Other Craptions

Well, that's what happens when you don't make reservations!

"I have the winning hand," he thought, "but how do I lay my cards out on the table?" It was a chin-scratcher.

Hey, the Union says we get a lunch break...we get a fucking lunch break!

Salvador Dali and MC Escher discuss their works over lunch.

PETA should just stick with naked chicks. Their newest protest is just way too freaking confusing.

Distracted by his full house, Chuck didn't notice Bob falling to his death.

Hmmm.. I'll have the GET ME THE FUCK DOWN FROM HERE!

haha! a pair of kings! you were a worthy opponent but its time for your wire to be cut!

And when God cameth back from his day of rest, He knew not what the fucketh was going on.

"OK, do you want the non-smoking table or the gravity-defying section?"

You can do some crazy shit in GTA 5.

Art is subjective... no wait, retarded.

Cross "people playing poker sideways on a building" from my list of things to see before I die.

Hopefully, they didnt order the soup.

And this is why Tim Burton rarely gets second dates.

Ted always scratched his chin when he was bluffing.

"and then he put his balls right HERE on my chin"

"I've got a pair of Kings, what do you have?" "Uh. . . Soiled Pants, and no Flush."

Gordon Ramsay's input for new restaurants is getting weirder.

This is the last time we dine al FRESCO!

Extreme Mural Painting: Inner City Edition

Salvador Dali presents Casino Royale

It required the entire CSI team to dust for fingerprints when Sir Edmund Hillary's family was murdered.

You should see what the table next to the bathroom looks like.

"You know, I bet if someone took a picture of us in this force 10 gale from the side it would look like we were all dangling off a wall." "Stop stalling and play your f***ing hand"

I got it! Paint! Paint will make us even more hip and trendy somehow

White folks take all the fun out of graffiti.

Superpowers or no superpowers, nerds will always be nerds...

Greg and Pete's gambling addiction was starting to interfere with their work.

"Have you seen that movie sideways? I was thinking about it for some reason."

Criss Angel ponders if he can somehow be a bigger douche.

Art Shmart. THIS shit right here is why Splinter named the turtles after the most awesome Renaissance painters.

The only martini bar that still serves Harvey Wallbangers.

Have I mentioned that you always have the BEST acid? Cause it's true.

"I'm applying for the painting job... I was just wondering when we take lunch break?" "Oh, uh... 12:30... It takes some getting used to."

Now that the laws of gravity no longer applied to them, the executives were free to vandalise competing restaurant chains.

Is this a tipping situation?

Frank, I thought you said we wouldn't stick out.

Sven pondered the meaning of existence while, Hans wondered what the fuck they were doing playing cards sideways.

"You ever feel like something just ain't right?"

Damn it Ted! You slipped on the wall didn't you! Great, there goes our deposit on these suits.

Bob and Sue were driven up the wall about the prices in the latest restaraunt.

Graffiti artists in California are so much more sophisticated than their East-coast counterparts.

Mark and Sandy decided that their relationship was going to be no strings attached

Unfortunately, the entire painting force forgot their overalls.

Somehow Texas Hold 'Em just doesn't work when the River is 10 stories below the game.

High Stakes poker: winner get the last rope

I went to a friend's house, and he said I'd have to sleep on the floor. Damn Gravity! Got me again. You don't know how much I wanted to sleep on the wall. -Mitch Hedberg

We're individuals. We don't conform to everyone else