Then you too can release rad underground scare videos like this one:
I got chills. Of course, I get chills whenever I hear a digitized voice. Remember when Chers Life After Love was on the radio like every other song? Not a comfortable time for me.
Anonymous really sells the hacker image, complete with a threatening coda and blatant disregard for public safety. The only bit I really find hard to buy is the we do not forget. I mean, most programmer kids I know forgot about everything they were doing the second Portal came out.
And for all the appearance of being a massive, organized, Internet force, the comments at the end of this interview make it clear to me that Anonymous is more of a group in the spiritual sense. You join by saying youve joined, and then you just kind of do what you do in the name of the group. Like me: I collect and paint turn-of-the-century wooden train figurines. AND I DO NOT FORGIVE.
But, hey, lets hope they get some people off of Cruise Control. Its an admirable aim; I just dont think Id be too eager to quit my religion because this guy asked me to:
Theyre kind words, but Im kind of afraid the whole time that hes going to lift up that visor and just be a skull. Again, its almost certainly the creepy music, which seems to be a recurring motif in anti-scientology work. The best example I could find is this thing about all the people Scientology has killed, which I could take a lot more seriously if it didnt use the Requiem for a Dream song. When you have to push your beliefs with such obvious fear tactics as reminding me of the movie that ruined my taste for ass-to-ass, my conspiracy antennae tend to extend.
Which isnt to say Scientologists arent still nuts:
Its definitely going to be an interesting struggle to follow, at least until all the Anonymous members are distracted by a new LOLcat on 4Chan (this one has three cats, a computer, and corms!).
Now lets hope some guys from Anonymous find this post, decide it insults them, and light up the comments section. Then maybe Cracked will give me a raise and I can afford a can of hairspray and a lighter to combat the nest of bats in my office.
I know. They spring for an office, but they leave the bats. Its crazy.
When not blogging for Cracked, Michael makes underground cyberpunk videos as head writer and co-founder of Those Aren't Muskets!