Rob Lowe's Brother's Girlfriend Having Affair with Val Kilmer's Mother's Son?!
Actor and celebrity brother Chad "Not the Sex with Teenagers One" Lowe recently lashed out at rumors that his ladyfriend Kim Painter has been having a torrid affair with none other than Val Fucking Kilmer:
The Unfaithful star's producer beau was recently photographed out and about with 48-year-old Kilmer---but Lowe has vehemently denied any romantic relationship between his partner and the Alexander star.
First of all, there's just no way that Val Kilmer is 48---I don't care what the birth certificate says, he'll always be that glistening young gay volleyball stud from Top Gun to me. But more importantly, I feel for Mr. Not-Rob, since the thought of competing with a chiseled piece of man-meat like Val is daunting to say the least. It's no Top Secret that you'd have to be either a Saint or a Real Genius in Heat or be living in Wonderland to stack up against a Thunderheart like him. Either that or Batman Forever on the Red Planet.
Don't believe me? Let's just take a look at the kind of raw animal magnetism that no girlfriend of a famous dude's brother can hope to resist:
P.S. Madmartigan!
Interesting article. Were did you got all the in turn from... :)
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ReplyHEY! GIVE THE guy a BREAK for QUITTING SMOKING!! I read, within the last year or so, not long, that he'd smoked most of his adult life and finally managed to quit as he was approaching middle age. Everyone knows that quitting smoking also goes (most of the time) with significant weight gain and it's one SON OF A GUN to get rid of that weight. It's a triple whammy for him and the vast majority of other quitting smokers: 1) gain 20, 40 or more pounds just by eating what you always have, 2) face the challenge of losing that weight at a time of your life when your middle-aged metabolism is slowing down & you have to work SO much harder to lose the same weight and 3) last but not least, you have to resist the pervasive, powerful drive to smoke every waking moment. It's harder than HELL to accomplish all of these things. Having kids helps most. Anyway, these aren't excuses here, there never are, just some real reasons and genuine obstacles that all recently-quit smokers face. And HOORAY to everyone, includng Mr. Kilmer, who hangs in there and makes it. Better health, more energy, better-looking hair & skin color, longer & better quality of life, lower medical bills, more discretionary money (cigarettes are expensive) much less family worry, etc. I say, from one former smoker to another, at age 52, who managed to beat the smoking and the weight gain, THREE CHEERS TO YOU Mr. Kilmer and hang in there. Guaranteed: your kids will LOVE IT. Unless,(I think it was) Rosanne Rosanna Danna (sp?) used to say to close her segment of SNL many years ago, "Never Mind". If I've gotten the quote and speaker wrong, mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa.FYI: You GO, ":C"!
ReplyLEAVE VAL KILMER ALONE! :C
ReplyAND YOU GUYS WONDER WHY EVERY DAY SOMEONE IS KILLING THEIRSELF
ReplyITS OVER REMARKS LIKE THAT SO WHAT HE LOOK LIKE THAT
ITS CLEAR TO ME YOU GUYS DONT HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO OTHER THAN WORRYIN BOUT HOW PEOPLE LOOK WHEN THE MAN IN THE MIRROR DONT LOOK SO HOT SUM TIMES
WHY I THINK EVERYONES JUST MAD BECAUSE HE HAS MORE THAN A PRETTY FACE GOING FOR HIM .I MEAN FOR PETE SAKE THE MAN CAN DO SOMETHING OTHER THAN JUST TRY TO LOOK FABULOUS ALL THE TIME LIKE SOME AIRHEAD.I MEAN HE NEEDS TO TAKE CARE OF HIS HEALTH BUT AS LONG AS HE'S HEALTHY LEAVE HIM ALONE.HOW MANY OF YOU ON THIS BOARD ARE STILL THE PERFECT SPECIMEN THEY WERE TWENTY YEARS AGO?NOT ME THATS FOR SURE.SO I SAY LIVE AND LET LIVE.
ReplyHe is great!!! I love HIM!!!!
ReplyThanks, Wallsy! Now I don't have to not go through with my empty threat.
ReplyOh Cracked, you'll do ANYTHING to get a Val Kilmer story in.
ReplyWell, I tried to ignore it as much as I could, but I think I must finally admit it: Cracked bloggers really do hate women.
ReplyThe first time there's an excuse to post a pic of a hot guy and you have him morphing into the giant bug from the Slurm factory. Thanks a lot.
If there is not a mostly-naked picture of Jason Statham posted on this page shortly, I shall know what to do about it, sir!