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The Nooner: The Price Is Right, Sexy Halloween Costumes and "Deprogramming The Masses"

Awesome Video Of The DayWoman Freaks Out On The Price Is Right

What am I missing about The Price Is Right? What is it about this show that makes people completelylosetheirshit? Free stuff is great and all, but these people are practically speaking in tongues over winning matching furniture. We could all use an extra $20,000 here and there, but is it really worth announcing to the entire country that you have to "go potty"? You can't put a price on dignity, but I'm gonna say this woman's is worth about $5,000. If you subtract that - and all the applicable taxes - that means she probably earned a few thousand bucks for looking like a total moron on national television.

Come to think of it, that's actually a pretty good deal.

Somebody should hook her up with this guy and try to make them breed some sort of Price Is Right bercontestant. It'd be just like the Nazi eugenics program, only way funnier and resulting in much better morning television.

Sexy Halloween 2007With Halloween just around the corner, women are once again asking themselves the age-old question: "What type of sexy thing am I going to be this year?" I've got good news and I've got bad news, ladies. First the bad news: The whole "sexy nurse" thing is totally clich. The good news, though: The internet is full of other perfectly "sexy" alternatives. This week on the Cracked blog I'll be counting down five "sexy" possibilities for your "sexy" consideration. Let's get into it, shall we?Sexy Costume #5: Sexy Black WidowPinupgirlclothing.com knows that nothing says "sexy" like one of the most venomous spiders in all of North America. Sure to lure men into your web of emotional instability stemming from a tumultuous relationship with your father, the Sexy Black Widow costume sends a very clear message to potential suitors: "I may have these stupid-looking black things attached to my arms, but that doesn't mean I'm not dressed like a total slut right now."

Sure To Attract Guys Dressed Up Like: Firemen, The Killer From Scream, Any Sort Of Insect

Sexy Factor (out of 10): 3

Wild Card

I love a good conspiracy theory, but I prefer it when they're at least marginally believable. The moon landing was a hoax? I can buy that. Tupac is still alive? I wouldn't be surprised. The Earth is actually flat? There's probably some truth to tha- wait... what?

So says the Flat Earth Society, a group that, according to their website, has been "Deprogramming the masses since 1547." I'm willing to keep an open mind here, but between their incomprehensible "Why A Flat Earth?" page and their still-under-construction "Evidence" page I'm having a hard time buying into this. Then again, I haven't really been feeling like myself lately. Maybe my four humours are out of wack or something.

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Ross Wolinsky

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