Like a lot of you, I am basically a monster, and as is the case every year, this holiday season has filled me with bile.
In the early days of the Web, a spectacular amount of disinformation was spread about video games around the vindictive nerds and eaten up by the gullible masses.
In the interest of karmic rebalancing, I've identified a number of rare mental conditions that, when looked at in a slightly different light, appear to be less a cause for mockery and more a cause for envy.
You're probably quite reasonably asking why I did this. Well, not withstanding my love for committing acts, this time I had some pretty good reasons. Here they are.
The media's nicknames are incredibly stupid. Not the public figures behind them. Not always.
It turns out that, indeed, the English language is seriously fucked up.
For the benefit of the courts, and to satisfy the conditions of my own court-ordered alternative punishment, I present this column on the six worst things human beings do to one another on public transportation, and how to avoid them.
The future is going to look an awful lot like 'Thriller.'
Everything you've learned from Hollywood about hacking has utterly failed to communicate just how boring it actually is.
Bad news: Your clone wants to kill you. Worse news: This guide is your only hope of survival.