The 10 Lamest Super Bowl XLII Ads (Part 2)
Monday, February 4th, 2008Swaim: Thriller references never go out of style. Didn’t you see that YouTube video of those prisoners? Come to think of it, this commercial would have been better with a bunch of dancing CG Malaysian prisoners.
Wolinsky: Malaysian prisoners are inherently more entertaining than CG lizards. Don’t they teach that in advertising school?
Swaim: I think the implication here is that drinking Life Water can actually raise the dead.
Wolinsky: Bullshit. This was clearly the product of a cocaine-fueled brainstorming session. By 6:30 a.m. all they had on the whiteboard was “PEOPLE LIKE: 1.) Chicks 2.) CG Lizards 3.) Zombies.” They might be right, but this is still a conceptual nightmare.
Wolinsky: Also, why isn’t the CHICK a zombie?
Swaim: The lizard would have to bite her for that to happen, and lizard zombies are only attracted to lizard brains. I’m expecting some fanfic on this.
Wolinsky: Yeah, well, there’s no shortage of fan fiction… for THINGS THAT SUCK.
Swaim: To my knowledge, this is the first ever superbowl ad to go meta. If you won’t get behind something as fresh and groundbreaking as that, at least get behind the promise of pornography at the end.
Wolinsky: I can get behind the promise of internet pornography, but I’m more into dated pop culture references to “wardrobe malfunctions.”
Swaim: Sigh. Just watched the linked video at GoDaddy.com. No porn. But I DID find wider exposure and a great webspace at rock bottom pricing!
Wolinsky: Classic bait-and-switch. They reel you in with the porn, then they sell you a great hosting package.
Swaim: This is so exciting that I’m going to huddle around the computer with eight or nine of my closest friends, faces nearly touching, to read about it.
Wolinsky: Will it be an ethnically-diverse group of both males AND females? Oh, wait - these people are all white.
Swaim: Yeah, but at least they’ve got the lesbian demographic going. One step at a time, Ross. Next you’ll be wanting black people to fly.
Wolinsky: Let’s not get carried away.
