Boondock Saints 2: Bad Idea or Terrible Idea?
Well folks, it looks like Boondock Saints 2, (or "Twondock Saints," as it is called by no one), is seriously on the road to production. The idea has been brought up before, (2002, 2006), but writer/director Troy Duffy seems to think it's for real this time. For those not in the know, Boondock Saints snuck out about nine years ago to a depressing box office but developed a huge cult following on DVD. The story, about a pair of Irish brothers, (white kind of brother), taking the law into their own hands and ridding the streets of injustice, apparently struck a chord with the movie-watching public.
Not many people know this, but before I was a Cracked Blogger, I was a machete-wielding street vigilante in Rhode Island. True story. Gladstone and I both, actually, spent three years (on and off) cleaning up the wicked streets of "the Ocean State." If it hadn't been for my street-vigilante-based ties with Gladstone, in fact, I probably never would have even gotten this job here at Cracked.
We'd go around with our weapons, Gladstone with his mace and me with my machete. The press nicknamed us "M&M," which, admittedly, was slightly more clever than what I wanted to call us, ["Murder: With a Capital GoFuckYourself"]. We made a few headlines and took down some of Rhode Island's most notorious drug lords and mobsters. Ever hear of the Chechnyan Mafia in Providence? Of course you haven't. Mace and I took care of them years ago.
You're welcome.
Anyway, due to my propensity for taking various things into my own hands, (the law, for one. Machetes for another), Boondock Saints really resonated with me. A couple of guys running around serving up hot, steaming justice to local criminals? That speaks to me! I get that. Plus, even if I wasn't a midnight hero, (which I was), I have a feeling I'd still love Boondock Saints because, at the end of the day, it's a funny, fresh simple action movie with likeable characters, Ron Jeremy, and a boob.
A winning formula.
All that said, you'd think I'd be thrilled at the prospect of Twondock Saints. You'd think that, but you'd be wrong. You'd be as wrong as Little Zviad, the former head of the now defunct Chechnyan mob, (which is to say, dead wrong). Instead, I couldn't be more unhappy. Troy Duffy made a good, concise street-hero movie with a great cast and a strong ending- why can't he just leave it alone? In a world where sequels, prequels and remakes seem to be the only choices, why not stand out and make something new? People loved the first Saints so much, the second one is almost guaranteed to disappoint, and I'm not the only person who feels this way. You know, an overweight nerd with too much power and absolutely zero shame once said "When you doa sequel that's very, very anticipated, people anticipate ultimately that it's going to be the Second Coming. And it's not. It's just a movie. Just like the other movies. You probably have fond memories of the other movies. But if you went back and looked at them, they might not hold up the same way your memory holds up." And who was that shameless, pudgy nerd? George motherfucking Lucas.
The quote comes from an interview he gave on the new Indiana Jones movie and serves as a preemptive "Eat Shit" to anyone who plans on being disappointed by the latest installment. Now, is George Lucas right or is he, as some writers have speculated, "an overweight nerd with too much power and absolutely zero shame"? Well, he goes pretty far with that quote. He's basically saying "Hey everybody, this new movie is probably gonna blow but, if you really think about it, the movies that came before it kind of blew, too. Suck it, America." I'd like to say he's just cynical, because I'd like to be really believe that Twondock Saints will be awesome. But he is George Lucas, and if there's one person on this planet who would know a thing or two about disappointing sequels, it would be him.
Movie rocked.
ReplyMy friends and I once tried to play a drinking game watching Boondock Saints where you took a swig every time someone said "f**k". We all passed out less than a quarter of the way through. Seriously I'm pretty sure they set a record with the number of f-bombs in that movie.
Replyok seriously there's no such thing as a chechnyan, it's a chechen. christ it's like nails on a chalk board
Reply Hide All See All 3 RepliesThere's no more Chechnyans beacause O'Brian killed them all of with his machete skills.
Haha! But seriously, we all know Chechnya isn't a real place.
Sounds like giovannisorta needs to simmer down.
Boondock Saints... I didn't get it. A buddy of mine loves this movie, it's his favorite. I watched it and wasn't impressed. There were a couple of chuckles I got, but that was it. As one reviewer put it, it tried too hard to be "cool." The plot was silly and their little "prayer" or whatever sounded like a nursery rhyme. Willem Defoe had moments of funny, but then moments of stupid. The, "It was a firefight" scene was the hokiest scene I've ever witnessed in a movie. The "religious" aspect was simply there to add artificial weight, trying to justify their actions. I think it would have been better to leave it out and just let them be unapologetic, "Punisher" style vigilantes. Were we really supposed to believe they were working for God? Terrorists supposedly do that, too.
ReplyThe best way to sum this movie up came from the AV Club-
"Boondock Saints is a movie for people who think Tarantino is too cerebral."
I know that nobody has been commenting on this article in months. But it's the only safe way I can contact you, O'Brien. I didn't realize who you were until just now. You probably wouldn't recognize me even if I saw you in person. I don't think you ever saw me that night. I worked under the aus**ces of the Chechnyan, and I have to warn you, Machete, because your life may depend on this: Zviad is not dead. He is alive.
ReplyAlready I've said too much.
I liked the first half of Saints...and the bit where William goes "THERE WAS A FIREFIGHT!" because that bit was really awesome. The second half is just kinda meh. Except the very end was neat, the courtroom speech and all that...and being a girl, the gay didn't bother me. :P
ReplyHopefully I'll be able to watch Saints 2 and not, after I exit the theater, feel like I need a shower/decide to disavow its existence/cry. For the love of sanity I hate crying during movies.
I freaking loved Boondock Saints. It's up on my shelf of Awesome, accompanied by other like-minded classics. But as for "Twondock Saints", I'm not looking forward to it. Well, I am, but not as much as I should be. Willem Dafoe will have NOTHING TO DO WITH IT! There will be no gay-but-fucking(rofl)-amazingly-hilarious-and-cool FBI agent to ridicule the boneheaded local cops. Sorry, pigs. Oh, and don't forget the cross-dressing. And bloody-hand-on-hair thing. Ew, but seriously, he was fucking sweet.
ReplyI liked it, mainly because I have this whole Irish fetish thing going for me though...
ReplyMy dad told me to watch it and I asked him to tell me what it was about and he got to "These two Irish brothers in Boston..." before I was out of the room with the movie XD
My friend spent Sunday and Monday... and Tuesday in Toronto (Boston) on the set as an Extra for a church scene... I'm excited about the movie but I'd forgotten I'd read it was even coming out until I signed on his facebook today lol.
One thing I REALLY liked was the fact that it was pretty entertaining. No romance, lots of death, and I am about 50% anarchist, so the vigilante justice entertained me. Anyways, I'm not saying the movies were great, or you know, one of the worlds best or anything, but it wasn't crap, and as long as the next one isn't crap, I'm pretty sure I'm gonna be just as entertained.
Seriously, Boondock Saints is every John Woo/Tsui Hark/Generic Hong Kong Action/Opera movie ripped off and blown wide Jesus open by Hollywood. It is awful. Just deal with it.
Replyi liked 'death wish' better.
Replyhopefully BDS 2 will be allowed to stay in theatres unlike the original saints movie, which was removed from the big screen following the columbine shootings....which is kind of ironic considering the theme of the movie was good men doing the correct thing by killing the evil around them
Reply[...] Used to Fight Crime- True story. Years ago, Gladstone and I cleaned up the streets of Rhode Island as famous [...]
Replylook, i loved the first saints movie...and i mean loved
Replylike, i would have sex with the dvd if i got the chance (and i have)
and while i agree that the sequel will probably be a letdown and it wont b nearly as good as the first, im still gonna go see it simply hoping it will be as good as the first
also, about Troy Duffey being a douche bag: he was a douche bag when he was making the first movie and that turned out to be great, so maybe it will work to his advantage
karten spiel...
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Lucas is a giant douche who panders to toddlers, but I think Duffy is just asshole enough to make it work. I'd also chip in to organize an event where Troy Duffy beats the shit of George Lucas and takes his wallet. He then uses the 8.7 trillion dollars in there to make about 100 more films that don't suck and buy us all a beer.
ReplyI live in Rhode Island. I guess I owe my safety to you.
Reply[...] duo. Dedicated followers of the blog will remember that, before we were bloggers, Gladstone and I worked as costumed street-vigilantes in Rhode Island, dubbed “M&M” by the media, because of our names, (I was “Machete,” [...]
Reply[...] then I realized something. Who needs to link to a real story? That’s for amateurs. Children. I’m the oldest Cracked blogger, and I’d better start acting like it. (I actually [...]
Replyi've seen bds like...3 times? maybe. i liked it. would i watch it again? probably not. even though it was entertaining, it gets boring. i'm betting bds2 is gonna be worse. and that thing about george lucas...funnnnnnny
Reply[...] Wednesday (he calls it “blogging candy) when suddenly I got an idea. Well, more specifically, my old crime-fighting buddy got an idea, but it was a good one: see what’s cooking on [...]
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