landmine76
"I'll balance the barber pole, Steve will look at my balls, Chuck will spot me, and Gary... I don't know, your fat ass can just stand there and flash gang signs for all I care."
HardcoreMax
Gee, Chloe, I could TELL you how i lost my virginity, but I'd rather SHOW you...THROUGH INTERPRETIVE DANCE!
jsrduck
His parents wanted him to become a lawyer, but Benjy knew he had to follow his dream.
schadenfreude9
In other religions it's harder to talk to God, but you get quicker results.
DrTom
Without television, North Koreans must meet secretly to re-enact episodes of Seinfeld.
Fkelleghan
Son, when you participate in sporting events, it’s not whether you win or lose: it’s how drunk you get.
microhendy
And the American tourists who obliged to tell Asians of the rules of Basketball are laughing their asses off.
Gambler
Hiro found it really funny to use his time-stopping abilities to stick his annoying uncle on Ando's shoulders.
Blackthorne
The giant straw had killed dozens, but they weren't letting Carlos go without a fight.
jsrduck
The Timberwolves pause during one of their practices to get the ball unstuck from the hoop.
Gambler
Whilst it may resemble fire at first, the mark on their shirts is actually a montage from The Simpsons.
stapleears
This is the one little fight the Fresh Prince got in that scared his mom. If you look in the background you can see people chillin' out, maxin', and relaxin'.
MindPez
I don't know what the other 3 guys are doing, but the guy on the right, is definitely rocking out to an AC/DC song of some sort..
landmine76
We call this piece: "God Drinks Larry's Brain Through a Straw While We Dance." Thank you for supporting the arts.
Gambler
Hurrah! Three cheers for the return of Takeshi's Castle in it's new form: Takeshi's circus!
microhendy
"Dude, that's trippin'!" "Well, that's throwing a pipe at my head so I think we're even."
Genkai
Faced with economic hardships, the Japanese space program is experimenting with a few new ideas. The Human Space-Ladder to OuterSpace is coming along nicely.
gtrplyr515
That is when people found out the makers of World of Warcraft were not as cool as everyone originally thought.
Ironlightsaber
I don't think they understand how you are suppose to break open a pinata.
Dr.Avery
Winning Craption Recipe: One part thinly veiled racism, add gay. Exclamation marks to taste!!!
Leaf
The local fire department installed a great fire pole in the station. They just didn't think of installing some stairs to get back up again.
Weirdly
you can dance if you want to, you can leave your friends behind, cause your friends don't dance and if they don't dance, they aint no friends of mine.
Leaf
Determined to prove to the court that he is not, in fact, 'unbalanced', Carlos inadvertently gets another 4 years in the psychiatric institute.
BowToTheBard
The U.N. was initially skeptical of the Phillipines' plan to plug the ozone hole.
Enabsflow
Lvl. 4 Jellyfish Kite appears! "JELLYFISH, ATTACK!" Dance Troop takes 7 damage and itchy stng bumps.
Riggz309
I'm not sure this is what Led Zepplin had in mind when they wrote "Stairway to Heaven".
MasterBates
Cirque de Soliel feels the economic crunch, as they begin outsourcing to migrant labor
mabogo
The pygmy perverts figured out how, with just a little effort they could look up normal sized women's skirts....
sgt.mcnasty
Though popular in in the Asian underground, Team Freestyle Pole Vaulting never quite took off.
BeardedClam
Tony. I told you this kite shit won't work. We gotta get one more guy up here to get that lightbulb!
satur92002
After throwing up John, the infamous Japanese tossing team waited twenty minutes for him to come back down. THAT'S just how good they were.
schadenfreude9
China's Got Talent managed to be more disturbing that its American counterpart
xgrendelx
I don't think that's an appropriate time to flash gang signs. Mothra might get mad.
smallshrimp
Pablo and guerrero may have been conjoined in an odd way, but dam it all they knew how to party
DirkBelig
Until the Wii shortage abates, we're going to be seeing more of this desperation.
Bionic_Crouton
When you asked if I wanted to get high, I thought you meant something else...
Sairin
"The Pole is too short" "You should have got more material" "But they're never going to see us way back here" "NO WAIT, I HAVE A PLAN"
MenDAKE
It was Lopez, not Carlos who had really won Special Olympics gold, but no one but Lopez really gave a shit.
bobleponge
It had been 10 years to the day that the street performers had killed the giant flying blue goldfish's parents... Now it was out for revenge.
Gregoclock
the old trick of making yourself 'look as big as you can' failed to deter the flying jellyfish
HardcoreMax
The guy on the right was pretty pissed when they interrupted his ghetto rap.
bydonn
Two words: Odor Eaters. Seriously. And, washing the nads more often ain't a bad idea, either...
DanFraley
Surprisingly, Chinese officials rejected the original opening ceremony for the Beijing Olympics
HardcoreMax
They continued with their act, unaware that a giant inter dimensional rift had opened up behind them...
chromigula
Replacing the fuel rods provides entertainment for entire villages in the Venezuelan Nuclear Power Program.
hibby989
When one sees a strange object falling from the sky, it is best NOT to stand on one's friend's shoulders to get a closer look
hibby989
All the neighborhood children laughed at Chuck for the hole in his head, making up various stories to explain how it happened. If only they'd seen the ugly, horrifying truth...
AsYouWish
Off -off -off -way the fuck- off broadway production of "Save baby Jessica from the pipe"
bydonn
Soon Yee chose to stand on Kim's shoulders, since he had 4 arms, and a 3rd leg. And, Lin, the Retarded One, could do nothing but dance that Gansta Dance....
ajp1015
How many...uhhhh...of those guys does it take to...uhhhh....do that????..Fuck, that joke could have been hilarious!
Iapyx
Yao Ming takes off his disguise, showing that he is, in fact, two Asian people on top of each other.
ironslick
Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down ummm... can i let you down now?
Rex-Jester
Testers at Whamos' secret testing facility play with a new prototype called "poke the sky."
Truthiness
The border patrol was catching onto the three when the last guy to jump the fence missed.
DamnitDog
The audience waits patiently for the answer to the question, does he see his keys?
SpunkyHePanda
Oh God, what do I make fun of first? The shoes? Yeah, let's go with the shoes. Hey, nice shoes, dipshits!
bydonn
Reduced to street performers, they longed for the days when they were once an Empire and they ruled the world. Now, they simply settled for coins tossed at their feet...
iceman_419
The most effort I've ever seen put into trying to look up a tall woman's dress.
Wazula
CRAPTION QUIZ: Are these fellows... A. Japanese B. Mexican C. Korean Click the red button for the answer!------------->
UncleBear
"You wanna bet someone will take a picture of this that will show up on Craptions?"
bydonn
Unable to find work after M*A*S*H, life has gotten difficult for the down-on-their-luck extras.... "Spare some coin, Joe?"
bydonn
"No, no, no, it's TETHER ball, not FEATHER ball, you idiots! Now, get down and dance with me!"
DScolpini
When "You Got Served" was remade by the Asians, America was completely put to shame.
Chivalrous
As Superman flew away with the Invisible Woman, Marco lept on Juan's shoulders to get a look up her dress. What Marco didn't know was that Juan was getting an eyeful of his own.
carramrod
DUDE HURRY UP WE HAVENT GOT MUCH MORE TIME TO FLY THE KITE GET IT DOWN GET IT DOWN!
carramrod
I'm almost certain this has to do with celebration. I'm still trying to figure it out though.
technotard
MySpace sensations The Cantonese Muthafuckas show western audiences why their low-fi concert effects totally kick ass.
getittwistd
White suburban teenagers everywhere were seen at golf shops and bowling stores buying as many tacky polo's as they could carry.
SUPERNAUT44
too bad they dont know that the 50 foot woman has herpes that can be transmitted through respiration.
g-unit
And as the onlookers feared for their lives, our hero realized that the only way to defeat the giant purple dragon was to to jump up on his brother's shoulders and punch it in its enormous wang.
Tunikidya
Okay kids, today we are going to learn how to look up a circus performer's dress.
arethusa
Jose and Jorge only wanted one thing...to see up the skirt of the giant lady on the pogo stick
microhendy
"Well, this is a story all about how my life got flipped right upside down..."
bluedayorange
So excited that they all got the new Jordan's and were now an official Dance group. They decided to shit on each others heads in celebration.
gtrplyr515
"I don't know guys... I mean they said vagina is hard to find but this is ridiculous"
getittwistd
Wow, I love it when I post like 6 craptions and only 1 of them actually shows up, but don't vote for this craption, because it would go against everything I believe, in which is nothing, because I'm an atheist. HI MOM!
_Phoenix_
It wears matching clothes and confuses cracked.com readers, it does this whenever it's told.
Swaimfan
When confronted by two Japanese fighters, black people often "double up" to appear taller and more intimidating. Occasionally, the illusion is enhanced with large props.
getittwistd
A little to the left, a little more....(meanwhile, in Frank's head "maybe one day i'll see a girl naked..."). Alas, it was not meant to be.
adogg4629
Edwardo and his team get very little appreciation and noteriety for working so hard to keep the sky from falling.
unclemandingo
I don't know what you're trying to do but your country's flag is really gay
HappyHomer
This Tokio Bowling team has one strict rule: Forget to wear your snazzy red 'n silver sneakers, and you have to carry the senior team member on your back all day.
Roscoe
The Olympic committee never really warmed up to Freestyle Douchebaggery as a medal event.
toacosmo
What Barrack Obama DIDN'T mention is that he's actually a robot controlled by microscopic Mexican immigrants. This is his neck.
frmontano
What are you doing? Not there but down there you fool! or Not pictured-God with a pencil
nervousnerd
The newest bailout plan only required $13 and a $25 gift certificate to WalMart. Field tests in mall parking lots have shown this plan sufficient to distract over 61% of broke-ass Americans.
diddy0071
The Chinese will never know why their version of American Idol doesn't get the ratings the US one gets.
princess4evr
Look at me! I'm balancing this pole on my head!! Oh shit... Carlos!! I'm gonna need some help here!!
LummoxJR
Undaunted by the small size of their squad, the Korean male cheerleading team goes to their first competition without even one rehearsal.
LummoxJR
A foreign rip-off of the Amazing Race gets off to a bad start when the first flight out departs early.
ironslick
Yea, whence the apocolypse cometh, thou shalt see great signs and mysteries. Crowds will gather, flags will fly, and the sky will rain negros and latinos, so sayeth the lord.
bydonn
"...And, later in the newcast, how this simple street act turned into a bloody massacre when someone shouted, 'it's official, Cloris Leachman was voted off!'....back to you, Jim."
Anthony_H
So...The Chinese used little girls for gymnastics...But the Philippine team had a different idea for the male events...
porsche
Although they had been coworkers for years, Bob now saw Juan in a whole new way.
Xsin13
The Homeless feel bad for themselves when there eating from garbage cans and bathing in park fountains. But when they perform.... their on top of the world.
DamnitDog
I told you already, the chosen one is not in there! Now get down here and keep looking.
threedollarbill
Where will you be when diarrhea strikes? (submitted simply so Qwiber's plea for votes won't win)
yanksking17
The Harlem Globetrotters were the main attraction at this years gay pride parade.
Schmofo
Macy's crack Lighter-Than-Air Gyno team performs the annual pap smear on the parade's trademark Rosie O'Donnell balloon.
lloydjermy
The largest prison in Vietnam puts on its yearly production of The Wizard Of Oz
iceman_419
If you call the number on the back of his shirt you can get delivery from a great Chinese restaurant.
iceman_419
I don't have any Yuans but I see a whole bunch of Wans over there! I'm a genius I know.
huntsvegas
For the last time this is why we do not allow the japanese to touch the festivus pole!
Sylocat
Say what you want about Japan, their halftime festives look a lot more fun than ours.
CleanHarry
The purple and white jumpsuits made Phil and Fred a little self-conscious, but they quickly shook it off
SlappyMcGee
They told Tran a million times NOT to wear the blue metal helmet under the yellow electron magnet, but he just wouldn't listen.
bydonn
Rare photo of retarded Lilliputians foolishly falling for the "Yellow Brick 'Pole" trick again....
rms16270
See, internment camps aren't so bad. We do pyramids, fly kites, everybody has a good time.
Truthiness
This is where you absolutely, positively, under any circumstances, do NOT want to be when diarrhea strikes.
rms16270
"Jim, you promised you wouldn't dump on my head, but that looks an awful lot like poop coming out of your ass. Jim? Jim?! JIM!! NO!! NOOOOOOO!!!!"
Atropos
Our skills in engineering are second only to our skills in theoretical practices in quantum mechanics.
raptorgt
Huflung Pu and the California Rolls bust'n some smooth street moves as Mothra rolls up for a breakdance battle-royale.
sofaking
Damn. 3 o' clock is such an inconvenient time to place a craption. plus I think of funny things later in the night.
bog
Lee's career as a circus performer was tragically cut short when the huge stick stuck in Bono's ass finally fell out and clocked him square in the head.
ninjaman
Just when you think you understand the theme CRACKED is going for, they toss you a curve ball...
The_Entertainer
It was at that moment the Korean Hobo Gymnastics Team learned the value of practice, planning, and not doing heroin prior to a competition.
The_Entertainer
The demonstrative portion of the tribe's mandatory sex-ed program is just as much a spectacle now as it was thousands of years ago at its inception.
spacecadet
Just at the moment they had their act together, God Farted and the sky turned black. Felipe cringed and looked up. "Oh Criminy!" he said, and lost his balance.
boredindenmark
While Tim balanced the pole, steve and jake spotted from the sides. Paul kept his eye on the prize and saw where he was going put his pole
insanetwist
The results of a couple of beers, watching the olympics on television, and a small voice saying "we could do that"
bamentt
I think that if the guy jumps out of the window, the four of us could catch him.
Mastika
Elephant Basketball http://papenss.blogspot.com/2008/11/elephant-basketball.html
Yovin4
I got in one little fight and my mom got scared, And said You’re movin’ with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air.
vynsane
Oh shit, it's the alien from 'The Abyss' - quick, get some Asians in swish pants after it!
slinker07
"Gabe, do you really think putting your 'Fangs up, Cobra style' is the best use of your time right now?!"
outsider22583
Not wanting to feel the wrath of Zues, the townspeople sacrificed the weakest of the bunch, so that all the town might once again find peace.
outsider22583
With the economy being the way it is, the mexican workers by the liquor store had to find a new way to earn a living...
outsider22583
Damn it! I didnt mean for it to be taken literally when I said "What would you do for a Klondike Bar?"!!!
outsider22583
Wow! so now I finally know what the process is to make a package of Top Ramen....
outsider22583
No matter how many people you stack on yourself to make yourself look bigger, you will still have a small penis Youk!
shedofwork
While we were distracted by looking for weapons of mass destruction, that's when the gay bomb hit......
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