That's an awful lot of work just to provide a little hamster with a swing-set.
Wow, this will definitely do whatever it does better than the other thing that did it before.
This is one of those claw games, but there's no prize. It just picks up and shakes around anyone stupid enough to put in a quarter.
the slavers had set up a "human trap" which for many unfortunate victims would be noticed to late
Not sure what the hell this is, but its classified as art, and somewhere, someone is masturbating to it.
Xenor hung his head in shame. No girl would ever talk to him while he was a chain smoker.
Dentists, not wanting people to be afraid of them anymore, take their craft public.
Replacing the playpark's swingset with killbots wasn't the Mayor's most popular decision.
The rat ran a corrupt political machine down there in Illinois. Governor Blagojevich would sell Obama's Senate seat to anyone.
"The Guantanamo Bay Experience" proved to be an unpopular attraction at Dubya Land.
Attempts to use modern technology to improve the umbrella have been largely unsucessful.
"Now if you'll just sign here...No lady! I don't know what it is! It comes with your monthly subsription to Discover Magazine!"
Outside of the George W. Bush Library is the REAL secret to his success....For 25 cents, this handy machine will shove YOUR head up your ass, too....
People now a days are too busy walking around staring at their blackberries that they don't even realize War of the Worlds has begun.
We don't know what it is either, but we're all screwed if Achmadinejad gets his hands on one.
Optimus Prime's retarded little brother......has nothing to do with this picture...cool lookin machine tho
Is this one of those machines that has sex with you and you don't even know it, and then like 3 weeks later you shit a tiny green baby who steals your rent money? Cuz I hate those things.
And you ask what can one do with a community college arts degree??? Well sir gaze upon my answer in amazement!
WARNING! Wondering whatever this thing is or does will cause your head to fucking explode.
To operate it you need a man and a dog. The man to feed the dog, and the dog to keep the man the hell away from it.
Somewhere in the world, a dictator is wondering why there's a statue of the thinking man in his torture chamber.
Unobserved fact: It's not an umberella. It's a small building behind her's tiled roof.
Racest bitches on da forum done baned me an shit! For speakin da damn TRUTH! Yall be herein from my loyers! I gots RIGHTS yall! Jus like regular white folks an shit! Called da Second Commandment in da damn Bills a Rights bitches!
We should've never let Dudley Heinsbergen build our sun dial... (if you get the reference you win a nickel!)
The Medical School could not even fathom the horror that would come from allowing Doctor Jones' "experimental methods" out on the quad.
Upon looking at the sculpture the girl was thankful that she had decided to wear panties today.
Homeland Security is still having trouble with disguising its surveillance devices.
While all of you losers were worrying about Global Warming, Financial Crisis, and the election, the government was building... this!
Some of the sentient roboys are not bent on destroying mankind, some just want to hang out in the quad and read poetry...
The robot's attempt to take over the building was as dissappointing as their subtlety.
Though Jim's killbot had a very limited range, it was nonetheless very effective.
This is one of those $1,000 government toilets. Big problem: the thing doesn't flush.
Carol, since you're going out anyway, would you mind switching out the bait in the CYLON trap?
Jenny's High School decided there was no better time to build their alien-defense system.
Iraq have stepped up from their plan to eliminate George Bush with shoes...
When I was a kid, all the other kids had Big Wheels. My Dad got me this. It was cool and everything, but couldn't I have had a Big Wheel too?
The first ever public demonstration of the Gerbil Launcher, brought to you by Pepsi
In order to save the planet, Lucky, the world's strongest mouse, took on the giant mechanical bear and came out on top.
The spared each other a glance as the passed, remembering the activities of the other night and knowing that they could never truelly be together.
Mousetrap: Deluxe now for sales!! Now YOU can feel what lab rats feel when shocked repeatedly!!
After the empire was destroyed, some people made a lot of money in backyard sales.
Hollywood decided to replace Keanu Reeves with something of a similar emotional range to cut costs.
I heard the new rainmaker causes balls of fire to fall upon earth... so I brought my umbrella.
Giant ray-gun: Check Some girl: Check Time machine: Check Gerbil: Check Dignity: Oops....
Little-Known Fact: Before becoming a popular surrealist artist, HR Giger worked designed toddler swings for Fisher-Price.
Dat be looky like anotha damn invention da white crackas done stole from da black man! Like da cotton gym an da computers! Yall be fucken THEIFS!!
Little-Known Fact: Before becoming a popular surrealist artist, HR Giger designed toddler swings for Fisher-Price.
The most elaborate mouse trap in the world. But if the mouse manages to get past the laser turret on top and the giant steel claw, there's always still the actual mouse trap hanging from the chain.
Just goes to show. You can take the microscope out of the lab, but the scientist is still scared of the sun.
the Large Hamster Collider was put on display the other day in the National Museum of Bullshit
Eventually, a dildo just doesn't do it anymore, but how the fuck does this thing ravish the vag?
Todd the hamster was elaborate with his suicides only less people to share it with
No one suspected that Jimmy's innocent hamster was building one of the most deadly devicese known to man that wasn't the hadron Collider...
Hidden camera tricks 101: That machine is small, that is a full size human inside it. The woman with the umbrella makes it bigger, and the camera adds 500 pounds to the machine.
This modern contraption is used to retrieve hampsters from the anus of homosexuals. "Trust me it's a painful as it looks."
When Chuck Norris orders a Wristwatch It's gotta be one mean looking Wristwatch!
Nobody knows where it came from. But as long as it keeps voting Democrat, nobody cares.
Turning down dates has gotten harder since the university started offering that degree in the Mad Sciences...
Hey you! Farmer's Wife! Yeah, down HERE! Where's your 'Carving Knife' NOW? BITCH!!
We asked Joe to design this year's Downtown Christmas Tree. Three beers, five shots of vodka, and two joints later, we got this...
The shade-less Umbrella! Oh wait that's a flyer kiosk. Back to the huge metal nonsense I suppose.
this isnt supposed to be funny... but guys shes not holding an umbrella. thats the roof on the building behind her.
Unvailing the debt remover. Just step under here and pull the string. You'll just feel a pinch.
So THATS where my tax dollars were going!!! No wonder someone threw a shoe at you!!
Whatever this is, it probably connects to the contraption in yesterday's pic.
Saw 6: we ran out of creepy places so we're just going to go ahead and torture your hamster in broad daylight.
Man, the extreme measures they go through to cast a snowflake shadow on the ground.
Introducing the ZephyrEpoch - the world's first combination Wind Chime and Time Machine
"What's it do?" "We've theorized that it's part of an early attempt at time travel from 500 B.C. developed by a super race of TELEPATHIC BEINGS." "Really?" "No. Henderson made it to fold his laundry. It doesn't really work."
The average child's conception of what a dentist's office looks like. But you know, aside from the Death Ray Death Machine of Deadly Death and the girl with a fucking parasol, it's alright.
"Hahaha!! I shall now zappify this small creature and...is that girl holding an umbrella?"
After losing more than 17 dollars in quarters, Jenny had finally caught the still-breathing gerbil from the claw machine
Newest trap in the saw series: You can let your hamster be killed by being crushed, or crush yourself a little to save it... Make your choice.
Airport security caught terrorist gerbil on no-fly list and removed it from its luggage. Claims he wasn't allowed flight because "he is black", plans to sue.
Tragically, the entire Earth was instantly vaporized with the MARTIAN DEATH RAY because Brooke wouldn't trade her precious Rainbow Bright Umbrella for a petrified hamster.
Slowly news began to spread that Angelina Jolie had donated her IUD to the museum of gynocological wonders.
Introducing the ultimate in sensual anal pleasure... It's the Richard Gere Gerbilator 3000!* *gerbil not included
Among many new changes, the robotic overlords demanded humans always carry umbrellas. No one has yet to ask why.
Unfortunatly, not even an umbrella can save you from the downpour of utter pretentiousness that is bad art.
Moments later, the mouse is flung directly into the sun. Forever proving, it is in fact possible to build a better mouse trap.
Just then, their eyes met. And after that moment, Lucy and Robo-Hamster would never be the same again.
How 'bout a hand, hun?... Seriously? Nothing? No arms here, lady... This rodent isn't going to eat itself. ... Bitch.
Wiley Coyote was tired of using Acme products to catch the Road Runner, so he bought this matter transporter from a local mad scientist.
ED209 was reduced to campus security until finally he started selling his parts on the street.
The alien invasion wasn't as fear inducing as they had hoped, mainly due to Phil's dangling genitalia.
The proposals for what the Big Three should spend the bailout money on come in.
It's just a big fucking thing...no more, no less. Stop looking into the meaning of the bends and shit. It's just a hunk of fucking metal.
I used to be sane but when I used the Mindblower, I completely went mad and I've never felt monkey vacuum toilet plunger.
The American auto industry just unveiled their secret weapon, it installs windshield wipers ten percent faster.
Even with umbrella technology at it's height, Jane still preferred her a ntique parasol.
Now that the Saw franchise has gone stale, they decided to open it up for street performance.
This is what millions of dollars of donations from scientologists produced, and all it does is make coffee.
New on campus torture chambers for assholes and girls who wear makeup to class.
Transformers reject posing as art, waiting for his day to take over the world.
Mercilessly bullied by his robot peers, Umrellabot finally found somebody to pick on.
Plankton, after years of failing to nab the Crabby Paddy recipe, decides he can no longer go on living. He will be missed.
This new anti-matter ray will one day eliminate all the retarded people, like this woman for instance.
When passing near the death ray of death it is recommended that you use protective covering to guard against falling body parts
whats worse? the fact that there is way to macinery for what appears to be a rat on a beach, or the fact that the girl in the back is more concerned about her text message?
Say Hadron Collider again! Say Hadron Collider one more motherfuckin' time! I double-dog dare you!
The kids at Waterloo knew things were going to change once Stephen Hawkings got there...but DAMN!
I never thought I would see Alexander Calder interpret "Alien" - and I wish I never had
The girl contemplated the large red button and what would happen if she pushed it.
Every night, Einstein would hook himself into this. He was kinda like Michael Jackson, except not a pedophile.
As hard as Orgasmatron tried, he still couldn't help but feel his disguise wasn't fooling anyone.
so, the ball is on the end of the chain and it goes in... well...just come over here and let me show you.
"Uh-huh, OK, so it's 2:00, and I'm at the thingy in the Quad...when DOES my e-harmony date show up?"
Destroyer Droids guarding the University of Corescuant have fallen into major disrepair.
Some Transformers have incredible powers, but all Vexortron can do is barf up a chain.
After months of negotiation, the Kinsey Institute finally obtained Rosie O'Donnell's industrial strength vibrator and put it on public display.
After failing out of the RoboCop program, ED-209 spent his days wandering the streets teabgging bums and flashing old women.
"Damn't I said an information board, not a time-machine, hamster swing, and claw-grab game combined into one shitty piece of art!"
The nefarious Jabbergizmo, felt rather naked without its PVC in place, and hid quickly after the lady in the blue shorts laughed at him.
Even after 4 years of college Emily still can't figure out how to burn ants on a sunny day
With the economy's current credit crunch, ATM's combine with American Gladiator and create the newest reality pay-per-view show: "SEVERE Penalty for Early Withdrawal"
Tired of all the mass destruction, the killmachine decided to take a day off in the park.
Some Transformers have incredible powers, but all Vomitron can do is barf up a chain.
Thus we prove that anything is, Damnit Johnson, I said NO playing with the explodo-max 5000
People will be too busy looking at the retarded non-functional basket form to notice I'm licking a doobie.
Ha, those pitiful humans, little do they know the power of my supergalactic mega-death ray. Now if only I hadn't press the bright 'eject' button...
The device was nearly complete. Harry the Hamster just needed an lludium Pu-36 Explosive Space Modulator and the world would be his.
Genetically engineered "smart" mice concoct their ultimate revenge weapon. Now if that stupid lady would just go for the bait!
Dr. No donated this device to ITT Tech before the IRS seized his assets following the failed robbery attempt on Fort Knox.
Likes: teddy bears. Dislikes: runny noses and not having a sleeve to wipe it on
Jimmy thought that going to the dentist outside would be better. Jimmy was wrong.
The Plaque reads: No Mr. Bond I expect you to die. On loan from the estate of No.
Mary wanted to press the ON button, but she really had no idea what the hell that thing did.
Famous Las Words: Are YOU swuch a quute widdle mouse!? Will you let me twuch you?
Paris Hilton knows EXACTLY what this device is for, there is even a video of her with it on the internet. Check it out.
This super powered ray gun has the capability to destroy any minuscule object placed on the swing... Now back to cancer and global warming research
The GoBots, not trying to be left behind, tried to make the transition to the big screen with very little success.
the classic children's game Mouse Trap gets updated for the new millenium
When you absolutely, positively have got to kill every last motherfucker in the room, accept no substitutes.
I step outside and this is what I see... A women with an umbrella. Oh, and a giant fucking torture device
Megatron's younger cousin, Umbrellatron, was feeling really bad about what they said about his penis the other day
Parts of a crane. Check. Broken Electro-magnet. Check. Out of Place Gun Turret. Check. Birdfeeder. Check?
Day 1 of the mutant mole conspiracy, they would come to the surface making holes with giant ray guns....
It's a time machine so I can go back to 1999 and borrow money from myself.
Side effects may include cancer, bloody diarrhea, multiple personalities, voilent tremors, and rotting teeth. Feel like yourSELF again!!!
That thing is horrible...I'm not saying its useless or it doesn't work or anything you know but seriously...jesus.....
Dat be looky like da damn beagle pup I put inna da kennel wid my damn pits when I be trainin them to fight in shit! LMFBAO! Yall shoulda seen what dey done! Chew him damn ears off an shit!
Why you crackas be deletrin all my comments bitch?!? I gots rights jus like yall! Second commandment bitch!
It's actually just Star Fox... tilted sideways. See there's Andross spitting stuff at Fox in his Arwing.
I guess its pretty common to kill a gerbil with a mouse trap or something but seriously, what the fuck???!!
MUAHAHAHA!! I have turned you into a hamster Mr. Bond!!! How will you foil my ridiculously complicated and unnecessary plan to ruin something NOW?!MUAHAHAHA!!!
1) place mouse in trap 2) set falling steel cage 3) let the babes roll in...to your basement.
Lady Parasol couldn't help but think of Mrs. Jumbo locked in animal prison as she wept silently looking at Wall-E's mom trapped in a modern sculpture garden.
the 7th insane Discovery that no one knows what the fuck it does but it seems to make people open umbrellas for no reason
Fool me once, RAT, shame on you ... Fool me TWICE, shame on me ... Fool me three times and I'm a Fucking Moron!
Amusingly, the Roof-That-Looks-Like-An-Inappropriate-Umbrella-From-a-Distance was garnering more attention than the council's latest tax-heavy outdoor art exhibits.
Designed to kill whoever is dumb enough to take the hamster, Carla patiently waited for an innocent bystander to come close
It's a bitch to carry around, but this was the smallest sized micro-scope Timmy could get a hold of to help him find his dick.
So THAT's where the Matrix guys got the design for the Sentinels. I knew they didn't do any original work.
Of course it's not raining but once that thing shoots the bird there is going to be blood everywhere.
Luckily for Dr. Doom, his deathray was mistaken by all the park goers as some fruity object d'art.
Fortunately, the Hatred Beam could not penetrate Sally's Parasol of Good Will. Dr. Malignant's plot had failed.
After given the choice to provide text books to the local school or to donate to the arts, Mary knew she had made the right choice.
Redundant umbrella girl is about to take the bait...closer!...Closer!...AWWW Crap! she found the hidden penis guys, mission aborted. Now whose idea was it to make a metal penis the shape of a light microscope?
When Michael Bay and Disney collide...the world will have a chance to see...MICE: the musical!!-This summer..
Brilliant, bait the trap with Prada shoes then wait. No woman in her right mind will be able to resist. That's how Obama won, brilliant just brilliant.
Hey Lady! Over here! Have you seen a little girl named "Alice"? She's due back in Lewis Carroll's ACID TRIP any time now...
to NASA scientists, it was transponder 868-B of a fallen satellite. to Karissa, it was Fluffy.
"Okay Neil, tell that girl to take one step back and I'll show you how this thing works."
Landing as it did at UC Berkley the Alien Earth Probe was mistaken for a piece of modern art. Thus its concept of earthlings was distorted by its initial contact with a Chihuahua.
I dunno what this is, but Discovery Channel turned it down for "HowStuffWorks"....
In a bold move, the physics department moved their experiments to where women could see them. Not pictured: success.
-Are you sure it wont hurt? -Don't worry, with the latest breakthroughs in colonoscopy, the process is a breeze!
The bait was set. Soon, the inventory of Biff's Parasol Shack would be increasing by one.
Alvin, the device you are hooked up to is rigged to dice you up in five minutes. There is only one key to the device, and it is in the back of your eye socket. Live or die, the choice is yours. -Jigsaw, Saw VI
OMG!! I can't believe that they made Perceptor a microscope again in Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen!
Mr. Crane and Ms. Microscope knew their love was forbidden, but they didn't know exactly why untill they saw their kid.
Dreamworks just revealed what Perceptor would look like in Transformers:Revenge of the Fallen.
Scientist: "Ladies and Gentlemen. I give the MateraHampstalizer." Rodent: "Shit."
"Sorry to - ahem - RAIN on your parade, Mr. Johnson, but we're going to have to foreclose your house due to missing mortgage payments. Have fun with you mechanical fucking umbrella."
"I was really sad when I found out Polly hung herself, but these guys bought her and her cage for $3,000!! I don't know why, but whatever. I need a pick-me-up. Let's go to the art museum!!"
And with this, my Evil Hamster Laser, I will control the moon and tides, and thus...THE WORLD!!! *psychotic laughter*
Archeologists uncover the Baigong spacecraft launching device. Note: Andy Guerriero is seeking opportunities with another website, and we wish him the best in his future endeavors.
I guess this is what happens when the Pixar lamp hangs out with Barry Bonds and Mark McGwire.
With the bait set, a harmless gerbil lies in wait for the sexual feriocity of Richard Gere...
Yes Mr. Gere, the gerbil implant device was a success... but we must warn you... there may be dire consequences to overuse.
I'm not sure what this contraption does, but I would like to use it on "Your move..." craptioners.
No one really understood the Joker's newest invention, which is exactly how he wanted it.
MOUSE: Lady, I can still SATISFY you ... If you don't mind a little "mechanical" assistance ...
Finally giving in to despair, the Statue of Gayness attempts to commit suicide by fellating a muffler. Sadly it was not attached to a car.
When challenged to a shadow puppet contest, Giant Metal Structure Man knew that she could not match his "Flying Squirrel".
Since I'm off work today I'm going to the bar this morning to kill time and build up some wit for the new Craption tomorrow.
The Joker didn't quite have enough material for his "super death ray" so he just made a mini one instead.
Okay; ball gag, check. blindfold, check harness, check Alright honey, you and I are ready for some dirty dirty mouse lovin! Honey?
In an attempt to recreate Wall-E, an entire campus of students was slaughtered horribly.
Het don't you think that the Terminator's wife is a fat bitch. Watch out Sarah Connor.
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