Other Craptions

I scream, you scream, we all.... OH MY GOD!!!

In Candyland, it's a little easier to spot the pedophiles.

And Baskin Robbins introduced a horrifying 32nd flavor.

Cone-ibalism

Fortunately, the monster was easily defeated when the sun came out.

I didn't realize Child Molestor was a flavor.

Eventually, Michelangelo had to do a few more "commercial" sculptures in order to pay the bills.

With a name like "Mr Softee" it's no wonder he's single.

"I tried to think of the most harmless thing. Something I loved from my childhood. Something that could never ever possibly destroy us."

T.C.B.WHY"?

Late Night with Cone O' Brien

How does Cracked always know my sexual fantasies?

In this economy, I'm just happy to have a job.

Michael Jackson finally gets the plastic surgery he always wanted

Honey, come meet our new babysitter.

The Friday the 13th reboot looks fucking retarded.

Rosie O'Donnell didn't come out of the closet, she came out of the refrigerator.

Previously on According to Jim.

So... Hell is actually COLD, then?

"Larry, you realize this isn't a costume party, right?"

is that a banana in his pocket?

Wait a minute, you're not BustyChick69!

LICK ME! ALL OF YOU!

why does the black one always have to be the biggest, and on top?

I scream, you scream, we all curl up in the fetal position.

Dairy Queen finally comes up with a corporate mascot creepier than the plastic-faced Burger King.

Introducing Carvel's new "Special" flavors: Monglo-Berry, God Hates U Vanilla and Rechocotard.

Yummy! I wish I could put him inside me. (Pause No Homo)

3 fingers?

It's really the children of mixed couples that suffer the most.

That's not whipped cream on his head, if you know what I mean. (It's jizz)

The coldest, baddest motherfucking ice cream on the planet has no qualms with cannibalizing his own kind in order to enhance his deliciousness

Oprah's worst nightmare.

Happy Valent... wh.. where are you going? ...Honey?

Rule #34 goes way, way too far.

That's what happens when both parents are Dreyers.

To this day Gary still can't understand why his ice cream store went bust

Somehow this was omitted from Cracked's list of "The 5 Most Half-Assed Monsters in Movie History"

Terrifying? Sure, but at least it's racially balanced.

Those aren't pillows!

AAAH, Cannibals!!!!

I scream!!

Ice Cream in Amsterdam is... diffrent.

Is he housebroken, or does he just go around dropping little ice cubes all over the place?

"It was that morning I realized I had to quit drinking..."

Lick me! LICK ME! LICK ME!!! You know you want to!

But it comes with a free Frugurt! ooh, that's good! ...the Frugurt is also cursed.

Congratulations ma'am, you've had quadruplets. Tasty........quadruplets.

Somebody's been smoking Micheal Phelp's bong!