Other Craptions

Dear Japan STOP IT! regards the rest of the world

Swan Condoms...Billed for her pleasure!

Finally, a strap-on that both princesses AND hobos can enjoy.

She's got a bigger duck than he does.... That's embarrassing...

Are they trying to advertise their product with a balding, hockey player pedophile Hitler? Because that's genius.

Earmuffs and alcoholic father sold seperately.

Duck, Dick, Goose...

I've always called upon the power of the Majestic Swan when I make love. You know me too well, Japan.

Super Mario and Princess Peach are the only choice to advertise our Inflatable wild swan. Get it done, Mr. Miyamoto.

The Swan Princess is actually a porno in Japan

The ugly duckling was actually a beautiful swan... penis... The end.

Before textbooks were invented: "I'll just hide my massive erection with this strategically placed duck..."

Pants with duck-sized hole in crotch sold seperately.

And this is EXACTLY why geese fly south for the winter, Japan!

IT'S A TRAP!

From the makers who brought you the Fleshlight and just a little shame. It's Freshflight for kids. Comes in Bird and so will you.

In their later years, after the magic wore of, Mario and Princess Peach tried many things to rekindle their romance.

japan managed to create a product that combines its two main exports: anime porn and batshit insanery.

An advertisement for abstinence.

So THIS is what's so bad about avian flu...

I like the look of this product, where can I purchase one, Cracked Staff? ...No, I'm dead serious. I am 100% commited to purchasing this, so please contact me via message with any knowledge you have of this products whereabouts or availability.

No guys, it's "chicken!" Choking the CHICKEN

Ducky style

Sex has never been more confusing.

I can't even fathom what that limited set of instructions is trying to tell me.

You know, for kids....

Cup the duck's wings for MAXIMUM THRUSTING POWER.

The story of the swan and the ugly duckling, as told by genitals,

blah blah blah, choking a chicken, blah blah blah. TA-DA!

Maybe if we nuke ourselves we would become awesome too?

Um, you know guys, sometimes a duck is just a duck. Not this time, but sometimes.

Guess who's about to go SOUTH for the winter? See what I did there?

I bet this is from Japan...and was recently on LOST, or something....

Exploding Goose Dildo Candy!!! Now at a supermarket near you.

There were happier days, back before the princess of Arian Germany had to suck Hitler's duck, beginning her gradual decline into the world of the quack-whore.

The History Channel finally discovered Gallagher Hitler's fetish for ballerina transvestites.

I'll give YOU a goose.

Interesting fact: In Australia, they have black swans. They're bigger.

Translation: Mother Goose Penis Warmer, now available for women.

Stuffed duck is an entirely different delicacy in Japan.

This version of Duck Hunt is more fun anyway.

They call this the iProd in Japan.

He can see her ButtQUACK.

You rike swan cock? You buy swan cock. Swan cock for him and her. Smash fist, swan cock make hard!

IN SOVIET RUSSIA! aww... fuck it....

I'm trying to decide if swan rape is worse than tentacle rape.

In psychology we call this a "Freudian slip." Everywhere else, we call this a "strap on."

This is what you get when you combine Swan Lake and The Nutcracker.

Pretty much Japan summed up on one box