So I’ve kind of noticed something. The less I like my HBN, the more time I put into the accompanying blog post. So in that tradition, let me say this is my favorite HBN ever. You disagree? That’s fine, go become Facebook friends with Ross and let him know about it. I on the other hand am pleased. And it has boobs. So c’mon don’t be greedy.
In this space typically reserved for merriment, I’d like to give a shout out to Sam Durfee/Robot Jesus and Starberry. Why? Why not, I already said I wasn’t going to be funny here. Besides they were two of the earliest HBN supporters. Their illegal and barely legal love got me through some dark times in a way that Swaim’s deep tissue massages just couldn’t. Thanks.
Check out some more of Gladstone’s stuff HERE. And while you may already be his Facebook friend, have you joined the club that all the kids are talking about?
Last 5 posts by HBN
- CNN Thinks Gift Cards Are Complicated (or Contest Winners, Rankings and preparing for the end) - November 17th, 2008
- Twilight Looks Like Crap (or Announcing the Hate By Numbers Contest) - November 10th, 2008
- Japanese Cat Saves Local Economy (Or What Would Hate By Numbers Look Like Without Hate) - November 3rd, 2008
- Marcia Brady Has More Problems Than You'd Imagine (If you imagine that fictional characters are real) - October 27th, 2008
- What if WalMart Made a Movie (or Jack O'Brien works for a living) - October 20th, 2008
October 5th, 2008 at 12:36 pm
decent
October 5th, 2008 at 1:40 am
These HBN shorts are getting progressively better. I actually laughed at this one.
October 3rd, 2008 at 2:16 pm
No Comment needed… you KNOW what im thinking…
In case you dont, it involves Gladstone, A shaved goat and whipped cream…
Oh, thats right, restraining order, i forgot.
At least DOB will still fuck me if i bring 2 bottles of peach schnapps and a fist shaped dildo.
October 2nd, 2008 at 8:06 pm
Nipnotized!
October 2nd, 2008 at 3:22 pm
Who knew there were so many ‘monkeys’ out there? Ms. Moss obviously has issues..most likely due to her consumption of wheat germ and soy-based foods. Perhaps her recycling bin in her backyard is emitting noxious and mind-altering fumes resulting in the misfiring of neurons in her brain. Or, she is just an exhibitionist freak sadly due to her parents’ nudist/streaking behavior. Maybe she’s smoking the wheat germ..
As for where to ride nude geographically, I’m with kingmonkey in the locale should be warm. We’re all half naked here daily anyway, (Oahu), and while her behavior would stand out, it wouldn’t be newsworthy. Unless she was riding with say, a turtle strapped to her tush..
October 2nd, 2008 at 3:13 pm
Gladstone knows what you want, baby. Gladstone knows what you need.
October 2nd, 2008 at 2:26 pm
i almost fell out of my chair when you put on aquarius,
and its a rolling chair
on tile
that would have hurt…
lol- nice one gladstone
October 2nd, 2008 at 11:55 am
Riding a bike naked in Ontario would have to be a seasonal thing. Even now it’s getting a bit cold. Everyone nearby would be hypnotized by the nipples.
Nipnotized!
October 2nd, 2008 at 9:14 am
She should come to my hometown. Woman here are allowed to go topless. (Unless they changed the by-law recently…only one way to find out for sure) As for totally naked, well that’s where the strip clubs come in. Viva Ontario! Canada.
I think riding a bike naked would be a tad uncomfortable and possibly messy, depending on exactly how much love one is feeling for mother earth at that time.
October 1st, 2008 at 10:50 pm
So it was Gladstone we had sandwiched? Niiiiiiiiiiice
October 1st, 2008 at 8:33 pm
Leathermonkey42? I hereby claim this as a shout out to both myself and glendoor42!
October 1st, 2008 at 3:14 am
Does anyone else have problems with the video player? I’ve still only watched half of it..
Good half Gladstone 
Well maybe this is the key to making a one day a week episode last a whole week?
September 30th, 2008 at 8:54 pm
I think this is the best HBN so far and not only because of my shout out. It had everything. cynicism, smugness, boobs and the world famous Gladstone strip tease! I actually have a few classmates who are hardcore enviormentalist enough to do something that ridiculous…
September 30th, 2008 at 7:40 pm
..well, maybe if you were LeatherMonkey42..
September 30th, 2008 at 6:30 pm
wow! small world! We should hook up! Not in a gay way or anything… unless you want to.
September 30th, 2008 at 3:04 pm
I feel like Clint Allen.
September 30th, 2008 at 2:53 pm
How all of a sudden do I not have humor? Frick. I got plenny. Ian Cooper, eh? Alrighty, then. For the record I feel robbed. I want the real thing. Regardless. I try and not make G-Stone feel like a piece of meat (cousin references) and I’m a hapless, witless bitch? Thanks GG..now I have to search again for Vanity/Miley/G-Stone. (Insert LOL! ROFL!) Does that give you solace, some guy, that I’m joyful in this pursuit?
I can’t win..
September 30th, 2008 at 12:17 pm
If anyone cares, my favorite pic of Gladstone is not the photoshopped Jesus chest hair one. It’s the Vanity Fair/Miley Cyrus/Gladstone one.
I wish I had Photoshop.
September 30th, 2008 at 10:24 am
You didn’t need to respond to that, G-stone.
josie obviously has no sense of humour.
September 30th, 2008 at 10:00 am
uh, yeah, for the record both max von sydow and the old jesus hbn are photoshopped by the great ian cooper.
September 30th, 2008 at 9:10 am
Photoshopped..
September 30th, 2008 at 8:54 am
Aloha..geez..Gladstone, you have a memory. I suppose I would too.
The kids today were pointing out where you’ve been seen without a shirt. I’m pretty sure I’ve seen it all, until I went to the new fangled, Wayne Gladstone website. (pay me $50 for the referral)..
Yes..you, without a shirt.. (.but even better was the one time with you in a tee. I’m probably you’re only fan who doesn’t desire you -that way-you remind me of my cousin) ..but you were so completely cute then (9 months ago?) Adorable..a great HBN this week..Your acting skills are improving..
September 30th, 2008 at 7:34 am
What happens if you are just to desirable whilst naked?
Does that count of provocative intent?
Gladstone I expected more nudity from you…. It’s okay to show off your body these days, I read recently that the more hair you have on your body is directly linked to your manliness…
If that is the case I’m expecting you are one hell of a manly man sir
September 30th, 2008 at 6:12 am
Agreed Wallsy, and, apparently, in Portland it’s not even illegal if the naked person does not intend to be provocative. I don’t get that. How does an officer gauge that subjective intent?
BTW, I’m glad you like HBN now. You harshed on the first version of it when it was a segment on Week in Douchebaggery, but that was fair enough. That segment didn’t work. Too compressed a time frame to do it right.
September 30th, 2008 at 5:52 am
Great HBN and all, but I have one question: Who the hell calls 911 because they see a naked person? How is that an emergency of any kind? You might not approve, you might think it’s a stupid idea (imagine if you fell off a bike naked. That would be unpleasant), and yes, it is illegal. But it does not qualify as an emergency.
September 30th, 2008 at 5:16 am
zomg. lulz.
September 30th, 2008 at 3:25 am
Meh
September 29th, 2008 at 5:45 pm
To see ‘im shirtless, just look up the previous HBN that talks about which news channel had the most ludicrus human interest story about Jesus. And FYI, that chest hair is shaped like Jesus (see HBN mentioned above). Clearly that’s a sign that the Lord approves of Gladstone, HBN, and chest hair. YAY, CHEST HAIR!
September 29th, 2008 at 5:45 pm
Next HBN: Gladstone gets waxed, tapes the experience, and then hates on it. Millions of female fans faint from watching it.
September 29th, 2008 at 4:43 pm
Anyone else actually catch sight of the rug for a few seconds under the robe? Seriously G-Stone since you’re talking about hippies this week how many could set up a logging protest on your chest?
HYOOO
September 29th, 2008 at 4:40 pm
Shirtless Gladstone = Bearskin rug.
September 29th, 2008 at 4:15 pm
Hemp-fiber robe!? That thing must have been itchy … and I bet it smelled like patchouli.
September 29th, 2008 at 3:03 pm
And you sir, have mistaken HBN for comedy.
September 29th, 2008 at 3:03 pm
Ever since our workplace computers had streaming blocked, I’ve raced through afternoon traffic like a fiend every monday to catch HBN on my lunch break. I even feely douchely tempted to get an iPhone or some shit for the entirely unforgivable gratification of watching Gladstone while stuck in traffic, but nah.
And I just caught 40 Year Old Virgin on the telly last night, so that’s the second time The Age of Aquarius wraps up my laughs in less than a day.
Thank you! Best HBN since Little Ms. Moonrocks or whatserface.
September 29th, 2008 at 3:02 pm
Oh man, for a second I thought that you where going to take the robe off and actually meet the demand for shirtless blogging.
September 29th, 2008 at 2:26 pm
I got all flushed and excited when I realized what was about to happen. Shirtless Gladstone.
I’ve waited so long.
Then it ended so abruptly, with just a hint of swarthy chest hair and no disrobing. It was a cruel, dirty trick.
Best HBN ever.
September 29th, 2008 at 2:21 pm
What’s your problem, you hate boobs?
Boobies!!!! YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!
September 29th, 2008 at 2:16 pm
If being an environmentalist means you are against the wearing of clothes, then I am an environmentalist.
September 29th, 2008 at 2:00 pm
you’re right. Everyone should start talking like that. right now. GO!
September 29th, 2008 at 1:01 pm
Why just Gladstone? Most grave situations could be dealt with in that voice.
Imagine, a cop comes to your door. “I’m sorry maaaam, your partner was inciiiiinerated in a fiiiire at their office plaaaaaace.”
You’d be all, what partner? It would say to you, “i’m sorry for your loss, but I’m here for you baby.” Oh yeah.
September 29th, 2008 at 12:53 pm
love love love the sexy voice during the mother earth edition. Can’t you please talk like that all the time Gladstone?
September 29th, 2008 at 12:17 pm
I very much enjoyed the shout out and I cannot watch the video yet sadly since I am at school and our computers are without sound…
September 29th, 2008 at 11:19 am
Hair is exactly what you would see if Gladstone took off that robe. Zing!
What is champagne comedy, anyways? Does it come with caviar laughs?
September 29th, 2008 at 9:40 am
Hey Gladstone, do you know that your British equivalent, Charlie Brooker recently made a zombie TV show based on Big Brother that’s going to be aired on British TV this Friday? You chould really check it out.
And if you don’t know who Charlie Brooker is, then check out his shows “Charlie Brooker’s Screenwipe” & “Nathan Barley” on YouTube.
September 29th, 2008 at 9:21 am
What happened to the much promised and highly anticipated Gladstone related nudity?
September 29th, 2008 at 8:25 am
With all due respect Gladstone, I have to disagree with your title…boobs are always news. At least, to me they are. Congratulations on another spectacular HBN.
September 29th, 2008 at 8:24 am
Oh dear god I looked her up, she’s one of those hemp nuts.
http://deathby1000papercuts.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/06/jennifer_moss.jpg
September 29th, 2008 at 8:12 am
You had me at ‘boobs’.
September 29th, 2008 at 8:11 am
great stuff gladstone, that had me bemused throught.
September 29th, 2008 at 7:56 am
‘why hello’ - You do that so well.
Your face after the mother earth edition HBN is classique.
champagne comedy gladstone.
September 29th, 2008 at 7:45 am
“with one hand” jokes never get old. Ever!
That song totally made me want to go and watch Hair…
Your facial expressions never fail to crack me up G-Stone. Luuurrve the robe.
September 29th, 2008 at 7:21 am
Amazing.
Simply breathtaking.