By Brendan Fraser, Age 8
When I grow up, I want to be a movie actor. I know that a lot of kids say that, but I know that I will succeed, because I am not unrealistic about it like Tiffany, who says she wants to be as famous as Madonna. I don’t think Madonna’s even going to be famous that much longer anyway; not after that naughty Sex book my Dad bought and hides under his mattress.
The reason I think I can be an actor is because I have normal expectations. I don’t want to be a big dramatic actor, or even a big action star. All I want is to be that guy that people know his face, and some people know his name, but most people just go “oh, yeah, that guy.” This is my dream.
And instead of being in any serious movies, I just want to be in the kinds of movies that parents take their kids to the matinées of because they think it will be fun and have some action, but not be too violent. Like movies where there is some punching, but not lots, and all the shooting misses.
I would like to fight Mummies. In real life, but if that is not possible, at least in a movie.
Mummies are not that scary; they move slow and they are wrapped in toilet paper. So as an actor in the movie I could make a lot of jokes like “boy, you are slow,” and “you know what else is in toilet paper?” But then before I could say “poop” the ground would break or something and I’d fall and yell real goofy. The kids would like that, because it’s goofy, and the parents could laugh because they knew I was talking about poop.
Maybe Disney could produce my action movies. I think that would make sure my head never got too big, or I got to thinking I was a real movie hero. I just want to be regular. Instead of going to bars and clubs in Hollywood, I will go to the Applebee’s in Long Beach. And when I date ladies, they will be pretty, but not so pretty that the media makes a name out of both of our names to represent the couple.
In my movies, I will always have kids with me. That will keep me from swears. Also in my movies, I will always dress kind of the same: a khaki vest and stuff like Indiana Jones, but not as nice. That way, people will remember that I was in other movies that they saw.
When I do interviews, I will seem like I am not having a very good time, but just saying what the interviewer wants to hear. This will make me seem like I am smarter and more talented than the movies I am in, but that I just never get a fair shot. That way no one will really know how good I am (which is just okay). This will work at first, until later in my career when my interviews will just be painful to watch.
In my movies, the final answer to the riddle will always be friendship. This will teach families that friendship is the best thing.
Other best things I would like in my movies:
I think these things will make enough good movies that people will like me, but enough really bad movies that no one will really like me. That way, I can be nice to my fans that speak to me on the street, because I will be lonely.
After a long time, I will take a break from making these movies, because I may be sad that everyone always sees me and says “yeah, that guy. I kind of like him.” I will do some TV show appearances and maybe a dramatic art film where I am gay. This will surprise everyone, and prove that I have acting skill, because in real life I am not gay. Or am I? No one will care enough to find out.
But after a few years, I want to then go back to movies. I don’t think I will be able to be in great scripts, because I will already be known as the guy that does okay family action movies, and no studios will want to take a chance on me as a big star. But to make my comeback big, I will have to do something interesting, like maybe making TWO movies instead of one like usual.
Maybe one will be in 3-D. That will make people kind of like me even more than they did before.
And at the movie premieres I will wear suits that are nice, but not too nice, and only a few cameras will be there. But still, I will smile, because deep inside I will know that all along, this was my dream.
When not being prescient, Brendan Fraser has absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with sketch comedy troupe Those Aren’t Muskets!
Last 5 posts by Michael Swaim
- If You Wanna Make An Omelette, You Gotta Let Some Kids Get Molested - November 13th, 2008
- CNN Ushers In Era Of Incisive Reportage With New Holograms - November 12th, 2008
- The 7 Deadly Sins of Online Gaming - November 7th, 2008
- If McCain's Concession Speech Was As Bitter As His Campaign - November 6th, 2008
- Class War! A Handy Guide - October 30th, 2008
August 10th, 2008 at 5:00 pm
[...] - bookmarked by 1 members originally found by Heartlesz on 2008-07-20 Proof Brendan Fraser Is The Happiest Man Alive http://www.cracked.com/blog/2008/07/09/proof-brendan-fraser-is-the-happiest-man-alive/ - [...]
July 19th, 2008 at 12:04 pm
It is also a well-known fact that there are many hot sexy big boobs beauties, big booty hotties and their admirers on ___C A b i g s i n g l es . c o m___! I am also a hot Canadian BBW=big beautiful woman and I have so many admirers there! So happy and hope I will find my Mr. Right there!
July 16th, 2008 at 10:21 pm
Actually you guys, he can act, and pretty darn well, actually! See Gods and Monsters, and the Quiet American, amongst others if you don’t believe me. As for the rest of his career, he kinda reminds me of the typical guy from your office who always shows up on time, always does a good job for the company but has been in the same job for twenty years without a promotion - kind of like his character in Bedazzled actually. On the surface you might think, oh what a loser, but I don’t think we should in Brendan Fraser’s case. From what I’ve heard about him personally, I think this is the life he wants doing mostly fluff movies but still bringing in the box office receipts for his studio. Who know’s, maybe he is the happiest man alive?!
July 13th, 2008 at 3:24 pm
I dunno man, I say who ever is banging Angelina Jolee would be the happiest man. I know that would make ME the happiest man alive! LOL
http://www.FireMe.To/udi
July 13th, 2008 at 5:20 am
Now, now Swaim! Don’t you go talking about about ol’ Brendan. I think Crash has already been mentioned but I’m gonna mention it again damnit! That movie was awesome and he was awesome in that movie.
Also, I still love The Mummy movies
July 12th, 2008 at 7:26 pm
Wait, Swaim was talking about Brendan Fraser?!
I must have not been able to navigate my way around the subtle sarcasm.
Love you rele
July 12th, 2008 at 12:44 pm
Okay, Brendan Fraser is *clearly* tired in that interview. Not bored, not high, not drunk, but tired.
Whatever, I’ll defend him to my dying death! God Save Brendan!
July 11th, 2008 at 10:02 pm
“To all those people who say that Swaim’s mocking Brendan: how could he bring up the shittiness of the way Hollywood treats him in a way that was gentler than a letter written by his fake 8 year old self and is at the same time not horribly unfunny? If he made a Cracked-style list, it would’ve definitely been mocking, and if it wasn’t, it wouldn’t have been funny. As far as I can see, he did this in the most sympathetic way possible while at the same time remaining funny.”
but it wasn’t funny.
July 11th, 2008 at 8:29 pm
The Scout was the shit…Steve Nebraska was the most dominant movie baseball player ever.
July 11th, 2008 at 6:53 pm
To all those people who say that Swaim’s mocking Brendan: how could he bring up the shittiness of the way Hollywood treats him in a way that was gentler than a letter written by his fake 8 year old self and is at the same time not horribly unfunny? If he made a Cracked-style list, it would’ve definitely been mocking, and if it wasn’t, it wouldn’t have been funny. As far as I can see, he did this in the most sympathetic way possible while at the same time remaining funny.
July 11th, 2008 at 10:03 am
It’s a hot topic on the hot luxury dating site ★I n t e r r a c i a l L o v i n g . C O M ★ where
lots of successful men and women go there for love and business partnership
July 11th, 2008 at 2:20 am
Hi, guys, nice discussion, But it is new year now, would you love to try something new to celebrate these great days? How about interracial hot dating? mixed loving . c o m you will be surprised
July 10th, 2008 at 7:25 pm
I used to have a celebrity crush on him entill I was informed that my mother in law sleeps with a picture of him taped to a pillow and wrights slash fictions about them
I pitty him now
I hope he may he never find out about the 45y/o hippy “artist” who loves him
July 10th, 2008 at 6:58 pm
This article was kinda funny.
Somewhat true, too. However, I get the feeling that Brenden Fraiser is happier then most of you douchebags.
You can’t really dislike the guy. It’s not like we all know him as a hollywood dickwad.
And everything that I’ve seen him himwas decent enough. I cannot recall any of his roles that have fallen flat.
Basically, to be a good actor you need to be able to convince people that you are the character you are playing. Your acting can’t seem like it.
I wonder how many of those people who posit that Fraiser is a sad person arnt just venting their own inner angst on him because he’s the topic at hand?
Many, I’m sure.
True champions, that’s what they are.
July 10th, 2008 at 2:30 pm
dude, ur a douche
July 10th, 2008 at 12:50 pm
This belongs in the “It’s funny because it’s true” category. Which makes it kind of sad at the same time. The thing about Brendan is that he’s much more charming in real life than in film. He seems like such a smart, funny guy in all the interviews I’ve seen of him but in movies he tends to bury that charm under over-the-top goofiness.
PS
Blast from the Past is one of those movies that’s great to watch on a lazy weekend whenever TBS is showing it. It also stars the female Brendan Fraser, Alicia Silverstone. Another person who was on their way to the top and then just kind of got stuck in the middle.
July 10th, 2008 at 11:34 am
The term REMFs is more in the spirit of what I’m talking about but only old Army fuckers like me still know what it means. There is probably no one serving now outside of a few Generals that were in the Army when REMF was first used. REMF was first used in Vietnam and stands for Rear Echelon Mother Fucker. It is anachronistic now because there is no true rear in Iraq.
Fobbit is a modification from the term FOB, which stands for Forward Observation Base. Which are places of “relative” safety and are there are troops in Iraq that never leave them their entire tour and spend most of their time in huge reinforced bunkers. They went from being called FOBs to Fobbits and the bunkers, fobbit holes. Fobbits are found in every nationalities Army.
July 10th, 2008 at 9:31 am
What about school ties? Ok I couldn’t remember the title of it (thanks for your help google) but that was a serious role? He was the jew & Matt Damon was the hot prick.
July 10th, 2008 at 9:29 am
lol glendoor, fobbit holes..that’s hilarious. I could just see these little Casnadian soldiers sitting in their cozy fobbit holes with their short stature and hairy feet, smoking a pipe, while their compatriots are getting shelled outside.
At any rate, as I have never been in the army, I defer to your experience on the subject. Also because if it ever actually came to a fight, I’m pretty sure you would whoop me - although to get to me you would have to penetrate the fobbits at the impenetrable Canadian border of course.
July 10th, 2008 at 2:00 am
No, I’m pretty sure Dave’s talking about life in general.
July 10th, 2008 at 12:22 am
No no no Dave, that’s Chapelle’s Show.
July 10th, 2008 at 12:12 am
No, he’s in the one where everybody hates Mexicans and black people.
July 10th, 2008 at 12:08 am
Is the Crash movie that Brendan Fraser is in the one where James spader fucks Rosanna Arquette in the leg?
July 9th, 2008 at 11:48 pm
J-Pappi–Believe it or not–she’s alive, and hasn’t yet found the secret cache. And I don’t actually have a brother either! (You can have my sisters–although you might not want them. I at least admit I’m a bit messed up!)
Neil–You’re completely right about Scrubs being predictable. However, aren’t most shows? The nice thing is that it’s predictable but still makes me laugh consistently. That being said, this next season (moving to a new network?!) should be its last. Keeping formerly funny shows alive simply because they are lucrative (Friends–yes, when it started, it actually was somewhat funny!–Seinfeld, the Simpsons, even South Park is getting stale!) kinda makes the show suck. The nice thing about Scrubs is that the characters actually never grow. They try, they seem to get it–Dr. Cox and Jordan seem to get nicer, the Janitor seems to get more sane, etc.–but then they fail miserably. It’s the plus of character development minus the downfalls of changing the character to the point where they no longer have the flaws that make them interesting. (Witness last season’s final J.D.-Barbie interaction.)
Good Lord, why did I ever type something that long? Okay–dead hookers, bukkake, the rule against perpetuities, res ipsa loquitur, implied warranty of habilitability, fruit of the poisonous tree . . . shit. Sorry, I devolved into legalese there. Still asinine and inane, but used by courts instead of Cracked readers.
Um. Swaim–funny article, but I agree with the peanut gallery. It makes me feel a bit sad for the guy. Then again, I’m not a millionaire. Dammit.
July 9th, 2008 at 11:44 pm
Not that I’m going to change the way I do anything to please you fuckers, but it’s weird to me how people assume I revile something because I pick on it a little. Brendan Fraser’s okay by me; seems nice. And his acting’s fine. He’s just never…taken off as far as I can tell. He seems stuck on a B-level due to typecasting that I just don’t see him shaking. Has little to do with his talent, more to do with the way Hollywood works.
Anyway, mocking something mercilessly is a form of love. Didn’t you guys have brothers?
July 9th, 2008 at 10:43 pm
No laugh track? I’ll definitely watch it.
July 9th, 2008 at 10:42 pm
Damn, Neil; that was deep. I’ll have to go pet my dog.
R_I, then I will get right on it. That’s a ringing endorsement if I’ve ever heard one. Isn’t it kind of odd for a girlfriend to get naked during comedies though? And wouldn’t she be bothered by all the dead hookers? Wait a minute…
Ha! You almost had me there, dude; you never said anything about her being alive. Your living room is probably like that opening scene in The Devil’s Rejects; you’ve got your little brother in a gimp mask dragging in fresh corpses for you to bed down with, and your sister’s Sherrie Moon Zombie. Lucky fucker.
July 9th, 2008 at 10:33 pm
I love scrubs, but it does follow a rather predictable pattern. hilarity followed by a melodramatic moment at the halfway point where they sum up how the three storylines are all facing the same problem. Then some more hilarity (usually a transition helped out by the janitor) and then a big melodramatic end when we found out that we all need to face our problems head on and grow up.
Although, the best and most important thing scrubs has accomplished is the death of the laugh track on nbc. The Office, My Name is Earl, and 30 Rock have all come after and succeeded with no laugh track. Thank you, scrubs, for this wonderful gift to mankind. Of course cbs is still shitting it up with the laugh track and abc is basically an all soap opera all the time channel plus Lost. So we still have a ways to go. But hey, that’s a big accomplishment from a show that no one really realized had succeeded until it was like “holy shit! it made it to six seasons!”
July 9th, 2008 at 10:23 pm
I liked blast from the past. it’s a decent cable watch.
But this article just depressed me. I think it was the interview more than anything. Because I kind of like Brendan Frasier and he seems so nice and friendly that I just want to like him more, but so many of his movies are just god awful. and he seems to know it and accept it. He’s so resigned to his fate, but in that interview it just seems like he’s trying to get into, he’s trying to believe he’s doing a great job, but deep down he knows its shitty.
It’s almost as if he’s a puppy whose been beaten by every master he’s ever had and then trying to get excited for his newest master, but is just to traumatized to fully get excited about it.
July 9th, 2008 at 10:13 pm
And it also manages pathos. Seriously, it can be hilarious at one moment and–this is bizarre–actually make you feel sad in another moment. (This has to do with Brendan Fraser.) A TV comedy that actually makes me feel emotions that I thought I had bludgeoned to death with a shovel–it’s halfway decent. ^_^
July 9th, 2008 at 10:12 pm
J-Pappi–I know it’s unbelievable. Trust me. There are about four shows for which I turn on the TV (The Daily Show and The Colbert Report are two of them), but Scrubs is actually amazingly funny. It’s like the network execs had an aneurysm and for a moment actually put a good TV show on the air, instead of the shit they usually do. And interestingly enough, my bizarre and incompatible friends who have myriad tastes all can agree that Scrubs is great. And my girlfriend watched it with me completely naked. So I may be a bit biased. ^_^
July 9th, 2008 at 10:06 pm
scrubs is easily the best show on television
July 9th, 2008 at 9:05 pm
Hmmmm….a network comedy that’s funny? This I have to see.
July 9th, 2008 at 8:06 pm
Scrubs is fucking awesome. Sure, there are some bum episodes, but most have me laughing out loud–which is truly amazing as I have neither a sense of humor nor a soul.
July 9th, 2008 at 8:03 pm
I haven’t watched scrubs, but what I’ve seen him in on the big screen was just pitiful. So a guy who can’t act IMO (or even worse won’t) and continues to pump out shitty movies that make him filthy, filthy rich I’m supposed to feel sorry for because he’s a nice guy? It DOES make a difference that he’s a nice, unassuming guy when you compare him to Tom Cruise who does the same thing on a slightly larger scale, but still. Anyone who can cry themselves to sleep on piles of gold bullion doesn’t need my sympathy.
July 9th, 2008 at 7:52 pm
Yes but I’m not, and that’s what’s important.
To me at least.
July 9th, 2008 at 7:42 pm
Swaim’s mocking him.
July 9th, 2008 at 7:30 pm
We’re not mocking him, we’re sorry for him. At least I am.
He tries, but dammit, he never gets anywhere.
July 9th, 2008 at 7:26 pm
When celebrities do the stereotypical celebrity crap like overestimate their talents, take themselves too seriously, bang supermodels, go clubbing, become tabloid fodder and make an ass of themselves everyone complains and ridicules them for acting like they’re above the normal people . When a celebrity does the exact opposite and stays low key, as brendan fraser has, you still mock and ridicule. What exactly do you want from these people?
July 9th, 2008 at 6:32 pm
Brendan Fraiser on scrubs is the best thing ever put on screen, so i think the whole best thing ever award makes him the best actor that ever lives
sorry for shooting down ur whole blog like that swaim, but i couldent let this injustsic skate
July 9th, 2008 at 6:11 pm
@ glendoor–aye. ^_^
July 9th, 2008 at 5:40 pm
I really like him, and I honestly wished he’d get another goddamn movie part. Just because it’s rare to have a nice actor.
But man, where’s the ambition? I understand in acting in order to get good parts you need to be able to sometimes physically elbow other actors out of the way.
July 9th, 2008 at 5:24 pm
Oh Yeah, I like Brendan Fraser too. I liked “Blast from the Past” and the first “Mummy” movie was a pretty good flick.
Picking on Brendan Fraser seems to me, Swaim, like kicking a lab puppy, though he does seem drunk or high in that interview.
July 9th, 2008 at 5:19 pm
@ass_master3000 How dare you correct me! You want to fight alright lets fight
BAMMM!!! OOOOWWWW DUDE, MY EYE YOU HIT ME IN THE EEEYYYEE!!!! THAT HUUURRT!!
I’M GOING TO TELL MY MOM ON YOU.
But before I go tell my mom on you let me tell you my direct experience with the Canadian
Army. The ones I dealt with are what they call fobbits now and when I was first in the Army they called them REMFs.
These are mostly logistical units that don’t ever leave their fobbit hole, so to speak and love to tell people how rough it is in Iraq while they sit on their ass in their air conditioned fobbit hole drinking beer and stealing shit.
The Canadian units I saw were lazy, disorganized, disrespectful and undisciplined, but in all honesty they were not any worse than any fobbit American units that I dealt with, but national prejudice made then seem so.
One last thing, the Canadian units that assaulted Juno beach did better than any other Allied unit on June the sixth. They faced fierce resistance and made it farther inland than anyone else that day.
July 9th, 2008 at 4:55 pm
This is the saddest funny article i’ve ever read.
July 9th, 2008 at 4:51 pm
Speaking of Canadians…
myspace.com/canadiancustoms
It’s some little rock and blues band I saw play at this bar. They’re really good.
July 9th, 2008 at 4:26 pm
I really love Brendan Fraser, and this post made me sad a little.
July 9th, 2008 at 3:51 pm
Not that I particularly care, but I would like to state that while the Canadian armed forces are exceptionally ill-equipped (I believe our entire Navy consists of a floating bathtub, 3 kayaks, some defective British subs and a pair of water-skis) - they’re actually supposedly highly skilled. In FACT, I often hear from some folks I know in the Casnadian Army that their overall training is more well-rounded and complete than that of our beloved American counterparts, who are more specialized (I believe this would be the point where glendoor, if reading, would challenge me to a fist fight?). Meh, hearsay I know, but it wouldn’t surprise me if it was true.
Also, we supposedly have the World’s best snipers, which, while not especially remarkable, is still kinda cool you gotta admit. Our sniper rifles of course come from the States though….
July 9th, 2008 at 3:39 pm
I’m telling you all, you cant act well because you don’t feel emotions without a soul. His soul was devoured by working with Pauly Shore. Therefore he is a victim. Also he is a caveman and mummy hunter.
July 9th, 2008 at 3:26 pm
Dude, he’s been in the same room with liz hurley.
July 9th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
Thank you, Swaim, for writing this. Every time I bring up to people that this guy can’t act his way out of a paper bag; they shake their heads at me in pity. Now I have tangible proof I’m not alone. He’s the modern day acting equivalent to Alan Hale (Skipper) from Gilligan’s Island. The guy literally had a hell of a lifelong career in Hollywood from just rolling his eyes when someone else did something stupid. Must be nice. I guess, though I suppose it would be hard to look in the mirror if you weren’t a retard.
July 9th, 2008 at 2:14 pm
I liked Monkeybone.
I would also like to point out that maybe the Casnadian Army and Air Force aren’t so tough, but our Navy is indestructible. We have an entire fleet of Casnadian Destroyers, like the HMCS PARANOIAAA!
July 9th, 2008 at 2:09 pm
Blast from the past was awesome! Also- I know that you are new to the LA area, but you should know two things: 1)If you are trying to come up with a city that is kind of loser-ish, don’t ever say Long Beach, try the valley, or maybe Bell Gardens 2)There is no Applebee’s in Long Beach
July 9th, 2008 at 1:51 pm
It probably would.
Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
Also, when I was a kid, I thought George of the Jungle and the one where he plays the mountie were fucking hilarious. I liked a lot of stupid shit when I was a kid. I even liked Batman Forever!
July 9th, 2008 at 1:43 pm
Man, Crash would not enjoy that anal violation very much.
<__> Or would it?
July 9th, 2008 at 1:40 pm
Hey, I liked George of the Jungle. Brendan spent the better part of the movie half naked and I don’t remember much of anything else! WOW! Hottie….
July 9th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
It’s true, Brednan Fraser was in Crash, but hey, you know what, fuck that movie.
Fuck that movie in the ass.
July 9th, 2008 at 1:04 pm
Fraiser is usually on my “i’ll watch it if he’s in it” list, simple because he’s good at what he does and doesn’t usually try to be something he’s not. I mean, I think he knows he’s never going to pull off Hamlet, so why bother trying?
The Mummy movies have always been my personal guilty pleasure … even tho I know they’re not great they have always kept me entertained. Much like most of the movies with The Rock in them.
I will never admit that tho … oh crap
July 9th, 2008 at 12:49 pm
Monkeybone was the last project from the James and the Giant Peach guy. Amazing visuals, not much else. Although again, Foley was good in it.
July 9th, 2008 at 12:44 pm
No one remembers Brendon Fraser in Crash!? He was the seriously-type DA for LA and stuff!
July 9th, 2008 at 12:39 pm
Blast from the Past was great, if not only for the legendary Christopher Walken. Anyway, does anyone remember Monkeybone?
July 9th, 2008 at 12:22 pm
I watched Blast from the Past! That was a decent movie, I think. Or maybe it just had all of the things that decent movies have, but because Brendan Frasier was in it, it’ll forever just be some crummy Brenda Frasier vehicle.
Foley was good in it.
July 9th, 2008 at 11:57 am
No one’s mentioned Blast From The Past. I thought he was good in that. Oh, wait. Am I the only one who’s seen it?
July 9th, 2008 at 11:43 am
He got to work with The Kids in the Hall in “Brain Candy”, so that’s major points in my book, regardless of anything else. Also, I think Brendan has acted with more non-objects than any actor alive. He has done tons of movies where he has to act with/play off of things that aren’t there. The Mummy films, George of the Jungle, Looney Tunes: Back In Action, Journey to the Center of the Earth. It’s ridiculous.
July 9th, 2008 at 11:34 am
I like Brendan Fraser. He was good in those couple of episodes of Scrubs, and the Mummy movies are enjoyable fluff. It would be nice to see him get some work. Unless he doesn’t want it. Whatever.
July 9th, 2008 at 11:19 am
Brenden Fraiser was funny in Airheads but then again so was Adam Sandler so that doesnt really count…
He is a pretty godd actor but he isnt talented or good looking enough to make the jump to real movies that people remember.
July 9th, 2008 at 11:13 am
It’s a little known fact that as the Canadians were storming Juno Beach at Normandy, the Nazis were too busy laughing to fight back. ^_^ Also, there were Mounties.
July 9th, 2008 at 11:11 am
The biggest tragedy of it all is that he had to work with Pauly Shore. That would just eat your soul. Not even Pauly Shore wants to work with Pauly Shore.
July 9th, 2008 at 11:08 am
“Army guys (but not scary ones…Canadian ones). “HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! God if you only knew how true that statement was and how bad I wanted to say that on Canada Day.
July 9th, 2008 at 11:03 am
I feel bad laughing at this because it seems so realistic that Brendan Fraser is a sad, nice man trapped in his family action movies and he’s kind of OK with it.
July 9th, 2008 at 10:54 am
I actually still kind of like him. I imagine him as a tragically nice guy, who just does what the studios tell him and then walks around being a nice guy the rest of the time.
July 9th, 2008 at 10:46 am
Damn. I always kind of liked him. But that interview. Why must you destroy everything that is good Swaim?