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Hayden Bezaubernd Spart die Japanischen Delfine

  • By: Ian Cooper
  • November 2nd, 2007
  • 657 views

Hayden Panettiere, the bite-sized star of the TV show “Heroes” (as lovingly chronicled on this blog), has developed a wide following among teenage girls and the pasty middle-aged men who love them. But what her fans may not know is that she’s also a daring eco-warrior who travels the globe protecting adorable species from harm, although not always successfully, as demonstrated in this video (presented here in German, for comedic effect):

For those of you slackers who don’t spreken zie Deutsch, here’s the scoop:

“It was really frightening,” Panettiere said. “Some of us were hit by the [fisherman's] boat hook. But in the end, all we really worried about was the dolphins.” Growing emotional, the actress said they were close enough to the dolphins to see them “sky-hopping, jumping out of the water to see us… One little baby dolphin stuck his head out and kind of looked at me, and the thought that it’s no longer with us is really difficult to take,” she said, tears streaking down her face.

Yes, that’s very sad. Next time please wear a bikini.

However, since Ms. Panettiere in a wetsuit saving dolphins went over so well, I’d like to offer my suggestions for further sexy celebrity activism, such as:

  • A lingerie-clad Jessica Alba chains herself to an endangered tree, like the one in my backyard
  • Scarlett Johansson boycotts clothes for 2008 to protest sweatshops or whatever
  • Kim Kardashian refuses to sleep with any more rappers until Paris Hilton is released from jail
  • Michelle Obama challenges Obama Girl to a Jello-wrestling match to raise money for her husband’s campaign
  • Britney Spears goes on a hunger strike to protest her own horrible Halloween costume
  • Ben Affleck lays down in front of a bulldozer in a rainforest, preferably one driven by a deaf and blind person


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This entry was posted on Friday, November 2nd, 2007 at 4:00 pm and is filed under Animals, Hayden Panettiere, Heroes, Japan. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

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3 Responses to “Hayden Bezaubernd Spart die Japanischen Delfine”

  1. Lundstrom Says:

    Ha!

    You would think that they world have OK’d it at the beginning instead of allowing it to go so long without saying a thing and then bringing it back up when it was too late. I don’t understand it at all. Quit Smoking In 7 Days

  2. Ian Cooper Says:

    If anything, it is the logging companies that need to be protected from the bears. And I speak as the owner of a house built entirely of bears.

  3. Ross Says:

    Oh great, have all the actresses suddenly become 12 year old Valley girls?

    Next it’ll be ‘oh my God the poor fluffy little bears, let’s go hug them and protect them from logging companies!’

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