When you think Law and Order: Special Victims Unit, a few images come to mind: the pale body of a ravaged young woman, kids on witness stands pointing to various parts of dolls, and the eccentric but whimsical son of a deceased toy mogul.
What’s that? That last one? Why, it’s simply Mr. Robin Williams’ newest genre-testing experiment in “taking whatever role they give me.” Ever since he blue-balled me by NOT raping that couple at the end of One Hour Photo, I for one have been eagerly awaiting this moment.
And I’m already making predictions about the landmark 200th episode. One writer has said that he “couldn’t imagine anyone else in the role.” From that, I think it’s safe to assume that Williams will be playing a psychotically split child molester who can speak only in impressions of outdated celebrities and is sustained by a bottomless stash of cocaine.
And to those who see this as a bad fit, I point to SVU’s long tradition of casting faded comedians as sexual deviants. Jerry Lewis, Bob Saget, Chevy Chase and Martin Short have all taken turns playing “bad boys” on the old L&O. Dunn dunn indeed.
In the end, what I’m most excited about is the inevitable 300th episode, wherein Jim Carey will portray an animated elephant with an unfortunately roaming trunk.
When not blogging for Cracked, Michael tracks the decline of more successful comedians as head writer and co-founder of Those Aren’t Muskets!
This entry was posted on Friday, March 21st, 2008 at 8:00 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
How I Spent My Summer Vacation, By Michael Swaim (Age 24)
September 29th, 2008 at 5:07 am
Moscow on the Hudson, actually a very good movie for Williams.
I will add Good Will Hunting
But seriously, Popeye?
The big screen adaption of the one cartoon that all kids said “oh shit, why can’t it be tom and jerry” to?
April 5th, 2008 at 9:04 am
Animal Sex Free Animal Sex Stories Sex With Dogs…
I can not agree with you in 100% regarding some thoughts, but you got good point of view…
March 27th, 2008 at 7:17 pm
Ah, dammit. I wanted to be the one to bring up “Dead Again”. I’m always a day late and an obscure reference short!
March 25th, 2008 at 6:10 pm
What about Hook? Eh? Ehhh?
March 24th, 2008 at 6:39 pm
“Dead Again” was a fairly decent Robin Williams movie. He wasn’t a main character, though. Prob a good thing.
March 24th, 2008 at 4:11 pm
Actually, Jerry Lewis didn’t play a sexual predator, he played the uncle of one of the main characters who was suffering from dementia and ended up killing a sexual predator. But I only know this off the top of my head because the episode was on just last night (because TV might as well just be renamed “the Law & Order Box”, since it’s ALL THAT’S ON EVER).
March 23rd, 2008 at 10:03 pm
Does no one remember Mork and Mindy? If you didn’t like it, then you hate Everything.
March 23rd, 2008 at 9:12 pm
Kurtwood Smith(the dad in dead poet’s society) has alway’s played a pretty good dbag.
His portrayal of Clarence Bodiker in RoboCop has always been one of my favorite villain portrayals on film. He was funny.
March 23rd, 2008 at 6:47 pm
I still liked the Dead Poet’s Society despite the fact that most people do not look past the surface apparent moral. Most people watch it and think, “Carpe Diem! We should live each day to the fullest!” But they miss the fact that there are always consequences to your actions…hence, suicide. Hence, crazy teacher loses his job. Etc.
March 23rd, 2008 at 6:13 pm
I despise Dead Poet’s Society. I actually blame the teacher for the kid’s suicide just as much as the dbag dad.
March 23rd, 2008 at 11:51 am
Wow, I guess I’m alone in thinking One Hour Photo blew nuts. It was shot beautifully, I’ll definitely give it that. But I thought the plot was confusing, the male nudity was unnecessary, the ending was total shite, and the good part was when he bought that anime action figure.
But I liked Aladdin and his Live on Broadway special so I guess my opinion’s worthless.
March 23rd, 2008 at 11:19 am
I liked Dead Poets Society…I thought it was pretty good actually.
March 23rd, 2008 at 9:39 am
Sorry, the Robin Williams hate is just uncool. Can I think of anything good he’s been in recently? No. Are all his interviews the same? Yep. But at some point in the early 80s, probably after Popeye, he became my favorite comedian. I thought he was completely brilliant, and the coke-fueled rambling was just the funniest thing EVAR. So he’s forever on a pedestal in my mind, even though he hasn’t done much worth noting in the last 10 years. And anyone who is responsible for the script of the Cracked News has very little room to talk about stale jokes. I’m just saying.
March 22nd, 2008 at 4:21 pm
popeye rules!
March 22nd, 2008 at 12:05 pm
my teacher thought ‘dead poets society’ was totally awesome. So i spent the next few years avoiding anything with robin williams in it, but then i stumbled upon ‘one hour photo’ and it was really good (i liked how he did not rape these people at the end).
Well, one great movie is not enough to redeem an entire cariere of making totally overblown ’sensitive’ movies that just don’t ressonate with anyone (except for some theachers apperently).
March 21st, 2008 at 10:34 pm
The genie…was obnoxious.
March 21st, 2008 at 6:20 pm
Hello!! Doesn’t anyone remember Aladin? That was one of the best movies he’s ever been in. Can you think of any one else who have kicked as much ass as a genie? He sings, he grants wishes and he fits in a lamp for your carrying convienience. What could possibly be better than that?
March 21st, 2008 at 4:32 pm
I have. I had to burn my way out with a magnifying glass and a flashlight.
I did NOT want to make a base camp.
March 21st, 2008 at 1:04 pm
I could get lost in Robin Williams’ torso hair for hours.
March 21st, 2008 at 1:03 pm
Gladstone you name some good films, but between pandering shit like RV and borderline-offensive ripoffs like Jakob the Liar, his career as a whole is pretty much a wash.
March 21st, 2008 at 12:43 pm
You can’t leave out Death to Smoochy, in part because Robin gets to play himself…
But even if you get sick of watching Robin Williams the rest of the cast puts in a good show. Who knew Danny Devito could direct?
March 21st, 2008 at 11:37 am
My favorite Robin Williams movie is Popeye, really. No joke.
March 21st, 2008 at 10:49 am
Really? hard to believe.i heard this news times from many friends playing on a tall dating site~~~~Tallmingle.com~~~,i did not believe, i think that they are know nothing but dating and love.
i am wrong.
March 21st, 2008 at 9:46 am
This is what I would save from the fire:
Garp
Good Morning Vietnam
Good Will Hunting
What Dreams May Come
One Hour Photo
Insomnia
Final Cut
March 21st, 2008 at 9:42 am
I know this is considered horrific blasphemy on this site, but I actually kind of like Robin Williams… sure, he’s been in a lot of crap, but he was great in One Hour Photo and a lot of his older films were pretty good for what they were.
March 21st, 2008 at 9:14 am
They just need to make a movie with Robin Williams entitled “Interview with the Madman” wherein some stiff Charlie Rose/ Larry King type character sits down Williams, asks him “How’re you doing?” and just watches as the answers to that one question fluctuate from lunacy-schtick like “Hitler with a dress on” to irreverant impersonations of obscure 70’s-80’s cultural icons, spewed forth from his mouth at a breakneck clip.
March 21st, 2008 at 8:56 am
I completely agree. Robin Williams is what’s wrong with America. Makes me sick etc etc. My god I hope that guy from the bad parenting blog wants to kill himself by now or I might just have to go on like this…
March 21st, 2008 at 8:46 am
Agreed, Gladstone. Who knew Robin Williams could play a disturbed personality so well? I would also like to add Death to Smoochie, but I ‘ve never actually seen that movie.
March 21st, 2008 at 8:42 am
Can i just say I thought Robin Williams was fantastic in One Hour Photo? Thank you. After that and Insomnia I was suprised and saddened to see him return to crap like RV and License to Wed.
March 21st, 2008 at 8:17 am
Too bad they don’t consider dogs special victims, otherwise you could play the bad guy. ‘Fucking dog holes is bad, especially anus. These are their stories’ *dun, dun*