Other Craptions

"Bout dat time i realized that wasn't no Santa Claus at all.. Told the got damn loch ness monsta he wudn't gettin' no damn tree fitty!..."

That's right, even on Christmas Eve, I have nothing better to do than try to write a craption.

He sees you when you're sleeping...

Note to self: never Google "Santa" and "thong" again.

Just take the cookies and leave! Please!

MERRY CHRISTMAS MUTHA FUCKER!

don we now our gay apparel

"I am sick and tired.. of these mutha fuckin' poor decorations.. on my mutha fuckin' HOLIDAY!"

Even Santa did some things in the past he wasnt particularly proud of...

Choclate "Mandingo" Santa Clause...$599.00. Leaving it in the living room of your white supremacist neighbors...PRICELESS!!!

SO THIS IS CHRISTMAS UNDER OBAMA huh!?!

What?? You expect me to cirumnavigate the entire GLOBE in ONE day, and be an overweight white guy??!

Is that wall robbing Santa?

Arnold Santanegger

Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus... And he is FABULOUS!!

Jingle all the way: 2

I know I should be upset by the gayness of this picture, but seriously, why is Santa black!?

So THATS what kwanza is...

I am not so sure that I want a present any more, Santa.

Well, now I know the package Santa is bringing me this Christmas will be HUGE!

Don't make Santa angry. You wouldn't like Santa when he's angry.

Some believe that Saint Nicholas was a charitable Turkish priest who spread joy amongst the hearts of the less fortunate. Others however, view him as a homosexual black muscleman, bent on destruction and doom.

Im Dreaming Of A BROWN Christmas mommy

Silent Night Fever.

Whatcha gonna do brother, when Kringle-mania runs wild on you?

"Have you been a good boy this year, Billy?" "depends...which answer doesn't result in me being ass-raped?"

" TO THE CORN EXCHANGE"!!!!!!!

Seems as though EVERYBODY made a porno when they were younger.

Its the Dark-skinned or Asian Santa Claus!

Take my wallet...and the sleigh, just leave me and the elves unharmed.

Madness?! THIS! IS! CHRISTMAAAAAAS!!!

Oops. Guess we're under the mistletoe... ...of rape.

'Twas the night before Christmas, and Santa was pissed. So he took some steroids, and made a death list. He killed a thousand people, after drinking some beer And he ran off into the night, screaming, "Kill ya next year!"

Running late one Christmas, Santa decides to call on the Power of Grey Skull in order to make his rounds on time.

Ho Ho, Where the Hoes!!?

The Turdminator was scary. Scarier still was knowing he'd be back.

Years later, more evidence emerged of the horrible Clauschwitz experiments.

The flashing green arrow was one of several non-subtle ways Darren got guys to stare at his muscles

Bro-ho-ho..

What happens in N. Pole, stays in N. Pole.

"Don't bury him in the Pet Sematary" Judd says. "Sometimes, death is better." He says. Why didn't I listen!?

that's it, I'm converting to Judaism...

Note to Americans: We can't blame this on Japan. Looks like we're gonna have to bite the bullet on this one. It's Canadian.

"so the guy just runs in, in a santa outfit and shouts.... "NIGGERS"!

Well thats my Christmas ruined

"Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. Then from the chimney arose a clickity-clack. That was the year I found out that Santa was black."

im dreaming... of a white girl for christmas....

Actually the song is wrong, it was daddy who was kissing Santa, not mommy.

FUCK THAT, I Want to be on his naughty list.