What if WalMart Made a Movie (or Jack O'Brien works for a living)
So as I've mentioned to those of you who are my Facebook friends, HBN is winding its way to an extended and possibly indefinite sabbatical. After this, there are five episodes left. But before I left I had to sing the praises of Cracked's editor in chief, Jack O'Brien.
I've known Jack for over three years now. He lobbied (really unsucessfully) for this piece to be run in the first issue of the ill-fated Cracked magazine relaunch. In the end, a decision was made to go with half-assed photoshops and de-fanged Spy articles instead. But still, how could I not love Jack for that?
Jack understands comedy. He knows how to make suggestions that fall short of directives in the hopes of stoking a creative process. Unfortunately, he does not know how to run a really funny, well done clip on the home page. Actually, that's not true. After reading last week's somewhat functionally illiterate responses to Worst HBN Ever, I think he made the right choice. (Psss! I didn't actually think last week's HBN was the worst ever when I titled it "The Worst Ever").
Anyhoo, back to Jack. Know what else Jack does? Works on the weekend. Like this weekend when the wildly talented Ian Cooper couldn't do the HBN photoshop, Jack and intern Karly both worked to create the needed sight gag. Bless you both. You're doing God's work.
Oh, and Jack listens to me bitch. A lot. About a lot of different things. All the time.
So this HBN is dedicated to Jack. Or as Dob calls him, "Jack." (What, you think DOB's always on)?
And it's fitting because this HBN was Jack's idea, and I even reshot a joke pursuant to his direction. So if you hate it, be sure to message him.
Wal-Mart Makes The Worst Movie of All-Time -- powered by Cracked.com
Well written post, looks brilliant on my iPhone as well.
Reply?? ??... ??? ??? ? ?????????: ?????? ? ?????, ? ??? ? ?????? :)
ReplyThanks for a great blog! Checkout my site if like. Really a nice design and content you got here...
ReplyHoly shit that's a real movie? I thought they were advertising hopeless patriotism.
ReplyMe too. I thought it was funny when I thought that it was made up. When I found it was real I almost s**t my pants. Who the f**k gave the green light to make that steaming pile of propaganda?
Okay, the last five seconds were hysterical. That part about American Pride 2 just genius.
ReplyYou edited out Mr. Belding from saved by the bell and a bunch of other pretty funny moments, however you do get laugh out loud points for the Naked Gun insert. Watch the full trailer on youtube.
Reply@Gladstone: "HBN IS NOT GETTING CANCELED...." I stand corrected and did not intend to imply that HBN was ending due to any deficiency on your part. My apologies.
ReplyFYI, I've enjoyed all your contributions to this site and will be sad if more talent leaves Cracked. Enjoy your upcoming sabbatical.
I wish I were an American, now. This movie made me tingle in all the right places (and two of the wrong places).
ReplyWell, G-Rocks, what a difference a week makes, eh? The front page comments are, like, positive. Congrats.
ReplyNow the initial shock has worn off (possibly indefinite sabbatical), I'm excited for you. It'll be fun to see what you do next, or in the interim, or whatever. Somebody mentioned stalking; you have plenty of time to provide updates, young man, as to where one may find you in the future. (I came in late to the whole Lex thing but there seems a mighty bunch of confusion out there. You know?)
Really fun HBN!
"You can’t look at Naked Gun the same anymore knowing Simpson’s nasty crime of stealing."
ReplySomeone once said that after his first 'brush' with the law that they could probably just watch the first 10 minutes, when he gets shot and falls off the boat, turn the movie off and think of it as a good ending.
Does anyone else get reminded of a video game trailer when they listen to the music being played during the "you're a Navy Seal" line and especially the music just after?
ReplyIn fact, if the trailer is anything to go by the entire score feels like video game.
Jmz Cltn: the song is "The Night" by Morphine
ReplyWhy no more HBN? Are you still going to be blogging?
ReplySo it's a season finale (five weeks from now), not a series finale. Gotcha.
ReplyNote: NEVERMIND. Upon a second viewing and cursory reading of comments, I am shocked I didn't hear the joke before. No need to risk inappropriate conversations with minors. (Unless you want to, anyway)
ReplyHBN IS NOT GETTING CANCELED. My contract calls for 5 more, and I'm opting not to renew at this time in order to pursue other things.
ReplyYou can't look at Naked Gun the same anymore knowing Simpson’s nasty crime of stealing.
ReplyAnd way to go offending Asians twice in one number.
That really is a bomb you nonchalantly dropped.
ReplyAnyhoo, I didn't get the joke at first either..
It's Monday and there's no sign of the H.M. article Daniel O'Brien promised and now HBN is getting canceled? Geeez.
ReplyI foresee faithful Cracked readers storming the castle with pitchforks and torches in the near future.
Gladstone, I hope that HBN ending doesn't mean you're leaving this site, because then we'd all have to start stalking you.
Hee hee...happy ending...
Reply