Editor’s Note: Word Puncher is the first new column since we launched this section of the site, but its author should be familiar to you by now. Robert Brockway has been punching words into Cracked feature articles since last October, when he faced down a surly gang of over 3,000 words about 80s rock, and left them in a bloodied heap of groans called The 10 Most Terrifyingly Inspirational '80s Songs. Since then he has beat the sass out of words on topics from creepy robots to martial artists who make him sad. Check back tomorrow for his first post as a Cracked Columnist. It's about all the creative ways science is working to make you better at getting drunk, and it just might make your mind crap its brain pan.