Giving The Weirdos Their Due: The Daily Nooner (EST)!
Dear People With Very Specific Skills Who Put Repetitive Videos Of Themselves Showing Off Those Skills YouTube,
First off, I'd just like to congratulate you all: You've created a new artform for the internet era, and for that you should be proud. I'm not going to deny that your videos are amazing, but I can't help but wonder: What did you guys do before YouTube? Did you backflip into your pants whenever more than a handful of people were in the room? Was it hard to do it live because you didn't have the luxury of editing out all the failed attempts? Did your friends & family get sick of you always trying to backflip into your pants at parties, or did they accept it as part of what made you a beautiful & unique snowflake?
Either way, you guys must be loving this whole YouTube thing, huh? You know - what with all the millions of people out there who haven't seen you showing off your very specific skills. The view counts keep rising, the comments keep rolling in, and you're left sitting there, watching it all happen and thinking to yourself, "Gosh! These people love me! They really love me!" I'll be honest with you, people with very specific skills who put repetitive videos of themselves showing off those skills on YouTube: I'm not entirely sure why we, the YouTube viewing public, eat shit like this up with such a voracious appetite. Yes, your videos are impressive, and no, I don't think I could backflip into a pair of jeans if I wanted to, but does that really explain why these videos end up being viewed by millions of people? Are we all just jealous of your unbelievably specific skills? I don't think that completely explains it.
So why then? Why do the guys throwing bottles and sunglasses and jumping into pants get all the internet fame while more deserving characters (like the naked Japanese guy cooking mushrooms) fall by the wayside? I'm going to take a guess: It's because people are more likely to forward a video of some guys throwing sunglasses onto each others' faces than a video of a naked Japanese guy in a horse mask cooking mushrooms. People feel comfortable sending their parents and coworkers a video of some guys doing backflips into Levi's, but a naked Japanese guy cooking mushrooms? Ehh... not so much.
So I have a challenge for you all today (and now I'm talking to all Cracked readers, not just the people with very specific skills who put repetitive videos of themselves showing off those skills on YouTube): I want you all to email the naked Japanese mushroom chef to a parent, relative, or coworker today with a message that says "Thought you would enjoy this LOL!" Let's give the weirdos their due today.
Awesome write-up, really! I really love this time of the year! Snowman and Cookie - Yah!
Replyamazing post ! I will bookmark your blog . thanks
ReplyI don't would be wise to attempt that in jeans with a zip. Fortunately those hip, trendy cats were wearing LEVIS ZIPPERLESS JEANS with MOTHERFUCKING BUTTONS. they could just flip in, button that shit up and they were set to go chillax with their homeskillets in their LEVIS ZIPPERLESS MOTHERFUCKING JEANS.
ReplyIn other news, LEVIS! LEVIS! LEVIS!
These people are all fucking retarded.
ReplyEach and every one of these "skills" loses it's impact after 3 or 4 times.
Thus, I award them all Honorable Mention winners in the Douchebag Olympics.
I want to see a video of some dude just dropping bottles into trash receptacles in a totally unremarkable way, with some slick techno beats in the background.
Reply...and now I've totally ruined the joke for anyone who wanted to make that video.
nope just psycadelic (halucinogenic) geez I cant spell
ReplyNow I know why all the kids wear pants with a waist size so large they hang off their asses and halfway down to their knees. Mystery solved.
ReplyI looked into the Japanese Mushroom guy video. There are others related to it. Although I can't be positive, I thought the mushrooms were supposed to be poisonous or cooked with cyanide or something.
Well, if the free-runners and martial artists on youtube post their videos to attract attention and get stuntman gigs, maybe the pants-jumpers are attempting to build notoriety before they approach Arizona or Levis to appear in a series of commercials.
ReplyOr they're just expressing their disdain for inefficient pants-donning methodology.
I've got to admit, that first thing is actually pretty useful for when you accidentally get sprung on a childrens swing-set without pants. A situation I have found myself in on far too many occasions.
ReplyI just wish the pants guys had of collaborated with the japanese guy in the horse mask cooking the mushrooms. That would have at least made that video a little more pleasant / less horrifying for everyone watching.
What are you taking about I cook mushrooms naked while wearing a horse mask all the time, sometimes I wear a batman mask if it's a special occasion.
ReplyYou may be right, glendoor42... or it may be leprechaun magic!
ReplyAlthough the guy has the best 'smug-bastard' face when he does his trick.
The sunglasses stuff is done by a reverse camera trick and fishing line.
ReplyAnd that sunglasses guy - for every time he got it perfect, how many times would he have poked himself in the eye? It is truly amazing that he hasn't poked himself blind yet...
ReplyI would send that video to my family and friends...but I want to KEEP my family in friends...
ReplyTheoretically, the bottle throwing thing is at least time-saving. I added up all the shots in those videos and those kids EASILY saved themselves a good minute and twenty seconds. Don't act like that's not worth it.
ReplyI figure it has to hurt where no man wants to be hurt when you backflip or jump into a pair of pants like that. I mean, wouldn't it?????
ReplyFrankly, I'd be a little more impressed seeing someone back flip out of a pair of pants than into one... and lol hisownspace
ReplyWow, JesusChris, BEFORE he recommended it? You're like one of those guys who liked Nirvana before they were popular.
ReplyI wish those pant's dudes would have shown all the times they busted their ass trying that.
ReplyI cant forward that, those mushrooms were mildly psycadelic. everyone would think I'm into crazy drugs.
Replythat does probably explain alot about that vid tho.