Here's a shot of Kim Catrall right after one of her nauseated male suitors vomits blood from the sight of her.
Undeterred, Kim starts hitting on blind men. Unfortunately, this dude's guide dog has to look away.
In a show of solidarity, Sarah Jessica Parker slips in the the fugliest, anorexia-accentuating, erection-obliterating outfit in creation. Apparently, Pippi Longstocking is all grown up, and not even crystal meth gets her blood to circulate.
At about the movie's halfway mark, the producers trick the audience's male genitalia out of hiding with younger stand-ins.
And then the ladies return to remind us true beauty knows not the ravages of time. Now THAT'S what I'm talking about! I want to make sweet love. (To that airbrush.)
...oh, and if your penis isn't dead yet, you can check out the new Spice Girls Video here.