Every once in a while, I have to explain a situation in a full sentence, because one word to represent that situation doesn't exist. And I hate doing that, because I am a whirling, spinning, terrifying, motherfucking HURRICANE of efficiency.
What if I told you that in your lifetime, you've seen some of the best guitarists to ever live pass right by, virtually unnoticed because you were too busy making fun of their wussy bands?
The Umbrella Corporation is the most stupidly evil corporation in history.
When I got into foreign action movies as a kid in the '90s, subtitling was a job we gave to alcoholic head trauma victims to make them feel useful to society again. Those jobs, like many, have since moved online.
There's a good chance this will end with me throwing up on the carpet. So let's get started!
It's not just Prince Harry or Michael Phelps. I've even seen this in person with my friends, on evenings when we've gathered for one of our regular naked drug roundtables.
I write screenplays that feature none of this crap, so it can be done! Please buy my screenplay. Or just don't make these movies. Whatevs.
While the headlines are dominated by our weekly mass shootings, the reality is that day to day, we common folk make little sacrifices for each other and let insults slide and feel bad when we act like douchebags.
Experienced travelers all agree that one of the hardest and least rewarding of these cultural obstacles is the experience of arriving in a new town and discovering that everyone there is going to try and murder you.