The 7 Most Ridiculous Things About Calling Out Fake Fangirls

Let's Talk About Whores

According to its advocates, "whore" is a great word. And they're right because it's useful. It's like a hazard sign for other people: you instantly know to avoid the person using that word without exposing yourself to too much of their poison. Comics writer and commentator Dirk Manning reposted this meme ...

via Dirk Manning. Original source unknown but an asshole

... then carefully mansplained that "whore" isn't sexist. It's true that "whore" is a powerfully charged word with many layers of socio-economic meaning, and can be distracting, so I've prepared a quick flowchart to simplify it:

You don't call someone a whore for wearing revealing clothes. You don't call him or her a whore for enjoying attention. (Both arguments apply to me, by the way -- I'm writing this in my boxers.) You don't even call her a whore if she's a woman you're paying for sex, because that's just good sense. You're polite to taxi drivers, and you're only getting inside their car. Because you know that they can make the ride more expensive and less pleasant for you. And if you think your partner's mood doesn't affect things once you're having sex anyway, well, now we know why you have to pay for it.

It's also applied to the booth babes, the models hired to wear costumes at events. Some people complain that they're not real geeks. I assume that they also hunt down the workers who put up Assassin's Creed posters and demand that they detail Desmond's insane plot or be branded as hypocrites.

Ubisoft hired real archers to install this ad, and to make any "in the knee" jokes agonizingly literal.

"Whore" is used throughout comics and gaming fandom, but even to the most sexist mind it's a backfiring insult. Because the guy is admitting that she has something valuable while he can't even give his away. And if women are whores for dressing up as female comics characters, what would that make the people who created those costumes and sent them out to make money?

Geeks Aren't a Minority

Many man-child warriors take a defensive tone about these "invaders," but you don't get to claim that you're a minority when The Avengers made more money than a dozen countries this year. Video games have midnight launches reported in the news. There was a struggle against geekery, and the geeks won. We won so hard that our only complaints are about Hollywood making billion-dollar movies of our stuff too fast.

DC, Warner Bros
Damn them for making such awesome stuff about our favorite things!

Bringing up gender in comics fandom should be like mentioning your favorite ice cream flavor during a football conversation: irrelevant, and revealing you to be a child. Except children can still like comics without being assholes about it.

The Tragedy

The tragedy of territorial geeks is that they found the wonderful world of fantasy, then missed its point. Some people really are the stereotypical geeks, escaping socially awkward childhoods by finding funner things to do. I was the last picked for football, was occasionally thumped because people found it funny and can talk for a full hour about my favorite Doctor Who original novels. Only that last part still affects my life, and it's awesome. But some people escaped into a world without bullying, and instead of thinking "Great," they thought, "My turn."

"Back off, noob, there's only ONE Harry Potter/Where's Waldo? mashup expert in THIS house."

You can't be a better fan than anyone else anymore. Memorizing issue numbers was always useless, but in a world with Wikipedia, it's outright embarrassing. The whole point of liking things is to enjoy them. More people means more fun. Even if you're a total sociopath, more people in your hobby means more products for you to enjoy. And if you want to turn it into a fight, someone who likes a character and creates a costume is actually closer to the comics creators than someone who just likes the character.

If you base your self-esteem on how much of a fan you are, neither of those words really apply to you.

Luke also studies Sexual Martial Arts and mocks The 6 Worst Motivational Posters Every Made By Man. He has a website, tumbles and responds to every single tweet.

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Luke McKinney

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