In 2012, I covered the most amazing celebrity meltdown no one was talking about. Comedian Katt Williams had spent a few months going absolutely bonkers: allegedly punching his female assistant hard enough to send her to the hospital, threatening to sue Seattle for $50 million for hurting his reputation "as a father and a black man," and trying to flee from a Target on a motorized shopping cart after slapping an employee and stealing some french fries. Those are just three on a much longer list of incidents (he was arrested 14 times in 46 months), any one of which would have been enough to label him as someone who genuinely needs some professional help.
That and the hair.
Well, it's four years later, and like other crazy but apparently necessary quadrennial events like Leap Year and the World Cup, Williams is back to his old ways.
4He's Apparently Still Cool With Attacking Women
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While everyone is innocent until proven guilty, if you can say one thing about Katt Williams it is that people seem to want to hit him all the time. At least that is his go-to explanation for why he attacks people: It is almost always self-defense. But sometimes it doesn't even take physical action to set him off.
On Feb. 28, five women went to the cops claiming that Williams and 15 members of his entourage attacked them, pulled a gun, and took their cellphones. When the police showed up, he said that he had only brandished the firearm because he heard one of the women say the word "gun." So, in the future, everyone make sure not to say "biological weapon" or "nuclear bomb" around him, because he doesn't seem to understand how weapons work.
But that is nothing compared with the allegations from actress Jamila Majesty, who claims Williams and "four or five scantily clad female companions" held her hostage and beat her for hours (while baking cookies.)
The picture of her battered face is pretty intense, so here's what the cookies probably looked like.
Her crime? Using his bathroom without his permission. And when Katt Williams is the one torturing you, you can be sure it will be next-level crazy. According to an interview Majesty gave to Page Six, Williams burned her with cigarettes, talked about God, smoked weed, and repeatedly screamed, "Are you a Michael Jackson fan?" all while beating her. The women even applied ice to her wounds so they could hit her more after she felt a little better. After a few hours he let her leave, she says, as long as she promised she wouldn't go to the police. Shockingly, she didn't keep that promise.
3He Likes Sucker-Punching Kids, Too
Just a few days ago Williams was outside Atlanta hanging out with some children, and everything seemed to be going well, if a bit weird. That is when you should be worried, because with this guy it is definitely the calm before the shitstorm.
Williams showed up at a housing project unannounced and started handing out money. If someone is giving you free cash, you are less inclined to ask why, because you want the money, but in general sane people don't tend to do that. Then Williams joined a bunch of preteen kids for a game of pickup soccer. Again, not exactly a normal thing to do for a 41-year-old man, but if it was David Beckham doing it we would think it was adorable. And then Williams sucker-punched a 17-year-old kid in the head.
Of course someone got the whole thing on video, and regardless of the fact that it's blurry and choppy and we live in a post-HD world, within minutes it was racking up hits on YouTube.
This would normally be where I talk about how horrible that was, and I'm not saying it was a great thing, but what makes it crazy rather than terrible is the fact that Williams is 5-foot-5, very slim, and the kid he attacked, Luke Wash, is a former wrestler. So within seconds Wash had him on the ground in a rear naked choke, which could not have been funnier if they actually had been naked. Then Williams tapped out, literally, and the crowd pulled them apart. But despite just having had his ass handed to him by a teenager, Williams continued to taunt Wash, as if the only reason he wasn't kicking his butt was the people holding him back.