about the leg humping, but when we caught him loving on a furby we decided to get him checked out
kayjo
I miss ol' daisy.... the automated k9 simulation system the taxidermist installed just isn't enough to easy the pain
hvymtalmachine
Billy Mays here. Kids - does your dog run away at the sight of your latest homework you want him to eat? Well, say hello to Fido9000. With a classic furry dog exterior and an industrial-grade, cross-cut shredder on the insides, your dog will be decim
Zoo06
Warning: If Dogbot suffers critical memory error he will slaughter you and your entire family.
the_grobe
when we couldnt just rely on lassie bringing us to the well, we brought in fidoX9 to go into the god damn well to save Timmy, then blew up the well with a RPG he shit out his ass
iantendo
I'm not even going to think about where you insert your memory card on this thing...
Ablutie
Children are now being taught that androids live among us even on their first museum trip
MIkeH.E.S.
By the 3rd franchise reboot, the producers of "The Terminator" had finally tapped the well dry.
Ruffiana
This photo shows some of the intricate internal circuitry used to control an animated canine (lovingly referred to as 'Chip' by the maintenance staff) in one exhibit of the Denver Museum of Nature & Science. (insert penis joke here) Just one ex
toonasty
o11oo1o1oo1oo111ooo1oo1o1 what are you doing man? Programming this bitch to rollover
bafaulkner
Ah, shit. For a second I thought the Unabomber had contributed a hundred craptions.
funwithguns
"...Unfortunately, the dog paddle wasn't an option. We will miss little Tommy sorely."
Deimos
Despite the fact that "The Stepford Wives" blew like a Didgeridoo player on Kleenex brew ,they green lighted this project:Stepford Wives 2:Duck Hunt.
nameismmm
timmy was looking for attention so he programmed lassy to tell his parents he was in a well
karmapoliceman
Biology class gone wrong. Why didn't the mad scientists tell the biology teacher they turned his disection dog into a cyborg? Why?!?!
christophorous
From IMDB: Detroit - in the future - is crime ridden, and run by a massive company. The company sees a way to get back in favour with the public when a [dog] called [Buttons] is killed by a gang [of rabid coyotes]. [Button's] body is reconstructed w
smoochy
Yes officer. That's the dog that told me to kill all those people. Hey! Guess the joke is on ME.
smoochy
You sent me the wrong one. I ordered the Monkey model that's made to pleasure Baboonaphiles.
sniperowl
As a kid I was really curious about what does everyone had inside, so then I open up my dog and realize the horrible truth
Blackmoore
If you noticed the painted background first, you obviously don't spend enough time on the internet.
hadleydb
Molly of Molly and me was stuffed and made into the perfect dog. The old molly was a pain in the ass.
PandaBoy
Apple is releasing this product in a nano version that is %20 smaller and with 30GB extra space.
OvaltinePatrol
Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. We have the technology, we have the capability to make the world's first bionic dog. Noodle will be that dog. Better than she was before; yappier, gassier, with incidents of anal leakage you can set your watch to.
Dannynono
Despite science's best efforts, robo-lassie was never able to truly love a small child.
iceman_419
We can rebuild him, we can make him stronger, we have the parts. Sir are you sure we should spend 6,000,000 repairing your dog? Yes, now shut up and play god.
dkhgames
"I require my motivator, it's probably in the hangar, no not the one with the Vertibird plans, the other one"
riadach
The technology, which in initial form simulated a golden retriever, was eventually used in the development of Vim Diesel.
AdmiralMudkips
After the crash, and the bad plastic surgery, the Gingerbread Man had trouble finding gigs.
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