Not A Video of Teen Girls Beating Their Schoolmate Senseless: The Daily 4PMer (EST)!
TEEN GIRL GETS BEATEN BY 8 OTHER TEENS
I was all set to bring you guys yet another hilarious web video fished from the bowels of Youtube today (as I have for months in this recurring segment we lovingly call "the 4PMer"), when they went and took the damn thing down.
See, I was wading through the usual retinue of 80s toy commercials, ugly people performing magic to a hi-8 camera, and chimps shitting on themselves, when I stumbled upon this flat-out hilarious video of six teen girls beating the living crap out of a schoolmate while she sobs and begs not to be hit anymore. LOLZ!
They ended up hospitalizing her and damaging her sight and hearing; THATS how funny it was. And even better, it went on for half an hour! Thats like a full episode of Cheers!
Alas, all I can find now is this lame news report about the attackers being put in jail. I guess its still kind of funnyI mean youve got the mother of one of the attackers blaming the beaten girl, the two boyfriends who proved their manliness by serving as lookouts, and of course it still retains some of the innate fun of the initial beating.
So while I couldnt find the full video, I hope youll agree that I, Ross Wolinsky, have still done my best to bring you the funniest Youtube content available. Tomorrow: a video of eight babies laughing!
Sincerely,
Ross Wolinsky.
When not blogging for Cracked, Ross Wolinsky wishes he were head writer and co-founder of Those Aren't Muskets!
I peed myself laughing.
ReplyI do not miss the ignorance of the usa. As for standing up for herself and if she had it coming is not even a point. From what you heard she had it coming. That is so stupid. Must be american thinking. From what I saw she was doing nothing. I did not have audio on and did not want to watch it all since I have better things to do. Who told these people she had it coming. The usa news, the girls beating her, the girls boyfriends that watched the beating. Hum. Oh well how american. It was said so it sure must be true to the sleeping sheep in the usa. Millions of people die from inbreeding ignorance.
ReplyHad the girl stood up for herself and fought back it could have ended up in a stabbing or shooting of her. Either way how american for the people on the net to put that out on main pages. That tells others to go aheaded and do such things to be online. WTF is wrong with the world out there. Retards! they are hick inbreeding asses nothing more to it!
You did not watch it all because you had better things to do, yet you managed to find time to managed to post the longest comment yet...
If you're going to be condescending, at least be consistent.
I think that it is a very interesting and amusing article. Practically all its main points are true.
ReplyI noticed that this is not the first time at all that you mention the topic. Why have you decided to write about it again?
ReplyI'll tell you my take on the economy: fuck you!
ReplyYou want a seminar? How's this: fuck you!
Didn't see that one coming, did you?
Where are the parents?? This is a shame but usually if you look at the "trashy" girls parents they are probably uneducated, red neck pieces of trash themselves......So it's no wonder their children would behave in such a ignorant manner. I think if the parents were put in jail also or atleast have to pay hefty penalties when their children decide to act like animals maybe this world would change.
ReplyIf you were a parent who believed that beating your children would solve their problems, you would very likely be the type to teach them that violence is acceptable as an answer to interpersonal problems.
ReplyZING!!
See, the problem with life in general is that the good is mixed with the bad in such a way that anything RELATING to something bad is automatically also bad.
For instance, I believe in punishing one's child by spanking him.
I do not believe, however, in slapping your child in the face or beating the ever-living out of him unless he does something like stab someone; however, if he does that, then you've probably already raised him poorly to begin with.
So my philosophy of "spare the rod, spoil the child," is lumped in with, "get drunk and beat your child senseless with your fists".
That is the very definition of why I hate people/the world at large.
Note: I am not directly attacking you, just the ideas which I have presented in my statement.
This is sick. I don;t care if the girl "had it coming" or not. The chicken shit girls who ganged up in her need their asses kicked. They were too sissy to confront the poor girl one on one. Did you see the picyurs of the 18 year old? She butt ugly - THATs they they ganged up i her..they were jealous. I wish I had 10 minutes alone with each of this stupid girls. Someone needs to beat the hell out of each of them. If that were my child - - you can bet I'd be in jail right now for kicking the crap out of the little assholes.
ReplyClearly the teens in question were raised by Hannah Montana.
ReplyHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!
ReplyPerhaps cal can do his proofreading/editing.
ReplyI'd like to know fuck you's take on the economy. And globalization. Perhaps a seminar is in order.
Replywow u r a sad perzon u need some serious help whoeva u are u are a sick sick person
ReplyI think fuck you makes an interesting point, but I wish he'd elaborate a bit.
ReplyFuck you
Reply>>How come the beaters get classy pixellated faces while the beat-ee just gets a chintzy white dot over her face? Who decides this stuff?
ReplyThe original censor only censored the victim. The names and faces of the perps have been released to the public. I don't know why someone felt the need to suddenly add censoring to them...
Haaaa....while Vicki may be spam, that was actually an excellent comment.
ReplyI do not like her. Many girls at the free and hot celeb and millionaire dating club 'RichMatchMaki ng.c om......',are much hotter and more beatiful than her..
ReplyHow come the beaters get classy pixellated faces while the beat-ee just gets a chintzy white dot over her face? Who decides this stuff?
ReplyAh, we had clips of girls beating each other (bum beating his wife, etc) too, but because we're so advanced here in EU, they weren't longer than 10 minutes. I sure hope the clip is somewhere in the internets.
Reply