Hi Bucholz-fans. I got shanghaied into writing a feature article this week, so there's not going to be a column today. This is something like the first Tuesday in a year and a half I've missed an update, and I'm getting all choked up just thinking about it. The feature piece should be up later this week. I asked for it to be up today to maintain my sacred Tuesday-related vow to my fans, but Jack said he couldn't do it, because he hates you. As a comedic placeholder until next week, please enjoy this picture I just made of the Hamburglar rocking an enormous hamburger.