#2. Fallout 3 -- Exploding the Elderly
I'm not sure I've ever gotten as much enjoyment out of a concept this simple before in my life. I've played the Fallout series, and I loved every second of them, but if you were somehow able to compile all the happiness that hundreds of hours of gameplay has brought me, it would not compare to this five-minute video of the player repeatedly blowing up an old man with a giant pile of frag mines.
It's so damn simple, but I can't stop watching it. Step one -- drop a few dozen frag mines on the ground:
Step two -- fire off a round at the old man to make him get up and come at you:
Oh, suck it, you old bastard! Eat sky!
And then he just keeps doing it. Over and over again. Frag. Shot. BOOM! Old man flopping through the sky. And I laugh every goddamn time. Each time, glancing down at the time bar to make sure it wasn't the last one. "Is he going to do it again? Hell yes, he is. And I am going to enjoy every second of -- " BOOM!
OH, HOW DO THOSE CLOUDS TASTE, ASSHOLE?!
I should probably stop watching these. People will start to think I'm a little -- oh, hey! A sequel:
#1. Minecraft -- The Cat Fountain
This is why video games were invented. Everything we have ever done with graphics, AI, storytelling, physics, sound design ... it has all been in preparation of this solitary act of game manipulation. The Cat Fountain. Make sure your speakers are on because once that thing gets going, you will never see or hear a more perfect form of video game comedy in your life. This is it. This is the apex of our evolution. This is comedy Rapture.
It's done by manipulating these simple rules of the Minecraft universe: if you make cats in creative mode, they follow you around. And if you get too far away from them, they will teleport to you. So if you build a virtual Tower of Babel to the game's ceiling, leaving only a single square's thickness at the top, when the cats port onto it, they immediately fall off and re-teleport back up there. If you get enough cats going at once ... Cat Fountain.
This page also represents everything that is wrong with the world. Not the video itself, mind you. It's what's under it:
The fact that those 20 people exist frightens me. That there are sincerely 20 people in the world who watched that video, pondered it for a second, and thought, "That's stupid." It's not that they exist as individuals -- they represent a larger blight found at the fringes of every community, staring in with gritted teeth and bloodshot eyes, ready to tear down anything that represents fun and originality. Those 20 people are the barbed wire that will always stop a utopian society from forming.
Cat Fountain exposes that darkness in ways philosophy and activism never could. With a smattering of meows and a flowing spill of tails and fur, Cat Fountain is a reflection of what we are ... and an encouraging vision of what we could be.
Thanks to the posters in this thread for helping find these, feel free to go in there and post your own. John has a Twitter and a Facebook Fan Page. Both of which are certain to win him a Pulitzer Prize in Internet thing-typing.