Ross Wolinsky: Wacky Blogger or The Anti-Christ?
Sure, there's a lot to hate about my co-bloggers: Michael Swaim's virulent racism; Chris Buckholz's obsession with child pornography (That's what Heroes is about, right? I've never seen it), and Ian Cooper's inability to tell black hats from white ones.
But if I had to focus my hatred squarely on one of my peers, I'd to have to go for Ross Wolinsky. "What? The wacky clip guy?" you say. "Surely, he never hurt anyone."
Well, of course, Ross seems harmless. That's his trick. If the devil blogged about murdered children that would be too obvious! But Ross with his invisible tacos and handicable breakdancers has moved in under the radar --- purveying his evil directly to the masses.
Specifically, I'm referring to his Halloween post where he brought us this clip:
(BTW, you'll notice that I reproduced the clip in full size. Was that so hard, Wolinsky? Why so stingy? No wonder Swaim calls you a cheap Jew bastard behind your back.) Anyway, seems like just a harmless little bit of horrible music brought to you by Mr. Wolinsky, right? Maybe to you. Maybe to me. But what about the children? Ross has completely ignored the damage that could ensue by putting forth such video. I offer, as proof, my son who had been enjoying The Beatles, David Bowie, and The Pirates of the Caribbean soundtrack before Ross came into our lives. Now he spends his days alone in our basement doing this all day long:
Damn, you Wolinsky. Damn you straight to Hell.
For me one of the best painters who every lived, such a sad story for such a talented person.
ReplyHmm, i'm rather split with my loyalties.
ReplyOn the one hand Gladstone comes across as a dapper gent, and I usually work in Gladstone Street in my home city, so it reminds me of earning money.
Yet Ross shares my first name. And you can't beat that.
YET, Michael Swaim gave me some excellent advise on dealing with T-Rex's.
Oh and Ian Cooper and Chris Bucholz are cool. I suppose.
Ah to hell with it, I love you all.
Hah!
ReplyThanks GMan!
Replylol
ReplyAndy, if I "post after" you instead of "postafter" you as you suggest, then i just suck dick soft core, right? That's a relief.
ReplyAnd GMan, I want you to be honest with me. If you think I'm the best Cracked blogger and the rest all suck, just give me a sign. Just say "lol" and nothing more.
Last what?
ReplyWhat was that?
ReplyApparently Captain there has been another post from the future.
When will these people they are endangering their existence as well as ours?
I have no idea Captain but as I was saying our presence here has thwarted Mr. Andy Pants
attempt to change the sexual persuasion of the blog writer Gladstone.
Well at least our being here has done some good ,I guess. Mr. Data I want you to see if you
can modify our forward deflector to emit a tachyon pulse, possibly to send these "writers" a
message informing them of the destruction they are causing.
Yes Captain.
And Mr. Data please expedite your efforts to get us out of of this horrid place as soon as possible.
Yes Captain, I understand completely, I will endeavor to do my best sir.
Make it so.
Mr. Data please apprise me of the situation.
ReplyCaptain, it seems that the rift in the space time continuum is growing. There have been three more posts from the future.
Cause?
It appears that two blog writers, blog writing was a semi national past time late 20th and early 21 first centuries.......
Unfortunately, I'm aware of what blog writings were. Please continue.
Yes Captain, It appears that two 21 first blog writers are ripping holes in the space time continuum to bolster their fragile egos.
Are they not aware of the danger this poses to us all?
No Captain, apperantely they are not.
Anything else?
Yes Captain, one of the commenter's here, a Mr. Andy Pants, seems to want to turn one of the bloggers into a homosexual.
Well that makes no sense.
You have something to add Commander Riker?
Well Captain I thought that all blog writers were homosexuals.
No Commander Riker that was a common misconception, due to the high levels of sexual frustration among them. Please continue Mr. Data
Our presence here has thwarted Mr. Andy Pants attempt at changing the sexual persuasion
Hey, Gladstone, if you want to admit to the world that you really suck dick, hardcore, just postafter me.
ReplyWhat was that?
Replylolz
Replyits just not right the way you people after me toy with the system.
ReplyCheaters!!!!!
ReplyWait a minute dammit , now he's laughing at me !!! Well I'll show his ass I'll just wait until 12/12/07 at 6:49PM then I'll laugh at him. Well Goddammit wait, If I submit this comment then he will just be laughing at me again.I just won't look until then . HAH!
ReplyWell now he is laughing at the visible taco.
ReplyI'm still waiting on the explanation of the visible taco.
ReplyCome on, Ross. It's not like you aren't at the Taco Bell half the day anyway. Be a responsible blogger.
And he's laughing at us FROM THE FUTURE!!! ........................... SEE!
Replyright. dude. for some reason the time stamps got all effed. He commented last night but in the future.
Replyohhhh. Its because its listing them in chronological order, and Gmans will be the last, timewise until the 12th.
Reply