Premature Ejaculation Daredevil: Why Super Senses Would Suck
Daredevil got his start as a superhero the way many children do: He was hit by a radioactive truck. It replaced his eyesight with radar and gave him the ability to smell, hear and feel harder than any man alive. These things all helped him grow up to become a ninja and start a law firm. He's a complicated character, perfect for readers looking for more maturity in their graphic literature. And since I've always considered myself to be a writer of graphic maturity, I thought I'd see what I could bring to the Daredevil universe. I give you... Premature Ejaculation Daredevil.
Okay, totally not fair. I'm stuck at home (third day) with a godawful flu that struck down my entire office, hacking up my lungs and trying not to throw up, and DareDevil vs. Stilt Man just about killed me.
ReplyDo you know how hard it is to laugh without ejecting a lung onto my keyboard, here??
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ReplyUh, critters that do have "Super-senses" aren't overwhelmed by them.
ReplyLike my CAT who can ignore it like it's nothing when I play loud music -BUT- still during that have her ears twitch and she hears a tiny insect scuttling across the floor and kills it...
tl;dr
ReplySeanbaby, you truly are the funniest man on Cracked.
ReplyI must tick 'yes' every time.
ReplyOnly article I've ever read more than once. Really good.
Reply"Approachers! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!"
ReplyI thought I was going to die laughing.
Of all the juvinile, mindless, one note jokes you have ever used, SeanBaby, this is the worst offender of all.
ReplyI almost threw up from laughing so hard.
Never gets old.
ReplyI rofled so much
ReplyI just happened to be reading this while listening to Jizz in my Pants by The Lonely Island. lol
ReplyThis was amazing.
ReplySometimes the phobia of Premature Ejaculation causes it.So its better to be your own without thinking too much on performance.
ReplyRead up on the issue, haven't you?
OMFG "With my enhanced senses, I can hear two cops down there arguing whether or not there's a police code for a man in tights smashing his dick against a robot." made me lmfao!
ReplyGod, I love Popsicle Pete. :D
ReplyRLLY RLLY FUNNY i was laughion my ass off i even waked my parents and they told me to STFU LOL
Replywhats everyones problem?
Replyi thought it was really funny.
do more!
I didn't find this very funny, but maybe that's because I don't laugh at dick jokes.
Reply Hide All See All 6 RepliesThese are jokes which dont bring any laughs.
Umberphoenix and tanay2035....... I hate both of you so much right now.
Why would you be on cracked then?
Well, you're in luck, I'm sure there's an episode of Two and a Half Men on right now. Seriously? No love for "slip alley"?
Does that make you better then us who do?
Gonzomaggot - You said pretty much what I was going to say. People who don't find these funny is the result of them not being smart enough to get the humor. They're probably watching old larry the cable guy videos as we speak. Slip alley was the best line in here!
I dunno... I generally LOVE all the stuff on cracked, but I really didn't get this one. I mean I get the thing about super-senses leading to super-premature-ejaculation [which would be kinda cool under certain very very strict circ*mstances], but other than that, I don't get it.
ReplyWhy do people block out random letters in words?
That word ejaculated so they censored it.