Tales To Tell 'Round Midnight: The Winter After The Summer The Shock Shack Shocks Back

Read what happened the summer before the summer the Shock Shack shocked back HERE or don't.

Winter will be cold the winter after the summer the Shock Shack shocked back. It will be the kind of cold winter that will make all of the main characters think of nothing else but what happened several months earlier when it was not cold or winter and the Shock Shack shocked back. There will not be anything particularly terrifying going on, although everyone will still be so very terrified from several months earlier when the Shock Shack shocked back.

Craigory Moremore, for example, will be incredibly scared of even opening his front door and peering out, though not so scared that he wouldn't go to his mailbox. In fact, Craigory will be checking his mailbox right around the time the story starts, which will be not much more than a paragraph or so describing the scary winter. Craigory will return from his mail box, mail in hand. He will be out of breath because he will have run (because he will have been so scared).

The narrator realizes that this is confusing because of the very nature of the way the story's being told, but it is mainly confusing because nowhere in the previous tale concerning Shock Shacks was there a character named "Craigory." He wants to stress that everyone changed their names after the Shock Shack shocked back. There's not really a better way to say that, because he's already brought it up and he can't really write himself out of it because he's horrible at this. So, yeah, everyone's name is different.

"Wow," the narrator spoke and smiled to himself. "This is good stuff."

So at some point Craigory will have already opened some of his mail. One will be a bill for any number of things and another will be a page of coupons for any number of things. He will not know what any of the mail is, for he will be too scared, you see. He will simply glance at the piece of mail, scream a bit, and then throw it in the garbage. At a certain moment, he will have several pieces of mail left to scream near.

Craigory will scream as he throws a piece of mail away.

Craigory will scream again as he throws another piece of mail away.

It will be at this point that Craigory will have thrown away all of his mail except for one piece, near which he will not scream. He will not scream near the piece of mail, because it will not be frightening to him in the least. The shade, the shape, the weight, and everything else about it will seem to scream, "Don't scream near me."

For the first time since the Shock Shack shocked back, Craigory will consider opening a piece of mail.

* * * * * *

Across town, Jammy will be sitting silently in her apartment, excellently ignoring the incessant hoots and howls that will be coming from her husband in the other room.

"I'm not listening to you, you beast!" she will shout as she begins to ignore the incessant hoots and howls rather poorly.

Jammy's husband, Lammy Hundrend, will have been locked in the other room ever since the Shock Shack shocked back, because he was a bit of a 'roided out freak and he will continue to be a 'roided out freak. Jammy will not feel safe near anything, let alone some 'roided out freak.

"Baby, please!" Lammy will howl. "I ate my last steroids yesterday! I'm starving in here!"

"You should have thought of that before the Shock Shack-"

"-shocked back! Yeah, I was there, you horrible WENCH!" Lammy will shout, not being able to become angrier or more terrified if he were to have just eaten steroids.

"You're the wench, you bitch!" Jammy will counter. She will also be very angry, although if she were to eat steroids, she would most likely become much angrier and maybe even more terrified. But that's just their marriage, you know? They're very different from each other and that's why it works. It's like that old saying, "Contradictory beings cause interest in one another."

Lammy will continue howling at Jammy as-

"Oh, this'll be cool!" the narrator shouts with glee (as in "delight," not like the person).

So in regards to them all changing their names, the narrator would like to point out that he is not going to specify what they changed their names from. He is probably trying to hint that maybe they changed their names after the summer before the summer the Shock Shack shocked back and then they changed those names after the summer the Shock Shack shocked back.

"Awesome," the narrator smiles again. "Reverse foreshadowing."

Jammy will be ignoring Lammy's hoots and howls rather well again. She will sit in silence as he hoots and howls his 'roided-out little head off. She will smile a terrified smile.

At that very moment, however, something will happen on the other side of the door. You see, for the first time since the Shock Shack shocked back, Lammy will think about being quiet for a bit.

At that very same moment, back on the side of the door we started out on, something else will happen. For the first time since the Shock Shack shocked back, Jammy will consider unlocking the door.

* * * * * * *

Across town, near Craigory's home, Pierre will weep into his scared little hands. He will feel like a baby because he will be acting like a baby.

The narrator reverse foreshadows that although Pierre was named Pierre the summer before the summer the Shock Shack shocked back, he still changed his name after that summer and THEN he changed his name again after the summer the Shock Shack shocked back. This time it's pronounced "pear."

For the first time since the Shock Shack shocked back, Pierre will think about not pronouncing it "pear."

The end.