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Here's Jessica Sierra, performing the king of all lame metaphor songs "Total Eclipse of the Heart" on American Idol in 2005:
Now here she is three days ago, right after getting arrested for fighting with three cops outside a club in Tampa:
Besides her radical, Madonna-esque reinvention as a meth-chic diva, how has Sierra helped nurture her stellar career in the music industry? Well, there was the obligatory sex tape, complete with yet another photo (right) that I’m sure has a special place on the Sierra family’s mantle. Alright kids, who wants to watch that have sex?! See, when I watch it, it’s research for an article. When you people do it, it’s sick. But the thing that elevates Jessica far above your average, ordinary self-destructing non-celebrity is contained in the last sentence of the AP article covering her most recent arrest:
“She entered a California rehab facility in July that was to be documented on VH1's reality show "Celebrity Rehab With Dr. Drew" next year.”
The woman, or rather the Producer maliciously filming her unstoppable downward spiral to fill a couple hours in VH1’s programming schedule, is a marketing genius. After all, the only thing we like better than watching another human being elevated above the common throng and singled out by Paula Abdul for their extraordinary talent is watching someone ground so thoroughly under God’s boot heel (God has a Western thing) that this happens to them:
In related news, look for these exciting reality shows on VH1 next season!
  • TMZ TV: Paris Hilton Cries for Twenty-two Minutes
  • The Anna Nicole Show: Tasteless Death Clips Edition
  • Flava of Prostate Cancer
  • My Super Sweet Secret Abortion
  • I Love New York 8: Cold and Alone
  • Hogan Knows the Pain of a Failed Marriage
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