When Carlos Mencia got a Twitter account, I knew it was a great opportunity to see how one of our finest comedic minds works. He’s the Bad Boy of Comedy! Except only he himself called himself that and it was only to set up a joke about how that’s a silly thing to call someone. I believe the punchline was, “Bad Boy of Comedy!? Hey, watch out mang, that guy tells jokes!” I know what you’re thinking: Mencia? Twitter!? This is going to be great!!! Let’s see what he says!
At first glance it looks like he nailed Manny Ramirez, but let’s look at the facts: That’s not a slam, a joke or an ironic observation. Carlos’ brain just threw up after some word association. More importantly, no one who has ever “banged a hot chick” would ever refer to it in that way. “Bang a hot chick” is something you say to your friends to celebrate the last moment of them not knowing you’re a virgin. He might as well have said, “Unrelated to the previous sentence, I hate how girls pee out of their butts.”
Speaking of fish, did your goldfish brain not remember Twittering about how “hystatical” South Park was 15 minutes before this, or 15 minutes before then, or 15 minutes before then? Keep it together, Carlos. You had your own television show and you’re acting like some attention-starved kid who got his picture in the paper for growing the county’s largest pumpkin.
If there are comedy clubs in Heaven, not letting Carlos Mencia in is a big part of how you got your Heaven zoning permit. That being said, the harmonious closed community of Heaven might finally give a funny context to his racist immigration jokes.
The Recently Dead: “Oh, wow, Heaven has a comedy club!”
Carlos Mencia’s Eternal Spirit: “It’s good to be here in Heaven, homes! Now that I’m dead, I only have two regrets: trying to make my own dynamite, and going into an autopsy with a stomach full of semen! Dee duhDEE! Mang, seeing all these Mexican faces tells me one thing… SAINT PETER NEEDS TO BUILD A TALLER GAAAAATE!!!! My cousin Pepe got in, and he isn’t even dead! You tell a Mexican there’s paradise over a fence, and he’ll jump it and go, WHERE’S ALL THE WEED AND HOOKERS FOR DONKEY SEX!!!”
T.R.D.: “This… doesn’t seem like Heaven.”
C.M.E.S.: “And all these babies flying through the air… it’s like the garbage can outside a MEXICAN ABORTION CLINIIIIC!!!! Seriously, mang, I’m just glad I died wearing clean underwear! Too bad it was… A THONG PANTY!!!”
T.R.D.: “Oh fuck, I know where this is, guys. We shouldn’t have done all that rape.”
Nothing says I have a rich and fulfilling personal life like open invitations for anyone, please anyone to come play video games with me. “Tomorrow I’ll be appearing at the unemployment line and the jock itch spray section of your store’s dick cream aisle. Don’t let me die alone!”
I don’t think I get it. Is it funny because sick people had to climb, or because there probably wasn’t any fence involved? Wait, I think I know what this is. It isn’t an actual joke–it’s a test run for Carlos Mencia-brand refrigerator word magnets! Maybe your fridge broke in the catapult ride over the border, illegal immigrants, but at least it will look funny, mang! “The swine flu is burritoing my cousin at Home Depot AIDS with my favorite Hurricane Katrina!”
My Latin history is too rusty to know if he’s insulting El Salvador or insulting camouflage. When I hear “Salvadoran freedom fighter,” I don’t think “racist non-Mexican(?) comic who needs to lose 40 pounds.”
In a world where many celebrities have to hide from the paparazzi and fans, it’s refreshing to see one that posts his whereabouts on the Internet and begs for company. When Herb Jefferson Jr., “Boomer” from the original Battlestar Galactica, comes home from a long day at the autograph booth with 17 dollars, he reads Carlos Mencia’s Twitter and says, “Man, that’s just sad.”
I’m not a psychologist, but if you feel intellectually superior to someone because they’re wearing a mask on an airplane during a media frenzy about diseases, you might be giving yourself too much credit. I once saw him set up a joke about natural selection by mocking the audience for not knowing what natural selection was. That was what, fifth grade for most of us? It helped me understand Carlos better as a comic. He assumes we’re all stupid because for some reason, he thinks we only went to school until age 10. Even if that’s true, at least we can spell “flight,” professor Mencia. You goddamn retard.
Does it really count as social criticism when the society you’re criticizing only exists in your Meximagination? “People are stupid! All these people are confusing cereal commercials for the news! That’s Boo Berry, not Peter Jennings, you dee duhDEE! What next, do they elect Honey Comb President!!??!? I’m out!”
Carlos obviously thought a lot about the masked lady he saw on the plane that morning. He didn’t change his mind about her–she’s still a dumbass. But AIDS people… they’re not dumbass enough. Let’s work together and make a change.
I was actually proud of Carlos for this Twitter. It’s almost the start of a real joke. It’s an ironic observation that only eight or nine out of 10 people would think of, and he even adds a twist. You see, when normal comics are being irreverent with tragedies to add an edge to their comedy, they use tragedies as the punchline, not the setup. The basic rule is: joke setup, joke setup, AIDS!!! Carlos does the opposite, almost certainly because he’s a fucking idiot, but maybe he’s onto a whole new way of thinking. Let’s take a look at an example.
Regular Joke Construction: “Nothing ruins sex with a monkey like remembering that you work in an AIDS research center.”
Mencia Joke Construction: “i got AIDS from haveing sex with monkies. come by n say hi if your at the aids research center and ill buy you a shot.”
Is Mencia pulling the race card because someone heard his act and assumed he was Chicano? Because holy shit, if he’s not, that adds a whole new level of that’s-not-OK-to-say to all that talk of beaners and fences. Oh well, I just hope the local radio station can find a more appropriate holiday for him to appear on. But do Mexicans even have a holiday where they celebrate some asshole stealing all their people’s jokes?
Again, Mencia tries out his tragedy, tragedy, SETUP! approach to comedy writing with hilariously unfunny results.
In order for this joke to work, Carlos is taking for granted that we already know something about Mexicans having sex with pigs. Is that a real stereotype? If it is, and we also assume that swine flu comes from pig sex, then yes, those same people might also fuck a donkey and create a donkey flu. I see what he was going for, it just seems like a lot of hoops to jump through in order to create a reality where the line makes sense. Plus, now that we’re existing three concepts deep in some magical realm of animal fucking, where’s the joke? That someone fucked an animal? Of course they did! That’s what we do here!
On top of confusion, this series of leaps in logic makes the end result completely unrelatable. You can’t tell someone about the hilarious donkey flu joke you read on Carlos Mencia’s Twitter because they’ll have so many questions during the setup. It’s like saying, “My friend does a terrible impression of Chewbacca from the movies Star Wars. he loses so many contests! well I wonder what would it be like if he got a job as a casher at a dildo resturant? hed be like, *BAD CHEWBACCA SOUNDS!!!*”
Twilight is that movie where angsty gay vampires do each other’s makeup in high school, right? And instead of sunlight exploding them, it turns their skin into body glitter? I’m not judging you, man. That’s a really, really cool thing to enjoy.
I love that he doesn’t include an example. It’s apparently funny enough for us to know that Somalian pirate jokes are out there somewhere. If I know Carlos, the joke starts with lots of people tragically dying from pirate crime, and then he moves on to them being idiots. “Hellllooo!? If the innocent don’t like being raped, maybe they should stop sailing their ass up to PIRAAAATES!!! Oh, are you a pirate? Well then I should turn the fuck around! You won’t ever see Mexicans getting attacked by pirates! Because you get your feet cut off trying to carjack a lawnmoweI’M A RACIST!!!”
Is God trying to tell you that you don’t have any Latino fans?
I’m going to assume by “lever” he meant “lover” since levers are seventh grade physics, and he’d have felt the need to explain. The instructor probably took one look at him and realized that his love life was trying to suck his own dick until his third chin choked him unconscious. So yes, this incredible yoga thing you discovered is going to be great for that.
It’s not clear what happened at the end of this one. “Oooh”? Is that from all the great ideas exploding out of his head at once, or is that a sudden realization that his view of the world is based on 15 minutes of a George Lopez routine that he stole?
Maybe his future isn’t in writing a book, but in being a TV critic. This is just really solid writing.
Is he trying for a joke? I’m not sure I can tell anymore.
This is the second time in two weeks that a shooting has prevented Carlos Mencia from performing. Is this the go-to excuse for getting rid of him, or are people actually shooting themselves when they hear he’s coming?
Carlos Mencia ice skating. Now I’ve heard everything.
For tweets that are funny on purpose, follow Cracked on Twitter.
This entry was posted on Thursday, May 21st, 2009 at 3:00 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
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October 26th, 2009 at 12:18 am
I don’t know. Usually I laugh at what Seanbaby writes, sometimes while getting angry at him getting paid despite the odd spelling error.
But this time…this time. I don’t know. I’m not from America, but it seems like this guy is from “American Idol:Downies” or “America’s Got Talent:Speds Special” or something…and I just don’t think it’s right to mock people who are actually mentally retarded or spastic or whatever.
This struggling immigrant mentally handicapped person is living the American Dream. Proving that even if you’re foreign and retarded, you can make a go of it in the land of opportunity.
Is it right to mock the afflicted? I just don’t know.
I mean, I laffed just as hard as anyone else at tardblog, but this is different. Somehow more personal, somehow sadder.
October 21st, 2009 at 2:01 am
I LOVE SEANBABY! seriously the best writer on Cracked.com.
ALSO… Carlos is a sonofabitch!!! what a dick!
October 11th, 2009 at 8:42 pm
This was well written and very funny! I agree with all points. Carlos needs to learn how to write better material or even invest getting writers if he wants his career to stay afloat.
His jokes are awful and he doesn’t seem well educated. You almost feel bad for him because of how painfully and obviously lonely he is.
Also I was thinking about how he must Google himself all the time. I bet he reads/has read this many times. The weird over defensive posts seem to me that…well…, they are probably him. Sad so sad.
He really sucks. No other way to say it.
October 11th, 2009 at 8:39 pm
This was well written and very funny! I agree with all points. Carlos needs to learn how to write better material or even invest getting writers if he wants his career to stay afloat.
He jokes are awful and he doesn’t seem well educated. You almost feel bad for him because of how painfully and obviously lonely he is.
Also I was thinking about how he must Google himself all the time. I bet her reads/has read this many times. The weird over defensive posts seem to me that…well…, they are probably him. Sad so sad.
He really sucks. No other way to say it.
September 29th, 2009 at 5:03 am
Loved it. You should so do a follow-up.
September 27th, 2009 at 3:47 pm
Wow. Thanks, Carlos. Your “tweets” gave me brain cancer just from reading them
September 23rd, 2009 at 7:44 pm
Actually I used to think he was funny. Then I watched that Joe Rogan video. Yeah, thats when it hit me. I had been duped.
Gay fish yo.
September 22nd, 2009 at 11:21 am
This is a fucking great read! Carlos has always been a bitch, and he says the same shit over and over and over! Fuckin’ hack! He’ll end up at Taco Bell for eight and quarter soon! Boo Mencia! Whiney, un-talented dip shit!
September 17th, 2009 at 4:06 am
I think this is for anyone who 1) never thought Mencia was funny and 2) thought he really was the scum of the earth when it was discovered that he a) isn’t Mexican and b) steals material from others. So you who defend Mencia can eat the made-in-Taiwan burritos that he consistently shits out of his mouth somewhere else - this article isn’t for you.
September 3rd, 2009 at 11:42 am
“Was this article written by Joe Rogan” Hahahahaha
Of course it’s necessary. Having to be even remotely exposed to the “tweets” of his hackery is enough to make fun of him. And by remotely exposed I mean within 300 miles of a computer that accidentally You Tubed Joe Rogan making fun of Carrot Tops impression of sucking Carlos Mencias only mexican friend, Gerardo Montoya, penis hole.
September 3rd, 2009 at 3:57 am
Wow, I’m not even a Mencia fan but you seem to be super bitter about anything that man does… Was this article written by Joe Rogan
Pretty much past the first two posts this article just goes into completely retarded unnecessarily critical garbage
August 19th, 2009 at 11:53 pm
Carlos Mencia is so washed up it’s really sad. I pity him, but he’s still not funny enough to acknowledge his existence. Give him a year or two and he’ll be forgotten along with all of his horrible jokes.
August 17th, 2009 at 2:14 pm
heres another one “They told President Clinton there were American women being held in North Korea. True pimp that he is,he went to N Korea and got his hoes.”
August 16th, 2009 at 5:35 pm
loved it. it just proves that he can’t come up with any good shit himself. and when he does, its just a big pile so steaming shit…
August 16th, 2009 at 8:46 am
you can do better than this, but you picked a hell of a deserving target
fuck u carlos mencia
August 15th, 2009 at 9:38 pm
who cares? just because this guy is a comedian, doesnt mean EVERYTHING he posts has to be hilarious or well planned.
This whole article just proves that the author is quite scarily bitter and judgemental.
I got halfway through, and thought it was quite sad…
August 15th, 2009 at 9:24 pm
When reading the Herb Jefferson Jr. crack I thought “Wait, Boomer was a chick”, but then I realized I had just hit a weird, sad medium of geekiness.
Such shame…
August 15th, 2009 at 2:11 pm
Not funny, too many of those twitter comments were funnier than your whole article.
You failed, sir.
August 14th, 2009 at 6:48 am
The best sentence from this article: You goddamn retard. I could not stop laughing.
August 12th, 2009 at 11:10 pm
Seanbaby steals the show again!
August 12th, 2009 at 5:18 pm
Was this about Joe Rogan? Look who cares if he steals jokes, or if he is mexican or what ever all that matters is he is not funny! if your a doctor you make people better in you work at taco bell you make tacos and if you are a comedian, you make jokes, and if those said jokes are not funny than you should have to find a new job! Carlos go find a new job!
August 9th, 2009 at 6:30 pm
Dont know what you guys are talking about, just read a few comments. All i gotta say is George Lopez has jokes and hes actually pretty funny, saw his newest stand up on hbo yesterday for the first time, me, my girl and friend were laughing non stop.
August 9th, 2009 at 2:59 pm
Carlos Mencia once said that no matter where he goes in the country he becomes something different. In Florida, he is Cuban, in New York he is Puerto Rican and not until he returns to the Southwest, like in L.A. does he again become Mexican.
August 9th, 2009 at 2:53 pm
I see, this guy fills auditoriums, clubs, casinos, etc. with people laughing and some dick on this site says he isn’t funny, that is going to somehow dampen the enthusiasm of his fans and ruin his career? That is what Joe Rogan hopes. I am sure some of the zipperheads who watched “girls gone wild” think Joe is great. He was so funny that when he and another guy took over the Man Show, it died, no one watched it anymore. That is how popular Joe Rogan is. He is only popular because he does the shows no one else wants to do. Gee, I am sure most of mainstream America is sitting and watching people eating camel shot mixed with dog assholes and thinks that is great. The people who watch JackAss and think professional wrestling is real are the ones who think Joe Rogan is outstanding. He is a dick and and has killed everything humorous that he has been attached to.
August 8th, 2009 at 8:09 am
seanbaby, been reading your stuff for a really long time, but this one is just kind of meh at best. although maybe that is a very nice commentary on the unfunny nature of carlos mencia’s “humor,” or whatever in the hell he calls it. “deeduhdee, see, i just said my catch word, now laugh you fuckers, because i am the funniest non-beaner beaner in the whole damn world!!”
August 4th, 2009 at 1:05 pm
[...] a more in-depth review of Carlos’ tweetings from Cracked.com, where people way funnier than me live. Category: Miscellaneous / Tags: no tag [...]
August 3rd, 2009 at 4:23 pm
Cancer of the eyes is pretty extreme.
The whole battle he had with Joe Rogan was hysterical. Joe Rogan shames most people he debates with, and this annoying prick was no different.
August 3rd, 2009 at 10:41 am
also joeRoganfan i hope u die from cancer of the eye so menica can come kick u in your balls and say fuck u
August 3rd, 2009 at 10:36 am
he needs a second chance like michial vick
August 3rd, 2009 at 10:35 am
just for give him the jokes that he stole he mad them funny he like it when south park killed him and mad fun of him also i like his stand up.
July 31st, 2009 at 9:03 am
I don`t think seanbaby is Honduran.
July 30th, 2009 at 8:33 am
you fat stupid fuck I hope your mother dies of cancer of the eyes, maybe then you can steal her dead corpse and fuckin ruin it like you do with everyone elses jokes when you steal them and than just try and say them in a different tone with a few changed words. you fucking stupid honduran Nigger if I ever saw you i’d fucking kill you you cocksuckin fat miserable piece of shit. YOUR NOT FUCKIN FUNNY. Your a fat stupid fuck with an ugly wife.
July 30th, 2009 at 8:33 am
I think all you haters are dee dee dee’a Carlos is a great comedian so get off his nutz. Carlos you are the man
July 29th, 2009 at 1:52 am
I love you, Seanbaby
July 28th, 2009 at 2:53 pm
monkies is the buddhist cereal i eat for breakfast.
July 28th, 2009 at 12:51 pm
Mencia is a sloppy, unfunny thief. And now I know he can’t spell for shit. I did not think it was possible to have less respect for this fucking hate monger. Oh and the last time I checked Ned (his real name), Honduras was a third world country, so loose that smug self serving attitude.
July 27th, 2009 at 7:41 am
The amount of comments on this page make the browser scrollbar really tiny. Enjoy this information.
July 26th, 2009 at 5:06 pm
Hay guys, I have a joke!
What do you call a Somalian Pirate?
A sea monkey! lololol.
July 25th, 2009 at 7:26 pm
jay olsen are you retarded? your whole first statement applies to ANYONE with a twitter account…
July 25th, 2009 at 2:09 pm
Couple things i wanted to say:
1) I don’t get why he’d steal jokes from George Lopez. Maybe I haven’t seen any of his good sets, but everything I’ve seen from him has not been funny whatsoever (same goes for Carlos though)
2) Yes, he’s a douchebag who deserves all that he’s gotten, but Kanye West IMO is a MUCH bigger douchebag who hasn’t gotten nearly the amount of hate he should
July 25th, 2009 at 2:09 pm
Couple things i wanted to say:
1) I don’t get why he’d steal jokes from George Lopez. Maybe I haven’t seen any of his good sets, but everything I’ve seen from him has not been funny whatsoever (same goes for Carlos though)
2) Yes, he’s a douchebag who deserves all that he’s gotten, but Kanye West IMO is a MUCH bigger douchebag who hasn’t gotten nearly the amount of hate he should
July 18th, 2009 at 7:48 am
I love how Mencia thinks that his life is super interesting to Twitter about it.
Seriously, what was he thinking, that the latino fans will all jump fences to hear what their king has to say?
What a fat moron! I can’t wait for mencia to choke on a sandwich!
July 17th, 2009 at 12:48 pm
Carlos Mencia’s way too easy to make fun of, Joe Rogan has all the credit for really fucking with him first. Still a pretty funny article, but not SB’s best.
July 13th, 2009 at 12:22 pm
That’s Carlos Mencia for you..
July 13th, 2009 at 11:17 am
Jumpin’ on a bandwagon, good ol’ bandwagon, the hate Carlos Mencia fuckin’ bandwagon…do do do….wonder who’ll we hate tomorrow? Do do do….
July 13th, 2009 at 12:03 am
1.) This article wasn’t any funnier then the comments it targeted… Besides which it was only 25… Are there only 25 posts?
2.)If he sucks why are you on his page?
3.) Give me one original joke based on no one or nothing ever done in the history of mankind… And proof that it is 100% original as well as funny.
4.) Last, but not least - why do you care? If you hate it avoid it, commoning fuckin’ sense.
July 10th, 2009 at 10:59 pm
good god i hate this man. ive been asking the lord in heaven to strike him down since the day he first polluted this earth with his presence.
thank you sean and the creators of south park for doing to this man what i can only dream of. now my only wish is that he somehow stumbles across this page, perhaps in a search for material to steal or while googling his own name for pics to whack to.
July 7th, 2009 at 10:03 am
I haven’t laughed out loud like this in so long. People have been saying that Carlos Mencia is a shithead who steals other people’s work, but never before has an asshole been ripped open so wide.
Carlos Mencia needs to read this and promptly hang himself. Com by n say hi LMFAO
July 5th, 2009 at 9:17 pm
To: EricS Says:
July 3rd, 2009 at 9:52 pm
not that i really want to defend mencia, i still wish to point out two things
1. Alot of these that you say aren’t funny, arent supposed to be.
2. Twitter has a character limit, most people will misspell words on purpose in order to save space.
—-Sorry for being a dick, but, Alot is 2 words: “a lot”. Is Twitter’s character limitations your exuse for not being able to spell?
July 3rd, 2009 at 9:52 pm
not that i really want to defend mencia, i still wish to point out two things
1. Alot of these that you say aren’t funny, arent supposed to be.
2. Twitter has a character limit, most people will misspell words on purpose in order to save space.
June 26th, 2009 at 9:19 am
Sir Jorge, having the balls to get on stage and actually being funny when you’re up there are two different things. Carlos Mencia is probably the worst comedian I’ve seen in a long time, and I’m a fan of Dane Cook, so obviously I’m fucking retarded. Carlos’s career is talking, and he can’t even fucking write properly.
June 25th, 2009 at 11:20 am
sir jorge, I think what’s happened here is that Seanbaby has actually succeeded where someone else has obnoxiously failed. I think I’d rather be in his shoes than Mencia’s, because I’m honestly not sure how ol’ Neddy boy sleeps at night.
June 24th, 2009 at 9:00 pm
In a way, sir jorge, seanbaby is on several very widely-viewed stages on internet sites and publications everywhere. Also, it may be better to try and fail than never to try, but it’s much more fun to laugh at failure.
June 24th, 2009 at 5:08 pm
tremendous value broham
June 24th, 2009 at 4:14 pm
Since when do you have to have the same profession as someone to hate them?
June 24th, 2009 at 3:43 pm
it’s funny that so many hate, yet they can’t get on a stage themselves
June 24th, 2009 at 10:51 am
Mencia has been around since the early 90s. I remember seeing a few specials he did way back then, he’s always been pretty mediocre. Even back then i remember thinking he wasnt anything special. I wouldnt say “bad” necessarily, but certainly not good enough to warrent anything more than maybe an opening act for Carrot Top or Gallagher. I was pretty much floored when he re-surfaced in the mid 00s, being billed as one of the funniest comedians around. I think it basically came down to comedy central desperatly trying to recapture their “Chappelle show” ratings, and needed someone ethnic to recapture it, preferably who would work for cheap.
June 24th, 2009 at 7:17 am
You got me… It’s me Carlos or should I say Ned. Who the hell else would defend me? Even my mother hates me for all the racist jokes I make, not because they’re racist but because they suck and I stole them from George Lopez. I didn’t think anyone would notice, I mean who the hell listens to George Lopez… Well I’m off to promote racism and make fun of the handicapped. PEACE!!! (disclaimer: I am not Doovid or Carlos Mencia thank the good Lord)
June 23rd, 2009 at 10:44 pm
To Doovid.
My suggestion to you, Would be: A: Get a sense of humor. Or B: Drink some bleach. He’s just observing about mencia being a dipshit. Not like this should be a shock. A man who became famous by saying DeeDeeDee, is not a genius. Get off this guys nuts.
June 23rd, 2009 at 10:40 pm
Even I think he’s a bad comedian and I’m a fucking retard.
June 23rd, 2009 at 7:06 pm
ummm…. no he’s not trying for a joke by saying so sad about the victims… your really pretty pathetic for writing this article… it sounds like maybe you got picked on a lot when you were younger? or maybe still do? write something funny
June 23rd, 2009 at 10:50 am
Enough with Kevin bashing. The man has a point, even though Carlos happens to be a disabled comedian. I think it’s time for majority of these kids to hop of the Cracked writers dicks, as every comment section has plenty of them attempting to be noticed.
June 23rd, 2009 at 2:46 am
My bad! The paragraph in last comment was a quote.
June 23rd, 2009 at 2:44 am
For a few glorious seconds I pretended the Carlos Mencia comment below really was from Carlos Mencia. Please, someone, make him aware of this and post the rebuttal, because you just know he’d write something.
You know if he really has no life it might actually be him.
And no offense Sean but your an Effin Grammar Nazi!!!
June 21st, 2009 at 9:42 pm
Carlos Mencia blows turds.
A lot of potential here, but Seanbaby couldn’t deliver. Go back to EGM, or whatever is left of it.
June 20th, 2009 at 6:10 pm
The biggest thing that bothers me is him saying H town. ugh. If you’re not going to call it Houston, the abbreviation is H tine. Please.
June 20th, 2009 at 5:16 pm
For a few glorious seconds I pretended the Carlos Mencia comment below really was from Carlos Mencia. Please, someone, make him aware of this and post the rebuttal, because you just know he’d write something.
June 20th, 2009 at 12:48 pm
[...] [...]
June 19th, 2009 at 10:06 am
That Mencia in Heaven routine is the funniest thing that Mencia’s name has ever been attached to. He actually MIGHT steal that routine, since it’s tighter and funnier than ANYTHING he’s come up with.
June 19th, 2009 at 8:53 am
I would love to have the opportunity to punch him in the face. He’s an unfunny, apparently semi-literate jackass. He should take some hints from the writer of this article.
June 18th, 2009 at 4:59 pm
why does Carlos Mencia have to live? like even mosquitos feed spiders or some shit, but Carlos Mencia is like a plague.of terrible terrible sad humor attempting shit. Maybe he uses up all the bad jokes so that others won’t use them, he’s kind of like a bad joke fire, and the shit he spews out is the smoke. Sure it burns your eyes, and is annoying and dirty, but eventually it will go away.
June 18th, 2009 at 10:03 am
carlos mencia is a fucking jackass
June 16th, 2009 at 5:13 pm
I love the word “douchbaggery”. Thank you for noticing.
It’s a word perfectly applied when used to describe the actions of an asshole joke thief like Carlos fucking Mencia..
Old Carlos the joke thief has been slapped around and roughed up by at least four different comics for stealing their material over the years. Most notably, George Lopez slapped the piss out of him after he used a bunch of Mr. Lopez’ jokes in a show not too long ago out in L.A.
How he got his own T.V. show is a mystery. He’s not funny. The ethnic thing goes thread bare pretty fast and when thats all you have you’re sort of screwed. One trick pony, is the term, I think, to describe a meat puppet like this clown.
When you can push a Man like George Lopez to come to your gig and confront you on that level, well, I’d say that rises to the level of “Douchebaggery”, wouldn’t you?
So thanks again for pointing that out. It’s a great word, I just love the way it rolls off the tongue.
Cheers,
C.J. Anderson
June 16th, 2009 at 3:38 am
That guy’s so fucked up (mencia)
(Yeh i live in Mexico City and i think that guy should quit all the bitching about my country if he doesn’t even live here)
June 16th, 2009 at 3:24 am
So, C.J., are you saying that you don’t like something Mr. Mencia said, or just that you really really like the word “douchebaggery”?
June 15th, 2009 at 7:09 pm
Usually I have to pay for that sort of torture.
Having to look at that fat little face over and over as I scrolled down. Breath taking.
This my friends, is one of the finest examples of American douchebaggery that I’ve ever seen. Douchebaggery in it’s purest form, practiced by a grand master of the art.
I had only heard rumors of douchebaggery on this scale prior to reading Mr. Mencia’s “tweets”.. Amazing.
This Man has thrown down the gauntlet. He has set a new gold standard for douchebaggery.
June 15th, 2009 at 6:53 am
Goddamn, I love you, seanbaby.
June 15th, 2009 at 1:13 am
I think when he was saying there would be a donkey flu next he was referring to the fairly well known phenomenon of the donkey show where a girl gets fucked by a donkey.
June 14th, 2009 at 4:17 pm
I don’t know what’s worse, the fact that I didn’t know this wasn’t real, or the fact that Mencia strikes me as the type of person who would say this kind of stuff…
June 13th, 2009 at 1:26 pm
BRILLIANT
i was actually crying with laughter
oh bravo seanbaby
i knew you would win me round
June 13th, 2009 at 7:38 am
Im not a mencia fan but damn you like to hate
June 13th, 2009 at 7:09 am
Funniest article ever!!! All the retards defending Carlos Mencia make it SO much more amusing, especially that dick Kevin “You are only hurting yourself,” omg- what a loser.
June 12th, 2009 at 11:51 am
[...] thoughts are delivered to other people would make you think about them a lot more. But that is just not the case. Or maybe the mistake I’m making is thinking that with careful thought these peoples’ [...]
June 11th, 2009 at 10:04 pm
Oh wow, whats funnier? The bashing or people trying to defend Carlos? Not quite sure yet. Though I mean, I would totally defend him if I was a ‘mexican’ too. They all stick together don’t they? Then when you piss one off they all come runnin’ like a stampede of brown people with gu– oh wait thats black people. NEVERMIND!
This article though? Hillarious. When stars get washed out and do anything for attention.
June 11th, 2009 at 9:34 pm
I love how it says that every time Mencia is trying to go somewhere like the hospital or CNN some shooting happens. Hahaha “are people actually shooting themselves when they hear he’s coming?” That’s great haha
June 10th, 2009 at 9:38 pm
Man, I was so upset when Chappelle’s show got cancelled. Then Mind of Mencia came along, and it totally sucked balls. Dude did the same routine, like every show. You should keep this segment going, if only you could find someone more batshit crazy. Good show, Seanbaby…keep the shit coming.
June 9th, 2009 at 12:58 pm
Mencia is as funny as my dick is long. And if the thirty minute fit of laughter that followed the impromptu unveiling of my cock to my new girlfriend while we were waiting in the McDonald’s drive-through is anything to go by, Mencia is about as funny as anal warts. Which I also have.
June 9th, 2009 at 8:07 am
Seanbaby owns.
June 8th, 2009 at 7:31 pm
I miss the “Chapelle’s Show” days…
This guy [Mencia] has to be the most un-funny human being ever to call himself a “comedian.”
I also think that Twitter is quite possibly the dumbest thing ever created. The internet has been overrun by retards who feel compelled to keep everyone posted on how often their bowel’s move, or what they’re eating for breakfast, lunch and/ or dinner- who gives a Sh**?!
and! I’ve been on XBOX live ever since ‘06 so when I saw that this guy actually posted his gamertag inviting people to play Call of Duty with him, I had to check his stats and… he fu**ing sucks… really bad… like, he’s just a walking target type bad.
That’s it for me.
June 8th, 2009 at 10:27 am
oh wow…
Kevin, this is comedy at it’s best
I don’t see how you can think that mencia is funny but think this isn’t
And what the fuck are you doing to “contribute to the good of the world”?
Defending a blatantly racist fucktard that gets paid insane amounts of money to be as not funny as a comic could possibly get away with.
And sean is obviously not hurting himself by writing this…. That’s about the dumbest fucking thing you could have possibly put.
Bottom line, carlos is quite possibly the worst comedian on tv, and everything in this column is legit, not to mention epicly funny.
Grats sean, kevin here apparently doesn’t recognize real comedy
=D
June 8th, 2009 at 7:40 am
Qmarx, that was the most fucking idiotic comment I’ve ever read… masks are weared to prevent contagion.
Jump from a bridge and land on some rocks you fucking asshole.
June 7th, 2009 at 10:40 pm
No, Kevin, you’re wrong. Carlos Mencia is a plague.
June 7th, 2009 at 1:47 pm
STOP BASHING CARLOS… BORRRRRRRRRING
Jesus, get a life! Carlos is just a fucking comic. He’s not Osama Bin Laden.
So Carlos was excited to be on South Park. I would be excited too. Wouldn’t you?
All you bitter comics who love to hate on other comics… you only hurt yourselves. The real winners in life are the people who cheer for other peoples’ successes and look forward to their own. If you are not a Carlos fan, simply don’t buy/listen to him.
Your negative energy and anger about Carlos only hurts yourself. When you realize there is plenty of success for everyone… only then you will thrive as a comic and more importantly as a human being.
Seanbaby, put all that negative energy to good use and contribute to the good of the world! Sounds like deep down you have a lot to offer.
June 7th, 2009 at 12:05 pm
I don’t know what’s funnier, the article or the 14 year old spastics who are defending Mencia.
June 5th, 2009 at 6:21 pm
Dude, the people who wear masks are the people who are already infected with something and don’t want to spread it. The mask prevents transmission, not infection
June 5th, 2009 at 6:03 pm
Ned is still around? I guess as long as there are real comedians to steal from, he’s always going to be employed. Sad.
June 5th, 2009 at 1:14 pm
Cracked kills Mencia’s jokes…
Just a little something to get you through the weekend… Mind of Mencia star Carlos Mencia has been torn a new hole by plenty of critics… but Cracked.com’s new article takes trashing the comic - and his Twitter account - to a whole new…
June 4th, 2009 at 12:39 pm
MY GOD! This is so hilarious it almost justifies Mencia’s existence.
June 3rd, 2009 at 7:13 pm
i think the yoga/lever thing was an attempt at a pun also.
Good lord :
“This is the second time in two weeks that a shooting has prevented Carlos Mencia from performing. Is this the go-to excuse for getting rid of him, or are people actually shooting themselves when they hear he’s coming?”
-this paragraph is funnier than carlos mencia will ever be.
June 2nd, 2009 at 7:25 pm
you know, it was really hard to even read as far as i did. i couldn’t finish this article because i’m deeply upset by mencia’s stupidity.
…not really ‘deeply upset;’ i’m kind of a drama queen. but seriously, jesus h christ.
June 2nd, 2009 at 9:32 am
Hey Cry Baby Bob Crawford, Carlos Mencia is not funny. I don’t really care if you know him, or if 500 people thought he was funny, because he is not funny. Also, your opinion doesn’t have any credibility anymore. Why? Because you think Carlos Mencia is funny.
What are funny though are his Twitter posts, which I’m pretty sure are actually written by a 9 year old girl, therefore, I’m not giving him credit for that either.
June 1st, 2009 at 2:10 pm
Please tell me you got that yoga/lever joke. Super lame, but still technically a joke!
May 29th, 2009 at 10:00 pm
this actually teaches you alot about the right joke and joke making, nice
May 28th, 2009 at 9:40 pm
Fantastic. Carlos Mencia is an obnoxios moron.
May 28th, 2009 at 5:39 pm
carlos is a piece of racist crap and Sean knows enough to treat him as such
May 28th, 2009 at 11:44 am
I work at an office and I’m laughing so hard I’m worried they’re going to fire me. The one about people shooting themselves because of Carlos coming…. I’m about to lose it again.
May 28th, 2009 at 9:54 am
I think that you’re article was funny, but at the same exact time I think Carlos Mencia is funny as well. That’s a hard paradox to come to terms with, I admit. I think George Lopez is far worse than Mencia and uses some of that reverse racism stuff
May 28th, 2009 at 2:12 am
Hahaha, looks like Boohoobaby is the last guy on earth who still thinks Carlos Mencia is funny.
May 27th, 2009 at 3:48 pm
Doesn’t Sean have Joe Rogan’s dick to suck?
Mencia bashing from Cracked? Seriously? A few jokes is fine, but this goes from absurdist humor filled with hyperbole and exaggeration to quite possibly the “un-funniest” article on Cracked in a long ass time.
Quit hanging out with the MMA jerk offs and go back to being funny.
May 27th, 2009 at 12:24 pm
I think that Seanbaby is upset because of Carlos Mencia’s undeniable genius at something. Also, who is Carlos Mencia?
May 27th, 2009 at 7:05 am
This guy is garbage, and not funny. I hope one day that people stop giving him air time so I never have to see his ugly and retarded face ever again.
May 26th, 2009 at 11:00 pm
well you know what they say about critics. I think it would have applied it to cracked commentors if they had been around at the time.They are like eunuchs in a harem; they know how it’s done, they’ve seen it done every day, but they’re unable to do it themselves.
May 26th, 2009 at 7:09 pm
Rooster - Wasn’t rushing to defend your honor. Couldn’t give a damn about your town. I was pointing out that Seanbaby was following Mencia’s joke formula that he was giving him so much crap for.
So, to recap: Mencia sucks, this article disappoints, and you, sir, are a dumbass. I hope, in time, you’ll come to realize what a fool you’ve been.
May 26th, 2009 at 6:53 pm
This was brilliant
May 26th, 2009 at 6:33 pm
Nah. I’d rather this article didn’t exist. It was okay, but I’d rather have a refund of the time it took me to read it.
May 26th, 2009 at 6:16 pm
Carlos Mencia may be an easy target, but then, so are the retarded, and making fun of them always proves to be a true delight as well. Great article.
May 26th, 2009 at 2:56 pm
George Lopez isn’t funny either
May 26th, 2009 at 1:11 pm
I don’t know how you do it, but another damn funny article!
May 26th, 2009 at 9:31 am
@Ajna: No, that really is Mencia’s twitter. Honestly.
May 26th, 2009 at 7:00 am
[...] 3 - The world’s unfunniest celebrity Twitter feed - Cracked [...]
May 26th, 2009 at 2:30 am
Erm… Seanbaby? Honey?
You *are* aware that’s not Mencia’s twitter, yes? “LaughPunisher” didn’t tip you off? Really?
Someone who hates Mencia set up that Twitter. The article WAS funny… But not very, because of that fact.
May 25th, 2009 at 10:32 pm
The funniest comments are the ones saying, “You didn’t UNDERSTAND Mencia’s joke! Let me break it down for you.”
Yeah, we all *got* Mencia’s jokes. The problem is, unfunny jokes are just statements. That’s why they’re easy for you r-tards to get them.
May 25th, 2009 at 7:49 pm
I wonder how many of the defensive posts are just Carlos himself making up different screen names. I mean, can there actually be that many people that have no sense of funny?
May 25th, 2009 at 6:35 pm
This was hilarious! Nice job.
May 25th, 2009 at 4:19 pm
[...] Carlos Mencia’s twitter is terrible. Man, I fucking hate him. I would fist fight him right now, given the chance. [...]
May 25th, 2009 at 2:58 pm
I would like to say that I don’t justify murder or any kind of violent behavior for that matter.
But there’s a first time for everything.
May 25th, 2009 at 11:28 am
Wow…this was really unfunny. It’s disappointing because Seanbaby is usually spot-on with the jokes. I guess there’s a first time for everything.
Oh, and the quote about AIDS was exactly right. That one needs to be repeated for the world to hear.
May 25th, 2009 at 10:44 am
Carlos Mencia isn’t very funny but unfortunately neither are you. Out of all of the dumb shit Mencia says, this is the worst you could find? The most entertaining part about this post is although his comedy is pretty uninspired and thoughtless, you’ve demonstrated that it’s still beyond your comprehension. Plus, making fun of Carlos Mencia is so last year.
May 25th, 2009 at 9:00 am
Finally, some justice in this world.
May 25th, 2009 at 8:34 am
“Everyone hates Mencia because they heard everyone hates Mencia”
Really? I hate Mencia because I heard Mencia. Whether his jokes are stolen or not, he’s just not funny. Abrasiveness and racism are poor substitutes for humor.
May 25th, 2009 at 6:44 am
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May 25th, 2009 at 3:13 am
@boobs
Agreed. Everyone hates Mencia because they heard everyone hates Mencia.
May 25th, 2009 at 12:41 am
I haven’t laughed so hard at a Seanbaby post in a long time, reminded me of the wonderful game reviews I loved to read when EGM was still around. Keep up the good work.
May 24th, 2009 at 8:00 pm
The comment about AIDS was coherent. You fail.
May 24th, 2009 at 3:54 pm
I don’t think you understood the first joke. He’s saying that based on what Ramirez said, it’s implied that you can get away with anything if a doctor prescribes it. Like, “Yeah, I killed four people, but my doctor told me to.”
Nevertheless, Carlos Mencia fucking sucks.
May 24th, 2009 at 3:31 pm
great stuff
May 24th, 2009 at 5:21 am
Like I said Hich, I’m from Binghamton (where one of the shootings took place), and I’m far from offended. No one needs you to come rushing to defend our honor. Cram it crybaby.
May 24th, 2009 at 4:39 am
Seanbaby…I’ve read this article probably 13 or 14 times now and every time I do I find another reason to laugh out loud. Out of curiosity I went to Carlos Mencia’s twitter and have decided you need to do monthly updates. Just go through and pick out the most unfunny, narcisstic, mispelled tweets and add your commentary. <3 <3 <3 it!!!
May 24th, 2009 at 2:37 am
a few of those tweets are ironically funny but the donkey joke is genuinely humorous.
May 23rd, 2009 at 10:31 pm
“This is the second time in two weeks that a shooting has prevented Carlos Mencia from performing. Is this the go-to excuse for getting rid of him, or are people actually shooting themselves when they hear he’s coming?”
Way to go, Seanbaby. Tragedy, tragedy, PUNCHLINE!!! Either you’re being ironic, or a hypocritical dumbass.
May 23rd, 2009 at 10:12 pm
Umm.. No. Just that, no more no less. No.
May 23rd, 2009 at 8:38 pm
Someone should ask Carlos about his recent nephew born in March 2008 that his brother Joseph fathered…little known secret.
May 23rd, 2009 at 7:55 pm
Thank you. Seanbaby is the best thing to happen to cracked in a long while.
And I hope Carlos Mencia sucks cocks mercilessly in hell. Unless he’s into that, in which case I hope he doesn’t.
May 23rd, 2009 at 5:55 pm
LOVE. LOVE. LOVE.
May 23rd, 2009 at 2:16 pm
I love this because it’s not Seanbaby doing comedy, it’s Seanbaby trying to explain to the world how much he hates Carlos Mencia. It’s been a while since I’ve seen such pure, unbridled bile.
May 23rd, 2009 at 1:17 pm
Carlos joke stealing Mencia admits he likes Twilight. ’nuff said.
May 23rd, 2009 at 11:56 am
the fact that that asshole (mencia) makes more money than you is proof that god hates us all
May 23rd, 2009 at 11:26 am
I had to actively ignore the pictures to get through this bitch. Goddammit, goddammit to hell; fuck you Mencia, your ass should be filled with a never ending stream of hot iron rods covered in barbs made of berber carpet.
May 23rd, 2009 at 11:24 am
[...] Carlos Mencia’s Twitter: 25 Posts Too Unfunny to be Stolen | Cracked.com HILARIOUS!!! I can’t stand Mencia, that joke stealing bitch. __________________ http://s16.photobucket.com/albums/b3…randon%20Rush/ Collecting…Brandon Rush [...]
May 23rd, 2009 at 10:18 am
i love you seanbaby
May 23rd, 2009 at 10:08 am
I couldn’t finish this article. Why? Because I can’t read through more than 2 Carlos Mencia quotes without trying to rip my hair out.
Thanks for the adrenaline rush.
May 23rd, 2009 at 9:47 am
Good old Cracked stuff. Here are more fun videos, “Best of Sarah Silverman” http://tv1.com/playlists/162
May 23rd, 2009 at 4:55 am
ive never heard of this mencia bloke before reading this article…and now i hate him too =D thanks cracked!
May 23rd, 2009 at 4:51 am
Re: the shootings…
I am from the Binghamton area. Since that tragic day on April 3rd, my community has been trying hard to find something positive to take away from the shooting at the American Civic Association. I will pass the word on to my community that the incident halted the spread of Carlos Mencia, so that we may look to the future with our heads held high.
Thank You Seanbaby!!
May 23rd, 2009 at 4:27 am
“The instructor probably took one look at him and realized that his love life was trying to suck his own dick until his third chin choked him unconscious.”
You should have written for a video-game magazine or something with that kind of insight and depth.
May 23rd, 2009 at 3:50 am
ouch..I was never a fan of Mencia, stealing jokes aside - most of his humor rotates around racial accents or horribly racist and derogatory comments.
May 23rd, 2009 at 3:04 am
Because it bears repeating:
Everyone hates mencia because they heard everyone hate mencia.
May 23rd, 2009 at 3:03 am
Everyone hates mencia because they heard everyone hate mencia.
May 23rd, 2009 at 2:46 am
His shitty humor that you made up for an impression of him, was actually funnier than his shitty humor that he makes up himself. He should rip you off and copy your impression of him. So sad.
May 22nd, 2009 at 11:36 pm
Seanbaby,
You are a cold glass of ice water in an otherwise empty desert wasteland of the internets. I have been reading your stuff for a while now and it makes me giggle like a school girl. THANK YOU FOR BRINGING LAUGHTER INTO MY LIFE!!!
(Seriously, this is funny shit.)
May 22nd, 2009 at 11:16 pm
Fantastic work. From his twitter I can see that it must be hard to pass a spelling test while trying to climb a fence.
May 22nd, 2009 at 9:50 pm
Fuck Carlos Mencia. As a Mexican-American, I’m ashamed that he’s even remotely associated with us. I guess those Honduran jokes weren’t killing them softly. Am I right holmes? But seriously, fuck Carlos Mencia. I got Joe Rogan’s back and I’m sure every half-way decent comedian feels the same way he does. I hate to admit this but I actually bought a DVD of this fucker. Goddamn, I would’ve been better off putting that money towards an anal gaping by two armless midgets. Motherfucker………..
May 22nd, 2009 at 9:48 pm
Mark Says:
“Bob, you sure he wasn’t making the room laugh with *your* material?
Choose your friends more carefully next time.”
Why yes Mark, I’m certain. Not with my material, or anyone elses that I could tell. As I stated before, I personally watched the man perform for 2 1/2 hours to a packed house of 500 without one butt leaving a seat. I can tell you. first hand, the overwhelming majority of his material was improvised on the spot. The man worked the entire room without missing a section, or a nationality, race, physical attribute, mental shortcoming or regional location.
Consider this…is it possible that, when delivering material about “touchy” subjects, ie race, rape, feminism etc…the performer isn’t making light of the subjects, but rather, the idiots who make those same statements in everyday life?
I always choose my friends carefully Mark.
May 22nd, 2009 at 9:47 pm
Lets take this one a little at a time…
Danjer047 Says:
“Wow, that Bob Crawford guy is standing up for Carlos Mencia… It doesn’t matter whether or not he is a good person with a good heart… He isn’t Mexican and yet makes horribly racist jokes about Mexican people… He may be able to entertain people in his demographic, “Stupid people and racists” so maybe the room was chock-full of them. ”
Yes, I am standing up for him. I can do that because I have PERSONAL and PROFESSIONAL experience with the man. If we translate that, it means *I* know MORE about him than YOU do, get it? You’re correct, he is not Mexican, he’s Latino of Honduran decent. So? I’ve made jokes about the Japanese and I’m not Japanese. Im also white and made a LOT of jokes about white people. Have you ever been to his show, live? This whole “racist” crap is so far off base it’s just pathetic. Carlos makes fun of EVERYONE, Japanese, Black, White, Fat, Skinny, Mentally challenged, Redneck, Young, Old…he literally leaves no one untouched. Do you have a conceptual understanding of “comedy”? Is a Black Comic who makes fun of Blacks “racist”? Try to establish a firm grip on reality BEFORE you engage in a conversation with content you have zero understanding of.
Danjer047 Says:
“He steals jokes from everyone and his “best” bit is to say “Dee duhDEE” and make fun of mentally handicapped people… Wow, he really does sound like he has a heart of gold. I bet he goes to mental hospitals and completely tears the room apart with “WhAt?!? Your waring a helmit right now!?!? Your not ridin a bike! Dee duhDEE!!!!!!!!!” I’m sure his “fans” really appreciate it. ”
You begin this paragraph with such authority, yet *I* KNOW you don’t have a clue, about Comedy OR Carlos. I dont think there is a Professional Comedian out there, myself included, who hasn’t been accused of “stealing” material. Ever heard of a thing called “parallel thought”? Happens ALL the time. Has Carlos stolen material purposely? I DON’T know, and, frankly, neither does anyone else, including YOU. Only he knows for certain.
Perhaps some time in the future, BEFORE you draw uneducated opinions, you might catch Carlos live at a venue and listen to the end of his act VERY carefully. It’s the part where he, very sincerely, tells the audience how important it is to be able to laugh at yourself.
Danjer047 Says:
“He isn’t even edgy. His best jokes go something like this: “White people jump like this, Black people jump like this… Mexican people jump over fences!!! HAahAHhaha!!! *Mexican Hat Dance* playing in the background.” You can usually see the line between jokes about race and racist jokes and with Mencia, the line is non-existant.”
I seriously doubt you’ve ever heard his best, really.
May 22nd, 2009 at 9:05 pm
Man, I’ve read this article like a dozen times.
Saxton Hale:
You are hilarious for typing that. Nice to see another Neely fan.
May 22nd, 2009 at 7:37 pm
“Babies through the air like a Mexican Abortion clinic” is hilarious-way more funny than Carlos Mencia could ever be.
He’s definitely not Mexican. I think he’s half-Honduran, half-white(probably German).
So he’s a mixed Euro-Central American….
May 22nd, 2009 at 7:04 pm
Seanbaby commenting on how unfunny Carlos Mencia is?
Pot meet kettle.
May 22nd, 2009 at 5:56 pm
Dude, Carlos Mencia sucks, we get it. But the way you’re jocking his twitters for anything funny to say makes you look lame.
May 22nd, 2009 at 5:11 pm
[...] meant nothing. But sometimes, I get a small lift like the one my wife gave me when she sent me this link, and I am pleasantly surprised to find that there is a sufficient enough number of others out there [...]
May 22nd, 2009 at 5:07 pm
The article was funny at first, though it seems out of context like some of these weren’t meant to be jokes in the first place.
That’s not to say that the ones that were meant as jokes were particularly funny…
May 22nd, 2009 at 4:43 pm
I NEVER thought Mencia was funny. But this is sad. It’s akin to whenever someone I knew said he was nowhere near Latino, and was born in the Middle East. Not that it would be a bad thing, just that it would make him a larger fraud. Now his Mexican jokes remind me of how American’s make fun of Canada.
May 22nd, 2009 at 4:00 pm
Awesome. Can we have one about how much Dane Cook blows next?
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May 22nd, 2009 at 3:36 pm
To unnecessarily reiterate the fact, the AIDS/swine flu joke was stolen. Not sure where it originated but I read that quote almost verbatim in a copy of USA today a couple of weeks ago.
May 22nd, 2009 at 2:43 pm
seanbaby, your addition to the cracked lineup proves that the universe trends positive.
May 22nd, 2009 at 2:33 pm
Thanks for this public service.
I can’t stand Mencia so much when I see him on tv I have to change the channel-(even Wolf Blitzer is funnier). I thought it was just me who didn’t think he was funny.
Whew, what a relief.
Tnx seanbaby, I can stop my therapy now. Maybe I’m not a racist after all.
May 22nd, 2009 at 2:30 pm
Yeah, the swin flu mask/ AIDS condom joke is most definitely stolen. Google it, you’ll see it was making the rounds way before Mencia caught on.
shocker!
May 22nd, 2009 at 2:28 pm
the donkey flu joke is amazing. he just pulls the rug right out from under himself.
2 shootings in one week?
May 22nd, 2009 at 2:27 pm
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May 22nd, 2009 at 2:27 pm
“Oh fuck, I know where this is, guys. We shouldn’t have done all that rape.”
Well sure, everyone’s got 20/20 hindsight.
May 22nd, 2009 at 2:23 pm
HAHAHAH amazing, would read again
May 22nd, 2009 at 1:35 pm
Kurt, you do realise that you could just go to his twitter now and look at every twitter he has ever posted.
You don’t need to monitor it 24/7.
Bob, you sure he wasn’t making the room laugh with *your* material?
Choose your friends more carefully next time.
May 22nd, 2009 at 12:35 pm
lol @ all the comments defending Carlos
May 22nd, 2009 at 12:09 pm
I’m not sure what’s worse. Mencia doing twitter or someone actually paying attention to his twitter for a whole month on a daily basis to write this article. Hmm…
May 22nd, 2009 at 11:59 am
For someone who dislikes Ned/Carlos, you spent a lot of time studying his act. dude, you sound like your obsessed. your Jokes mocking Carlos were 4th grade Recess insults at best. Carlos has a good sense of humor if he finds this shit funny. You just are on the Joe “Chode” Rogan band wagon. joe’s just pissed because no one laughs at his Act.
May 22nd, 2009 at 11:20 am
Hey so I was walking down the street and some guy’s car had broken down and he said “hey man can you jump my car?” I was like “YO MAN I JUST JUMPED THE FENCE MY LEGS ARE STILL TIRED!” He started laughing. Then, I jumped him and stole his tires because I’m a beaner.
May 22nd, 2009 at 11:05 am
Hilarious article, even better that it’s over Carlos, who is in fact, not hilarious at all. He isn’t the greatest at spelling and grammar either.
May 22nd, 2009 at 10:24 am
Like some others have said, I’m neither a fan or hater of Mencia.
That was pretty damn funny though.
Be interesting if that really is Mencia in the comments.
May 22nd, 2009 at 9:37 am
Haha I found this to be very funny. I have to thank my PR guy Frank for finding this blog post. Keep up the great work and maybe 1 day you will make $$$ like myself
May 22nd, 2009 at 9:27 am
Wow, that Bob Crawford guy is standing up for Carlos Mencia… It doesn’t matter whether or not he is a good person with a good heart… He isn’t Mexican and yet makes horribly racist jokes about Mexican people… He may be able to entertain people in his demographic, “Stupid people and racists” so maybe the room was chock-full of them.
He steals jokes from everyone and his “best” bit is to say “Dee duhDEE” and make fun of mentally handicapped people… Wow, he really does sound like he has a heart of gold. I bet he goes to mental hospitals and completely tears the room apart with “WhAt?!? Your waring a helmit right now!?!? Your not ridin a bike! Dee duhDEE!!!!!!!!!” I’m sure his “fans” really appreciate it.
He isn’t even edgy. His best jokes go something like this: “White people jump like this, Black people jump like this… Mexican people jump over fences!!! HAahAHhaha!!! *Mexican Hat Dance* playing in the background.” You can usually see the line between jokes about race and racist jokes and with Mencia, the line is non-existant.
May 22nd, 2009 at 9:18 am
That was the one of the funniest articles ever… I laughed so freakin’ hard at this part:
“Hellllooo!? If the innocent don’t like being raped, maybe they should stop sailing their ass up to PIRAAAATES!!! Oh, are you a pirate? Well then I should turn the fuck around! You won’t ever see Mexicans getting attacked by pirates! Because you get your feet cut off trying to carjack a lawnmoweI’M A RACIST!!!”
Yes, I had to copy and paste the entire thing… It made me laugh so hard that I had to stop reading for about 3 or 4 minutes to recover… I hate Carlos Mencia soooooooooooo much.
May 22nd, 2009 at 8:52 am
Let me begin by saying, “comedy is subjective”. Each of us has a different “trigger”. The mark of a good Comedian is being able to CONSISTENTLY entertain an audience and, by sheer name recognition and reputation, sell tickets at a venue.
I am a retired Comedian. I worked with Carlos in the past, many years ago. I watched in awe as he entertained a room of close to 500 for 2 1/2 hours, and, it was the late show on a Saturday night to boot. Not a single butt left a seat until he was finished and it was non stop laughter. That says a LOT about his talent in my book.
As for Carlos the person, as far as I’m concerned, he’s one of the best guys in the business. I’m well aware of all the crap that floats around the net about him, and all I can say is, from knowing him personally and working with him on more than one occasion, he’s good people, with a good heart and a big talent.
As far as Twitter goes, ANYONE’S “Twit”, I think they’re all voyeristic diatribes aimed at allowing the masses to live vicariously through the adventures, or lack of adventures, of others. Harmless enough UNTIL they become obsessions, or until WRITING about them becomes an obsession.
May 22nd, 2009 at 8:12 am
I applaud you for suffering through and compiling his Twitters and then writing on it…it was hard enough reading it.
I’m not a fan or a hater of Mencia, I’m indifferent, but good job anyway!
May 22nd, 2009 at 8:04 am
Oh man…..this article had my giggle meter going all out. Good one seanbaby. You just keep getting better and better. I used to think your articles were like written versions of Dane Cook’s unfunny hyperactive performances but this had me lol-ing
May 22nd, 2009 at 7:59 am
That was one of the best Cracked articles I have ever read… can you please spend your entire day just commenting on every single one of Carlos’ tweet… seriously!!!!!
= )
May 22nd, 2009 at 7:23 am
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May 22nd, 2009 at 7:18 am
Funny article. Some people need a giant cup of that chill the goddamn fuck out juice shit they sell at the fuck fuck bang bang store for people who need a fuckn bang.jesus.
May 22nd, 2009 at 6:45 am
Wow, I have hated Carlos Mencia since his Comedy Central Heydey of stealing old Dave Chappelle bits and recycling them. ( a Beaner President? How fresh and irreverent!)
With the emergence of this article I simply feel sadness, not just at how large aloser he is but how dimly aware of it he really is. If I was a 1/8th rate comic playing local s cali clubs and begging for people to play x box w me then id probably just put a shotgun in my mouth and end my troubles. Carlos, I think you should take one for the team. I know there will be slightly less racist mexican humor in the world to bring us closer together but I think we could manage.
May 22nd, 2009 at 5:49 am
Carlos mencia’s real name is Ned. Is this guy trying to be white or what. In person this mofo tends to avoid Latino’s in general this guy is racist and people need to be aware of it. Its sad to say that this is one of the latinos who feels he us better than anyone.
May 22nd, 2009 at 5:35 am
“He still makes more money than you.”
A ha. Well, I would not be too sure about that. But if it were true, it just goes to show that having enough money to eat at a restaurant in Tarzana (wtf) does not guarantee that anyone will want to be seen eating even near you.
Seanbaby’s site ??used to?? have pictures of really hot young women, oh, I dunno, throwing thongs at him or whatever. The pictures must have gotten to the 100s, and I am assuming those are only the legal ones. Haha. Guys too. And he does attract cool people… who do yoga for the right reasons, for instance.
God I feel old. You have lived the good life Seanbaby. I am jealous.
May 22nd, 2009 at 5:29 am
An unfunny article about a comic who steals jokes. How did this get on digg?
May 22nd, 2009 at 5:29 am
Not a fan of Carlos, but wow, what was the point of this article? About as funny as one of the jokes you were trying to lampoon. You could find any comic and nitpick at their jokes. Guess you have something personal against Mencia
May 22nd, 2009 at 5:20 am
MaxTeezie-
Hi Mencia! I didn’t know you stole jokes from Cracked as well! Maybe you should take some advice!
May 22nd, 2009 at 5:10 am
Does anybody notice that Mencias and Seanbaby are polar opposites?
Mencias is not funny and always makes you feel like you need a shower if you pay any attention to him at all. He makes you feel incredibly smart too. Who would think that Mencias is awesome? He is a clown. A boob.
Seanbaby… usually clean and sharp. Clever. Imagine… Mencias cannot even spell, apparently. Seanbaby has been writing forever. And Seanbaby makes you feel stupid, but just a little bit, and in an enlightening, non-threatening way. I think it is the goofy smile and mohawk. Plus he kicks Hitler’s ass.
In Bizarro world, Seanbaby would be Mencias.
May 22nd, 2009 at 4:28 am
ditto MaxTeezie, this article was kind of depressing because it just seemed like one giant cheep shot/soap box hatefest…
May 22nd, 2009 at 4:17 am
In his defense, no joke is funny if you explain it. But, let’s be honest, we need a guideline to know when he even jokes.
Great article.
May 22nd, 2009 at 2:42 am
This was terrible. I wasnt a Carlos Mancia fan before but now i have sympathy for him. The venom at this point is unwarranted. I get the whole “he’s a hack” stuff but this article was nitpicking for no reason. Nothing he tweeted was bad. Are you really commenting on his typo’s. There are a couple in your own article. And his was done on a cellphone. Everyone who thinks this is funny just wants to be part of the “Mancia Hater Train”. He is not funny but neither was any of this.
May 22nd, 2009 at 2:39 am
“Even if that’s true, at least we can spell “flight,” professor Mencia. You goddamn retard.”
I laughed so much, Seanbaby, you are becoming my favourite read on Cracked.
May 22nd, 2009 at 1:45 am
Carlos Mencia is real? I assumed he was a character the Wayans Brothers made up.
May 22nd, 2009 at 12:49 am
HAHA, i havent laughed so hard in a long time, awesome article.
May 22nd, 2009 at 12:47 am
While reading the Mencia posts, I’m pretty sure my face looked something like o_o with furrowed eyebrows, trying to understand what the fuck he was talking about.
Is he trying to be funny?
He’s not popular in Australia (but by the sounds of it he’s not in America either) so I don’t know if he’s just a retard, or he actually believes he is god’s gift to the world?
May 22nd, 2009 at 12:46 am
I hate this guy. I hope Joe Rogaine does an ‘Oh Shit’ MMA guillotine choke on this son of a bitch. His twitter feeds are like the beaner version of Floyd Mayweather Jr.’s uncloseable mouth. Fuck those guys. Fuck you Carlos Menstealia!
May 21st, 2009 at 11:37 pm
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May 21st, 2009 at 11:25 pm
The saddest thing about him misspelling ridiculous is that you can’t even put it down to a typo because ‘i’ and ‘e’ are basically at opposite ends of the keyboard.
May 21st, 2009 at 11:12 pm
Wow, this is a fairly savage critique of Carlos Mencia. Funny, but savage. Such vitriol, its really quite admirable.
May 21st, 2009 at 11:12 pm
Hey LiamC, true story, I was like you once. Then I grew a brain, a dick, and a heart.
May 21st, 2009 at 11:11 pm
i fucking hate this fool. what a plagiarizing, unoriginal, idiot. thanks for being a dick carlos, if that is indeed your real name.
May 21st, 2009 at 10:26 pm
I’m on Carlos Menicas Xbox 360 friendslist. The Guy is so anal he won’t talk on mic but will text. Since he saw I have Joe Rogan on my twitter list he refuses to talk to me. Instead he has two 15 yearold teenagers talk for him. Sad thing is that. Im a freakin mexican and this queer only talks to pre teen white boys. He’s a total ass pirate and boy lover. Somebody call Michael Jackson . Carlos Mencia is passing around his Jesus juice.
May 21st, 2009 at 10:25 pm
Hard hitting on a soft target, done well. Thanks seanbaby. Why is that not the first time I’ve said that?
May 21st, 2009 at 10:12 pm
“My appearance on CNN has been canceled because of the shootings. I did a show in Binghamton last year. So sad about the victims.”
Wait, victims of the shootings or of his show?
May 21st, 2009 at 9:49 pm
I just want to know who subscribes to Mencia’s twitter with the assumption that they will eventually read something funny.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:43 pm
i don’t know what’s more sad: Carlos Mencia himself or the people that find ANY opportunity to flame him. get the fuck over it already. the guy made bucks with other people’s shit. we get it. i hear tons of comics do it ALLLLL the time, but because this idiot made it bigger than most of them, he’s the target? you’re coming off as haters. and i find haters more pathetic than the losers they hate. ignore this douche bag, and he’ll fade away in to history. then we can all get together and watch his e! true hollywood story and laugh our asses off. the worse part is, joe rogan is one of this idiot’s haters. and i love joe. he’s an awesome guy. it disappoints me that he even give this guy any attention. not that joe cares what i think, but still, disappointing just the same.
kids: hating someone takes too much energy and it says more about you than whom ever you’re hating.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:24 pm
hahaha! I love that LiamC
If you look closely *GASPS*
It doesn’t end with the tragedies being the closing note of the article…its actually Carlos ice skating.
If you wanted to make a point, you shouldn’t have put so much detail into it.
Ok? lmao
May 21st, 2009 at 9:23 pm
I swear I almost felt sorry for the guy when I read his desperate pleas for companionship. Then I looked at the picture of his stupid face and became enraged again. Fucking tool.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:22 pm
Seanbaby, this was epic-hilarious. Well done!
May 21st, 2009 at 9:18 pm
Holy Christ, that actually had me laughing out loud. Welcome aboard, Seanbaby.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:17 pm
I rather enjoyed this, on of the better articles in my opinion. Although i never saw the South Park episodes, but from the few Mind of Mencia episodes i was unfortunate enough to find myself watching, all those jokes were really his mannerisms. Terrible. Although i do feel slightly bad for him offering to buy people lunch to come be his friend. I do think those children got a better fate probably being shot/dying of cancer over hearing his stand-up to “put some smiles on their faces”. The only smile i’d get would be giving him whatever i was dying of.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:16 pm
Let me recap this article.
First: Carlos Mencia is stupid heres examples (funny)
Second: He’s unpopular and desperate heres examlples (funny)
Third: HE CAN’T SPELL WHAT A LOSES (relatively funny)
Fourth: Look, two tragedies happened with some obscure connection to Carlos Mencia, connection made, people are killing themselves to avoid him! (WTF? Cracked, seriously that’s fucked up, take it back, douche bags.)
Way to end on a high note Cracked, MAD was always better.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:11 pm
Also: Rush, take a fuckin’ pill and throttle back. This website’s a three-ring circus, you don’t like the tricycling bear? Take a peep at the fire spitter.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:10 pm
Sean, baby, once again, HILARIOUS article…still waiting on that Capt. Cold/Atom addition…I can do this all day. It’s the internet, it’s not like I’ve got anything BETTER to do.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:07 pm
VV Umm..this is a blog! We’re not reading these for school ya know? Cracked writers don’t have to write essays/articles here for your pleasure or just to please anyone…
Btw..if you look closely you see there’s a title for this article pointing out what it’s about, if you know what it’s about and you know you won’t like it then don’t read it and waste your time!
Seriously…
May 21st, 2009 at 8:58 pm
This is one of the worst articles I’ve read on this site, and i have read all of them. Mencia stealing jokes is old news, and SB steals shit loads of jokes anyway. This whole article is practically stolen, SB even stole Mencia’s mannerisms from South Park, and probably got the (late) idea to do jokes about him from south park. And how the hell did he include things that obviously weren’t jokes, probably just had to reach a word goal and didn’t have enough to say, i find this disappointing.
May 21st, 2009 at 8:46 pm
Ok…I admit I was a fan of his , but that was before I knew he stole jokes and routines. The thing that really bothers me now is the fact that this fatty isn’t a beaner!! Im mexican, therefore Im a true beaner! This guy needs his show canceled ASAP, its just not funny anymore and knowing that he’s not a beaner is bugging the fuck out of me!!
lol I feel better now….breathe slowly
May 21st, 2009 at 8:37 pm
SB. Welcome to Cracked. I think you’ve finally arrived. I don’t even know who Carlos Mencini is but you served him good. Nice work!
May 21st, 2009 at 8:34 pm
He probably didn’t say anything about the pirate joke because he’s afraid it’ll get stolen.
May 21st, 2009 at 8:33 pm
Wow. I usually hate seanbaby’s stuff. Like, really really. Out of all the columnists, he’s (you’re? I don’t know if you actually read this) my least favorite. I think it’s because he doesn’t do the standard first name, last name like the regular guys/general American populace.
In any case, this was really hilarious and I will do my best to ignore your ridiculous byline from now on. Good job.
May 21st, 2009 at 8:33 pm
Wow…did he rape you with an aids-swine-flu burrito, or something Seanbaby? You guys need couples counseling quick! Still…that was HILARIOUS!
May 21st, 2009 at 8:23 pm
I read that swine flu/aids comment on a blog awhile ago. I’m going to assume that’s the real life fish sticks joke.
May 21st, 2009 at 8:16 pm
that might be the funniest thing ive read on cracked
May 21st, 2009 at 7:38 pm
say “I” if you hate Carlos Mencia!!! TOTAL RACIST FUCKING ASSHOLE. walked out on his show 20 minutes after it started.
May 21st, 2009 at 7:20 pm
DAMN! Are you sure your name isn’t a pen name for Joe Rogan?
All of this is right on….that dude is completely talentless….
May 21st, 2009 at 7:17 pm
I love the realistic Mencia Joke Construction. My only complaint is that there were so many pictures of his porcine mug next to the text.
May 21st, 2009 at 7:14 pm
http://www.cracked.com/blog/a-special-look-at-carlos-mencias-twitter/#comment-88173
CARLOS MENCIA SPOTTED
May 21st, 2009 at 7:12 pm
Just wait until Carlos hears about this article. I smell an epic fued brewing.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:55 pm
“The swine flu is burritoing my cousin at Home Depot AIDS with my favorite Hurricane Katrina!”
i love it
May 21st, 2009 at 6:52 pm
The second-to-last tweet was the greatest one. Ever since I read the 20 worst video games article on your website I liked you, glad to see you’re still fucking hilarious.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:42 pm
So fucking hilarious. I haven’t laughed out loud (so much that I cried) from reading an article in ages! Thank YOU Seanbaby!!
May 21st, 2009 at 6:29 pm
I used to think you suck, but you just keep getting funnier and funnier. I think I can safely say you’re one of my favorite Cracked writers now.. wow
May 21st, 2009 at 6:29 pm
Awesome. Anything that knocks Menstealia down a few pegs is good enough for me.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:28 pm
Seanbaby, as much as i pains me to say this about my own countrymen, most Americans don’t know the first thing about natural selection or evolution. So Carlos Mencia was right.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:23 pm
Oh my lord. I thought that my love for Cracked.com was unmatched. Before this article, Cracked was a beacon of light in an otherwise… well still bright, but one beacon less bright of a life.
Then you wrote this. And made me see god.
Well done.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:16 pm
Wasn’t exactly blown away, but then again your source material didn’t give you a great deal to work with. As far as the jabs for spelling, that might have just been to fit within the 140-character limit. Even chubby, racist, vaguely-Hispanic hacks are bound by the laws of Twitter.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:09 pm
I never found Carlos Mencia funny, pretty corny. How the hell did he ever get a show in the first place?
May 21st, 2009 at 6:08 pm
This reminds me of how much of an ass Carlos Mencia is. He’s definitely a twatterer.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:07 pm
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May 21st, 2009 at 5:58 pm
re: http://www.cracked.com/blog/a-special-look-at-carlos-mencias-twitter/#comment-88173
ctrl f “idiot” appear twice in the article. “fucking idiot” once.
What were you going on about now?
May 21st, 2009 at 5:54 pm
This blog post is as funny as the Carlos Mencia tweets that you guys are criticizing. So let me get this straight.
You actually comb through his post to write an Cracked article about how unfunny he is or how unfunny his tweets are and you are wasting our time with this thing?
Interesting.
Follow my lame tweets at http://www.twitter.com/thecrypticone
May 21st, 2009 at 5:52 pm
This article was fucking hilarious. Great job, ignore the faggot haters.
May 21st, 2009 at 5:50 pm
You know how some people are kind of magnetized or something, and they always set off store alarms? Seanbaby is the same way, only with comedy. Nice job.
May 21st, 2009 at 5:48 pm
Second last tweet nearly killed me.
Holy shit, havn’t laughed that hard in ages.
May 21st, 2009 at 5:46 pm
“He isn’t really racist, seeing as he pokes fun of everyone in just about equal measure”
Uhhh people can be racist towards all races. Even if he treats races equally, he’s treating them all badly.
I suppose we could just call him a misanthrope and call it a day.
Also, am I correct in my assumption that seanbaby was the name of someone who wrote for EGM, and that person is the one who wrote this?
May 21st, 2009 at 5:46 pm
wow, this is gold.
May 21st, 2009 at 5:42 pm
This one was pretty good seanbaby, there were points where my laughs were actually audible.
Keep it up
May 21st, 2009 at 5:34 pm
sean youre the best!
May 21st, 2009 at 5:31 pm
Wow Seanbaby, Mencia is actually almost as unfunny as you. Please, stop pooping on Cracked and go back to hell or wherever you went after you stopped being funny ten years ago.
May 21st, 2009 at 5:31 pm
[...] Mencia is Dan Cole? Carlos Mencia’s Twitter: 25 Posts Too Unfunny to be Stolen | Cracked.com Many similarities. __________________ [...]
May 21st, 2009 at 5:29 pm
This wasn’t that funny, but reading anything about how fucking terrible Carlos Mencia is is worth the time.
May 21st, 2009 at 5:23 pm
I’m glad you have found a new home Seanbaby. Fantastic article, I’m glad that I’ll be able to read your stuff every week.
May 21st, 2009 at 5:23 pm
I’m not a Mencia fan, but calling him a racist is stupid. Most people who play that card would also think making fun of his accent is racist.
May 21st, 2009 at 5:19 pm
I wish to become a better lever.
May 21st, 2009 at 5:17 pm
No, didn’t like the article at all. Just not funny.
I don’t even know why I commented.
May 21st, 2009 at 5:17 pm
Anyone who ever thought Carlos Mencia was a talented comedian has a serious intellect deficiency.
Carlos Mencia is funny the same way a my 90 year old Aunt Velma is when she does her routine striptease for guests. You feel sorry for the people who had to bear witness at the end.
She was a wily old coot in her day, and I was the only kid to get a lap dance on his 13th birthday!
May 21st, 2009 at 5:13 pm
Jesus, I laughed out loud at the joke about the friend witha bad Chewbacca noise.
May 21st, 2009 at 5:10 pm
I can’t stand Carlos Mencia … He’s a hack, and a thief, but if you hate him so much, why are you reading his twitter? Seriously man. Besides … everyone knows what a douche he is … do a piece on something more current, or maybe something funny. Geeze dude, why do they let you write here?
May 21st, 2009 at 5:08 pm
… u fucking dickhead!
PS: I give your Mother great pussy farts!
May 21st, 2009 at 5:05 pm
If you dislike Carlos so much, then why in the world are you paying such close attention to his tweets? I don’t like him either, but that is why I know next to nothing about him or what hes up to.
May 21st, 2009 at 4:59 pm
“I hate how girls pee out of their butts”
I will recall this line all day and crack up.
Seanbaby is the greatest.
May 21st, 2009 at 4:55 pm
LMFAO going to a hospital but it got canceled due to shootings. Lmao
May 21st, 2009 at 4:53 pm
One bit I don’t think Senbaby understood was the “What are Mexicans doing with pigs?” joke.
There used to be/maybe still a “Donkey Show” in Mexico where girls would have sex with donkeys.
So asking if Donkey flu was next was implying Mexicans were having sex with pigs.
That joke was somewhat funny.
May 21st, 2009 at 4:51 pm
Not sure what’s worse: The comments Mencia posted to twitter, the fact that you commented on 25 of them (and likely read more than that) or the fact that I took the time to read half of this and comment on it.
May 21st, 2009 at 4:50 pm
Taking someones personal posts and making jokes outta em. Ironically this is just as low as Carlos Mencia.
May 21st, 2009 at 4:45 pm
I’m gonna have to agree with meow and Zildar on this one. You called him “a fucking idiot” like what, six times? I realize he’s a sucky comedian but just restating that fact isn’t any funnier. His mother is Mexican and his father is Honduran, so I’m pretty sure he isn’t a “non-Mexican”. Most of your jokes are retarded.
May 21st, 2009 at 4:45 pm
Wow, making fun of Carlos Mencia was funny a year ago. Maybe next you’ll wrrite about how lame Dane Cook is.
May 21st, 2009 at 4:45 pm
Awesome article. I don’t understand Carlos Mencia….I ignore him but he just doesn’t go away. >_<;
May 21st, 2009 at 4:42 pm
Congrats Seanbaby, after all of your column posts, you finally made me enjoy one.
I knew I hadn’t lost faith in you yet!
May 21st, 2009 at 4:37 pm
I thought he was half Mexican and Half Honduran (Wikipedia). That still makes him part Mexican.
Also, what a fucking douche. Stop Carlos Mencia!
I thought this was very funny.
May 21st, 2009 at 4:35 pm
“Is this the go-to excuse for getting rid of him, or are people actually shooting themselves when they hear he’s coming?”
Hahahaha
May 21st, 2009 at 4:30 pm
Fuk that was some funny shit. DIGGed and Stumbled.
May 21st, 2009 at 4:29 pm
The only thing less funny than attempted comedy is someone dissecting it.
May 21st, 2009 at 4:26 pm
This article was crap. Carlos may not be funny…but this article was 10 levels BELOW.
Better luck next time…just dont count on it.
May 21st, 2009 at 4:21 pm
“I was on Cracked.com the other day. Check it out! It’s histactical!”
http://www.cracked.com
May 21st, 2009 at 4:15 pm
Isn’t there any way we can deport Carlos Mencia. Maybe we can ship him to Afgansistan. I bet al Queda would shoot themselves to avoid it.
But then I guess once everyone realizes how dangerous a Carlos Mencia is, countries will have to sign a non-proliferation treaty to keep hostile countries from developing their own Mencias. That much uncomedy could destroy the environment.
Not to mention that aliens that pick up the Mencia transmissions from space will blow up our planet in a fit of compassion.
May 21st, 2009 at 4:01 pm
That was horrible, I have a toothache and laughing that hard for that long really fucking hurt. D=
Great article! I can’t stand Mencia.
May 21st, 2009 at 3:55 pm
Lol, carlos mencia must be the biggest fucking retard in this entire planet.
May 21st, 2009 at 3:45 pm
This is, hands down, Seanbaby’s best article yet. That said, the rest unfortunately suck. With Seanbaby it seems the comedy either sucks or is awesome. This, however, is the first instance of a Seanbaby article not sucking. Keep up the awesome articles, Seanbaby, or you might lose me again (because I’m sure you totally care).
May 21st, 2009 at 3:45 pm
i don’t see the big deal.
May 21st, 2009 at 3:42 pm
haha that was great
Seanbaby is amazing addition to the cracked family
May 21st, 2009 at 3:34 pm
Seanbaby, you sir, win the interwebs.
May 21st, 2009 at 3:21 pm
I hate Mencia. He’s an unfunny, joke-stealing asshole. That being said. I can say the same thing about Seanbaby.
May 21st, 2009 at 3:17 pm
I’ve liked all your work so far, seanbaby, but this one had me howling.
May 21st, 2009 at 2:59 pm
Oh fuck i laughed so hard. This is one of *very* few blog posts that i laughed hard enough to get someone to ask what i was reading. The third chin thing sent me over the edge
May 21st, 2009 at 2:55 pm
Seanbaby you are unparalleled pro. I’m still laughing and having trouble typing this…
I like all the columnists on Cracked a lot but you have really taken the site by storm. Just plain fucking awesome - can’t wait for next week’s
May 21st, 2009 at 2:52 pm
Couldn’t finish this article. Seanbaby made the classic comedy mistake of thinking “This is so unfunny that its funny!” That never works out all that well even once, let alone 25 times in a row. Things that are funny because they’re unfunny are at the same comedic level as puns. I mean sure, they might be worth a polite chuckle, but you’re better than that.
May 21st, 2009 at 2:45 pm
I was never a cashier, but I did wait tables at a dildo restaurant once. Worst four years of my life. At least I got tipped well due to my above average Chewbacca impression.
May 21st, 2009 at 2:42 pm
@Technologic - Read the whole article, you’ll dig it.
May 21st, 2009 at 2:38 pm
For the people that don’t believe that justice and fairness can prevail in our universe, google ‘carlos mencia twitter’ and take a look at the results rank.
May 21st, 2009 at 2:35 pm
I lol’ed.
May 21st, 2009 at 2:33 pm
Oh god! Number 13 combines Carlos Mencia, Twitter AND Twilight! Worst combination ever. Like a cyanide-flavoured dogpoop cone….the cone is made of bees!
May 21st, 2009 at 2:26 pm
Fuck Carlos Mencia!!
I read like 1 paragraph of this article and I was done. Not that its bad but I felt that I would waste 5-7 minutes of my life reading about a douchebag. If Comedy Central had to have some hispanic comedian in the mainstream, y couldnt it have been Pablo Francisco? That guy is 500 time funnier then Carlos Mencia.
May 21st, 2009 at 2:26 pm
C’MON MAN HIS DEEK DON’T WORK!!!!!!!!
I like his latest Twit: “Onstage at 1:20 am at the comedy store in front of fourteen people. It reminds me of when I started doing comedy. I looooove it.” He’s oblivious to the fact that he can only draw around 15 people to his act now…
Amazing post. I demand more Seanbaby!
May 21st, 2009 at 2:24 pm
Ridiculous is spelled wrong…(rediculous) right before saying he’s thinking of writing a book. Oh god can it possibly get any better?
May 21st, 2009 at 2:17 pm
Oh my god, Twitter and this guy. I’m pretty sure there are no worse combinations. And I didn’t know he’s not actually Mexican; that really does add about twenty layers of douchebag to him.
However, Seanbaby is hilarious. It takes a lot of skill to turn a fuckball like Mencia into something genuinely funny.
May 21st, 2009 at 2:12 pm
Seanbaby, everything you write is fantastic. Don’t let the haters deter you; I laugh my ass off at everything you write every week.
This one might be my favorite thus far.
May 21st, 2009 at 2:02 pm
Carlos Mencia is the Mexican Dane Cook.
No, that is not a compliment.
May 21st, 2009 at 1:58 pm
Carlos Menica:
1. He’s a half german that was born as Ed Holnes
2. He steals jokes
3. He’s got no dick, man
May 21st, 2009 at 1:43 pm
Awesome article!
“Is this the go-to excuse for getting rid of him, or are people actually shooting themselves when they hear he’s coming?”
hehe
May 21st, 2009 at 1:40 pm
I giggled.
May 21st, 2009 at 1:22 pm
first time you made me laugh Seanbaby.
But you made me laugh alot.
May 21st, 2009 at 1:20 pm
Seanbaby, this article totally redeemed yourself. In case you were not aware, you needed redeeming.
This article ranks up there with anything video game or frivolous lawsuit related that you have written.
May 21st, 2009 at 1:09 pm
this is the first seanbaby iv found funny well done.
and thats without knowing who this mencia is as well
so…
hi carlos!
May 21st, 2009 at 1:00 pm
Good stuff, Seanbaby. I wish you and Crispin and Shane had continued putting out Broken Pixels- that was one of my favorite things ever made. Too bad that 1Up merger deal screwed us all over.
May 21st, 2009 at 12:56 pm
F*CK YOU MENCIA!
May 21st, 2009 at 12:56 pm
I’m really glad you made this article seanbaby. I was wondering what Carlos was up to. This year was practically carloless. And in its void was a handful of pilots that were worse, Better, or just plain different than the mind of mencia show. I gotta be honest. I hope the show comes back I had a lot of fun watching that show. Allegedly stolen jokes an all. I may have to visit Carlos twitter and see what he says about certain events.
May 21st, 2009 at 12:49 pm
Mencia Joke Construction: “i got AIDS from haveing sex with monkies. come by n say hi if your at the aids research center and ill buy you a shot.”
This made me laugh out loud.
Great article, Seanbaby
May 21st, 2009 at 12:47 pm
honestly, probably the funniest article i’ve ever read anywhere.
carlos mencia blows.
May 21st, 2009 at 12:44 pm
This probably ins’t a safe thing to say, but I think Carlos Mencia is a pretty cool guy. He isn’t really racist, seeing as he pokes fun of everyone in just about equal measure (mostly Latinos, but he’s one of them, so yeah). I enjoyed his show a whole lot and don’t really like it when they bash him like this. Be that as it may, I did LOL once or twice at this article.
May 21st, 2009 at 12:41 pm
This really made me laugh Seanbaby, your right at home here on Cracked.
May 21st, 2009 at 12:40 pm
I don’t like Carlos Mencia, but why does Seanbaby have the idea that every Twitter post Mencia puts up is intended as a joke? Take the Somalian pirate jokes one, that’s just an update to all Mencia’s friends about what he’s doing. What’s wrong with that? Or the CoD 4 one. Much as I hate the fact, Mencia does have some fans and maybe they would like to say they played CoD with Carlos Mencia. To me that’s just him being a cool guy, where there are actually celebrities who would intentionally keep these things a secret.
To me, Seanbaby hasn’t written anything good yet. He certainly doesn’t seem funny enough to be on Cracked after reading everything he’s posted so far. Seanbaby thinks up only one joke and then repeats it in different ways for an entire article, and I’ve come to expect better of this website.
May 21st, 2009 at 12:37 pm
Great article. I caught five minutes of Mencia’s stand-up special and can honestly say, without hyperbole, that it was the worst five minutes of my life.
“The instructor probably took one look at him and realized that his love life was trying to suck his own dick until his third chin choked him unconscious.”
Now THAT’s comedy.
May 21st, 2009 at 12:31 pm
C-
May 21st, 2009 at 12:25 pm
why didn’t you suck instead of fuck? Now your crap infesects humanity!
May 21st, 2009 at 12:24 pm
This article was about as funny as its subject.
May 21st, 2009 at 12:20 pm
Man, that was fantastically funny. I boomed out laughing at “i got AIDS from haveing sex with monkies. come by n say hi if your at the aids research center and ill buy you a shot”
May 21st, 2009 at 12:15 pm
HOLY COCK ICE SKATING
May 21st, 2009 at 12:13 pm
Seanbaby doesn’t sugar coat anything, does he? His article are so much different than most of the self-deprecating stuff on Cracked.
More, I say!!
May 21st, 2009 at 12:11 pm
C’mon everybody, He’s a nice guy. He bought me lunch at “”The Little Cafe on Ventura in Tarzana”
May 21st, 2009 at 12:02 pm
I think there are too many incredibly unfunny people who just love the fact Mencia can yell out spic and nigger without being murdered. They’re probably the same people who blast old NWA in their cars and act all hardcore, but turn it down and lock the door whenever a minority walks nearby.
I’m glad to see Sean back to doing what he does best, Hilariously berate the handicap. Godspeed sir Seanbaby.
May 21st, 2009 at 11:58 am
Once again, an awesome article.
And…why in blue hell does this idiot have a job? Whose Line Is It Anyway is off the air, but THIS guy is on? Christ.
May 21st, 2009 at 11:55 am
Good stuff! just check out___ MatchRich.com ___ where you can meet the wealthy singles,sexy beauties and even hot celebs . Find your sexy partner easier and more effective! What are you waiting for? Just go and hook up the sexy beauties now!
May 21st, 2009 at 11:53 am
I hate insulting people who aren’t insulting me first, but seriously: Seanbaby isn’t remotely funny. The only one I even sorta liked was the one about the best fight moments. And that one wasn’t really good, just not terrible. I literally read everything that gets posted on Cracked, but if Seanbaby writes another bad article, I’m just going to skip his pieces.
May 21st, 2009 at 11:49 am
infesects?
Hell Sean Baby should stay, I want to find out more about this infesects thing Pyrogen mentioned.
May 21st, 2009 at 11:46 am
im gonna infesect your mom.
May 21st, 2009 at 11:34 am
Good stuff! just check out___ MatchRich.c o m ___ where you can meet the wealthy singles,sexy beauties and even hot celebs . Find your sexy partner easier and more effective! What are you waiting for? Just go and hook up the sexy beauties now!
May 21st, 2009 at 11:33 am
Leave it to Seanbaby to write parodistic variations of another comedian’s jokes, and have the jokes be much much funnier than anything that comedian could write.
May 21st, 2009 at 11:32 am
How the fuck is Mencia employed?
May 21st, 2009 at 11:32 am
He should just commit suicide. Poor bastard.
May 21st, 2009 at 11:32 am
this is awesome. I just hate mencia, I hated him right away with those annoying commercials ruining my chapel show.
May 21st, 2009 at 11:28 am
I don’t particularly like Mencia, but he did a spoof on Kanye West on his show that was funny as hell. Gotta love the fact that he can drop the N-bomb at will.
May 21st, 2009 at 11:27 am
STFU pyrogen. This is the first column I’ve read in a while that had me laughing until I squirted a few tears. It was that part about Carlos’ third chin choking him unconscious while he tried to suck his own dick.
Seanbaby is… well, mean, but verruh funny. It’s sorta his job/place in the universe to criticize stuff that sucks. Apparently Mencia’s Twitter account is one of those things. I’m thinking of following it now.
Ironically Carlos will probably get a kick out of this column, so everybody in the comments say ‘hi’ while he Googles himself for the sixth time today.
Hi Carlos
May 21st, 2009 at 11:26 am
Great article, I’m still trying to figure out if Carlos Mencia might have a mild form of mental retardation. If he does I sorta feel bad…then again, I really don’t.
May 21st, 2009 at 11:25 am
Is there a tl;dr version?
May 21st, 2009 at 11:15 am
Holy hell! I didn’t even realize that was Seanbaby!
Started strong, but after a while it felt like you were picking on a retarded kid. (Which I guess you were.)
Don’t get me wrong, fuck Mencia! But I don’t think he was going for funny with all of those.
May 21st, 2009 at 11:08 am
Haha that was brilliant. Also he stole that aids/swineflu joke and ruined it, i really don’t doubt. I’ve heard it around.
May 21st, 2009 at 10:53 am
“This is the second time in two weeks that a shooting has prevented Carlos Mencia from performing. Is this the go-to excuse for getting rid of him, or are people actually shooting themselves when they hear he’s coming?”
Thats mean.
The aids joke was acceptably funny, just count it as a career highlight.
May 21st, 2009 at 10:52 am
Were the Twitter posts the unfunny bit or Seanbaby?
May 21st, 2009 at 10:51 am
dear editor of cracked,
“sean baby” sucks.
He is by far the worst writer in the history of cracked and i will always wonder why he got a job as a columnist in the first place. i suppose it was pity. seriously his crap infesects this website. Please fire him.
hopefully,
a fan of cracked.
May 21st, 2009 at 10:49 am
I’m Hispanic, I have roots from Mexico and Colombia. I have NEVER liked carlos mencia , and do acknowledge that the majority of his jokes are racist, and not something I can laugh at just because I am Hispanic. (I love George Lopez though!) Anyway, thanks for putting this chump on blast. He needs to look for another career.
May 21st, 2009 at 10:48 am
Dude whats more fun that hating on someone that everyone already hates? (dont answer that)
Still, i love this article. Im hoping Cracked finds a way to send this link to Mencia himself.
I would love to read an Interview that they do with Carlos, just like the one they did with the Jonas Brothers.
May 21st, 2009 at 10:45 am
my boyfriend: Carlos Mencia just says what everyone else is thinking! That’s why you don’t like him.
me (with bullet pointed to my brain): No. Carlos Mencia is just racist. Are you implying that everyone else is racist too?
me boyfriend: No. That’s not even what he says.
me: I will NOT watch Mind of Mencia to let you prove your point.
Carlos Mencia is so terrible, the thought of him actually makes me want to shove crap in my ears to eliminate the risk of ever hearing him again.
May 21st, 2009 at 10:35 am
I almost feel sorry for him toward the end, but he’s just so delusional…it’s like he won’t allow himself to realize nobody wants him around anymore. However, it made for a hilarious article so it’s a win! Great work, SB.
May 21st, 2009 at 10:32 am
Cracked is the reason I make no friends in spare class. I just sit here and laugh hysterically to myself.
And goddamn, I love it! Thanks for another hystatical article.
May 21st, 2009 at 10:24 am
Another Mencia fan comes to the rescue with the same flawless grammar and cotent well-formed opinions of his hero.
May 21st, 2009 at 10:23 am
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May 21st, 2009 at 10:23 am
I’m sorry, but ragging on Carlos Mencia these days is so passe. It’s like ragging on Chris Kataan’s movie career; we know it sucks, it’s common knowledge, no need to beat a dead horse.
May 21st, 2009 at 10:22 am
Might as well have listened to Carlos himself. This article was equally unfunny.
May 21st, 2009 at 10:15 am
Stop Carlos Mencia!
May 21st, 2009 at 10:12 am
Amazing. I laughed out loud. Brilliant.
Thank you for crucifying this racist ass whose 15 minutes were over five years ago.
May 21st, 2009 at 10:03 am
You Spoilers on here. Your judgements… If you weren’t so busy living in whoring Mom’s trailer in that welfare park, maybe you’d step outside of your shell and write something better than was presented here or FREE. If not… shut your cocksucker and move along little in-bred doggies. Oh… what’s that?! Your Mom is fucking another John in the shower because rent is almost due… QUICK ROBIN… TO YOUR PEEPHOLE!!! Fucking losers.
May 21st, 2009 at 10:02 am
Another brilliant article. You’ve always been funny but your cracked articles still manage to get better and better each time. I hate twitter. I hate Mencia. Combining them and making them hilarious is a stroke of brilliance.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:59 am
I always thought your articles kinda sucked. Now I know they do. Why did they even hire you?
May 21st, 2009 at 9:57 am
This was the funniest thing I’ve read in weeks. I’m crying laughing so hard!
May 21st, 2009 at 9:52 am
i almost fell asleep reading that crap. you were getting good recently. this one is the fail.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:51 am
finally!
A seanbaby article worth reading the whole way through!
I actually laughed out loud.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:50 am
I don’t know that Mencia guy too well, but this article rocks !
May 21st, 2009 at 9:43 am
[...] I’m still not convinced if these posts are real or not, but judging from how unfunny they are, I would have to believe they are. Go here to read. [...]
May 21st, 2009 at 9:39 am
I couldn’t even laugh…I’d be embarrassed for him if he wasn’t such a jackass.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:37 am
@LOL
Sign me up…I’m going to be finding his games non stop…hope he plays hardcore so I can kill him even if he is on my team.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:35 am
I’m pretty sure there isn’t a single paragraph in this entire article that isn’t awesome. Every joke wins.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:33 am
Who picked this illegal alien from the orchards?! http://neilsnotes.com/index.php?page=13&catid=10&sku=ENGL-CD00339
May 21st, 2009 at 9:32 am
I bet Carlos is good at the sex
May 21st, 2009 at 9:27 am
If I could kick Carlos Mencia in the balls and then rip his tongue out, I would.
Fine, I’d leave his tongue but force him to sit in a room filled with mirrors and speakers blasting his own stupid stand up routine back at him in a devilish voice.
But seriously, I loathe this man’s existence and that show they gave him? FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. The people in his own audience don’t laugh. Hey, hello, when you start paying people to laugh, you’re screwed. He’s getting there.
But great article, forwarding this onto everyone I know who likes this dick.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:26 am
Lates from Mencia:
“Onstage at 1:20 am at the comedy store in front of fourteen people. It reminds me of when I started doing comedy. I looooove it.
about 9 hours ago from Tweetier”
You suck HAHAHA!
May 21st, 2009 at 9:22 am
How about waiting until Mencia is actually at the place he is going and then start the shooting. But please aim for his head!
May 21st, 2009 at 9:21 am
“This is the second time in two weeks that a shooting has prevented Carlos Mencia from performing. Is this the go-to excuse for getting rid of him, or are people actually shooting themselves when they hear he’s coming?”
What a fantastic quote XD
May 21st, 2009 at 9:19 am
Best article I’ve ever read on cracked.com.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:19 am
Good job Seanbaby! Good to see you’re still just as funny as ever. You had me worried with your first few articles here on cracked, but this is by far the best one!
made me laugh real hard
May 21st, 2009 at 9:17 am
Not bad, my dislike of Carlos Mencia probably made it better. I’m terrible for saying so but the funniest to me was his canceled appearances.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:12 am
I want to know one thing… How the Hell does Carlos Mencia have a Show?… Actually that brings more questions to mind… How the hell does he have an audience at his stand-up shows? and how the hell did he even get remotely popular in the first place? People Though Dane Cook was bad… at least he has SOME original jokes…. Mencia on the other hand has to be a robot built by TV executives that are in their late 60’s trying to find a way to be hip and funny… THROUGH RACISM and terrible jokes…. how are some people who are actually funny get shafted while this idiot who doesn’t even know his nationality get popular enough for his own show? It’s Mind Boggling!
May 21st, 2009 at 9:08 am
Wait, how could Carlos Mencia have a Twitter page? I thought Kanye West killed him. Are you saying South Park lied to me?
Oh my God, does this mean Barack Obama and John McCain really AREN’T secretly jewel thieves?
May 21st, 2009 at 9:06 am
and also, joe rogan isnt all that much funnier than mencia, blah blah blah i take drugs, blah blah blah cage fighting, blah blah carlos mencia sucks.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:05 am
Great work. Mencia is pompous and not funny.
May 21st, 2009 at 9:02 am
“and that is how the whole aritcle goes blah,blah,ha,gag,haha
usually wouldnt care, but you know ur bashing some1, and even though he is a shit stand up comedian, try to make 3/4 funny at least”
hey blah, pull mencia’s dick out of your mouth for a second so you dont have honduran balls blocking your view from a hilarious article.
May 21st, 2009 at 8:44 am
“The instructor probably took one look at him and realized that his love life was trying to suck his own dick until his third chin choked him unconscious. So yes, this incredible yoga thing you discovered is going to be great for that.”
had me rofling for minutes
May 21st, 2009 at 8:42 am
I’m a big joe rogan fan (i’m assuming you know that he bashed mencia on stage) so i really dont care for mencia, but it sounds like you were just reaching on half of this stuff, just tring to pull mencia haters to read it, and I did.
manny comment-ok
sp-ok
heaven-funny
xbox-flat line
cafe-fucking great
and that is how the whole aritcle goes blah,blah,ha,gag,haha
usually wouldnt care, but you know ur bashing some1, and even though he is a shit stand up comedian, try to make 3/4 funny at least
May 21st, 2009 at 8:41 am
“trying to suck his own dick till his third chin choked him unconscious”, You Sir are a comedy genius. I laughed so hard ,I am actually crying, pure gold. It’s like his sentinent third chin is so ashamed , its trying to save us from the horror it’s attached to. Pure comedy gold, thank you, thank you.
May 21st, 2009 at 8:41 am
Funniest thing I’ve ever read on this site.
Bravo, seanbaby.
May 21st, 2009 at 8:33 am
If you go on Twitter now and seatch ‘Mencia’ the first three pages are all people linking this article. Well done.
May 21st, 2009 at 8:30 am
just google
Oriol’s POZ Blog masks vs condoms
it made the rounds long before he posted it
May 21st, 2009 at 8:29 am
Better than banging a hot chick.
May 21st, 2009 at 8:29 am
Carlos did not think of that condom joke either i got in in a txt befor it was on his twitter so i guess he stole that to
May 21st, 2009 at 8:25 am
He stole the aids mask joke man
May 21st, 2009 at 8:21 am
fuck you boxy
May 21st, 2009 at 8:19 am
Man, fuck encyclopedia dramatica, it’s written by a bunch of losers who post cock pictures and jerk off to hentai, you actually rely on their opinions for anything?
As for Seanbaby, yep, you’re still the man.
May 21st, 2009 at 8:17 am
“Is this the go-to excuse for getting rid of him, or are people actually shooting themselves when they hear he’s coming?” lolled sooooo hard
May 21st, 2009 at 8:16 am
i fucking hate stupid comedians
Seanbaby, congratulations, you’re not stupid
May 21st, 2009 at 8:15 am
Wow. I really need to check out this George Lopez guy. He sounds like significantly less of a tool.
May 21st, 2009 at 8:13 am
AYI AYI AYI i was featured on kracked and it was sooooo funnie!!!!! i cant stop laffing!!!!
May 21st, 2009 at 8:13 am
“In order for this joke to work, Carlos is taking for granted that we already know something about Mexicans having sex with pigs. Is that a real stereotype?”
when he says “whats next donkey flu” he is talking about the famous donkey-girl shows that go on in mexico, its a shit joke but i dont know why you didnt pick up on it.
May 21st, 2009 at 8:08 am
Holy shit, did someone actually just manage to make Carlos Mencia funny?
NOW I’ve seen everything.
May 21st, 2009 at 8:07 am
agreed with St Banana, excellent article of Mencia bashing!
May 21st, 2009 at 8:06 am
Rad article!
Carlos translation:”I didn’t think so but I really enjoyed it”
WTF?
May 21st, 2009 at 8:06 am
Carlos Mencia’s Twitter - 25 Posts Too Unfunny to be Stolen | Cracked…
When Carlos Mencia got a Twitter account, I knew it was a great opportunity to see how one of our finest comedic minds works. He’s the Bad Boy of Comedy! Except only he himself called himself that and it was only to set up a joke about how that’s a…
May 21st, 2009 at 8:04 am
shit man awesome
May 21st, 2009 at 8:03 am
This. Was. FANTASTIC.
Seanbaby, you’ve been doing great at picking topics for the last little while. Keep it up.
May 21st, 2009 at 8:01 am
ugh. he went ice skating in my city. ugh.
May 21st, 2009 at 7:59 am
Absolutely brilliant! Fuck Carlos right in the goat-ass!
…and ALA5150, that was funny, “you know what you must do” shoot yourself, but shoot Carlos first, ok?
May 21st, 2009 at 7:47 am
I can’t believe I said “on” instead of “own” after just proclaiming my hatred of typos?
May 21st, 2009 at 7:47 am
I can’t stand typos. I can’t stand Mencia. I on a gun. What I must do now is apparent.
May 21st, 2009 at 7:44 am
lol, i love hating Mecncia
May 21st, 2009 at 7:38 am
Man, I don’t know what the fuck encyclopedia dramatica was talking about dude, you’re hilarious. That shit about heaven was teh funniest.
May 21st, 2009 at 7:30 am
@ colin_in_sick: OHHHH Lawdy - that Fred Doist comment had me in stitches! Like a chainsaw (what)!
May 21st, 2009 at 7:29 am
Good lord, I’ve never read something so funny that’s dissing Carlos. I was lol’ing the whole time, good one Seanbaby
May 21st, 2009 at 7:24 am
I never would have thought that anything involving Carlos Mencia would actually make me laugh. Never say never. Oooh.
May 21st, 2009 at 7:21 am
not bad keep it up
May 21st, 2009 at 7:18 am
Hillarious, your a fantastic writter, keep it rollin buddy
May 21st, 2009 at 7:18 am
I’ve never seen this guy. Now I don’t want to. Thank you, Cracked, for saving me from him!!!
May 21st, 2009 at 7:14 am
The same people that think Carlos is funny probably have also made Will Ferrel a star. Both stink worse than a turd in the Arizona desert.
May 21st, 2009 at 7:14 am
chill boxy
May 21st, 2009 at 7:13 am
Man, I wish I could care about who is this douchebag… but I don’t.
In any case, good article, and now I know I have to avoid him like the plage.
Thanks, Cracked!
May 21st, 2009 at 7:11 am
i love the idea that on hearing news of Carlos Mencia coming to town people just start indiscriminately shooting eachother
May 21st, 2009 at 7:10 am
The joke about people shooting themselves because of Mencia made me laugh so hard. You rock Seanbaby!
May 21st, 2009 at 7:10 am
Carlos Mencia is the Fred Durst of comedy.
May 21st, 2009 at 7:01 am
That was funny as fuck. Loved the joke deconstruction, both actually made me laugh, but that’s because I am a moron.
May 21st, 2009 at 7:01 am
That was hysterical. I saw the words Mencia and Twitter and already had a smile on my face. seanbaby you have yet to let me down.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:58 am
I’m going to fucking hunt that no good prick down in COD4 kill him with ever ounce of my soul and T-bag his twat face. Killing Mencia over and over again and yelling dee duhDEE! is going to make me so happy.. THANK YOU THANK YOU!!
May 21st, 2009 at 6:54 am
Seanbaby is a solid writer who brings in many many lawls. Great addition to the cracked team. Great article.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:49 am
So, Sean, tell us how you *really* feel about Mencia. Fan? Not a fan?
May 21st, 2009 at 6:43 am
wow i never thought an article could combine my hatred of twitter and carlos mencia. excellent job your posts keep gettin funnier
May 21st, 2009 at 6:41 am
Mencia getting cancelled twice for shootings had me lolin’.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:41 am
While some holdouts inexplicably remain, I think it’s increasingly evident to anyone with a fucking brain that Seanbaby the greatest addition to a group since the Green Ranger. No one can turn a phrase like him.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:39 am
this asshole once stole a milkshake of mine. fuck him and his twitter account
May 21st, 2009 at 6:36 am
Mencia is nothing. In Australia we suffer from a thing called Rove.
Check it out. It’s like anti-funny, with even less funny things revolving around it…
May 21st, 2009 at 6:35 am
carlos mencia is a racist. just like all black people.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:34 am
Shit. Just knowing that Mencia is “do hooked on” Heroes that “it’s rediculous” just totally fucking ruined Heroes for me. And I actually liked the show, dammit.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:30 am
God….that’s just horrible horrible pain.
If you were offered a choice between listening to/watching this ‘comedian’ and having a catheter put in your uethra, you’d be grabbing the needle out of the nurse’s hand and ramming it in your goddamn self.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:30 am
Fucking Superb
May 21st, 2009 at 6:27 am
Getting better every article.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:25 am
Ya know, I’ve hated everything you’ve put on Cracked up until this
topic.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:23 am
I just wet myself. Thank you Seanbaby - that was the funniest thing I’ve read in weeks.
I’m now in a state of confusion about Mencia. I want to send him a dual message from the universe telling him that it’s ok, that there are people who care for him, and that he doesn’t have to be so lonely - but also saying that he should lock himself in a closet and shut his fucking mouth.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:23 am
Absolutely hilarious. Perfect.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:23 am
first of all, brent, you are a Idiot, this was fucking funny as shit. Second of all, poop.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:18 am
Hahaha, I really enjoyed this one.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:14 am
Not-actually-very-funny comedian with a distorted and coloured view of the world who thinks his opinion is smarter and more meaningful than that of anyone else’s in the room? Sounds like most of humanity then. Which just goes to show, Carlos Mencia is an exceedingly poor comedian who somehow got a gig, on the level of an everyday guy who tries exceedingly hard to be observational and hilarious when he’s essentially reworking the ‘airline peanut’ set-up. You’d laugh at Carlos if you’re the type who laughs desperately at every nuance of your friend’s jokes, i.e exceedingly low standards of humour.
Oh yes, and someone should tell Carlos, parodying and being snarky about your race to be self-deprecating works on the level of you and the rest of your friends, as an opinion made public it just makes you racist, patronising and look stupid and self-disrespectful.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:14 am
Carlos Mencia is so not funny I can’t even describe it. It was obvious when his show came on that Comedy Central was trying to capitalize on the success of Chappelle’s Show by trying another angle (or another race basically). Good god was it horrible. The real question is how long would that show have stayed on had Chappelle not preceded it?
Horrific side note: I actually met someone once that thought Mencia was hilarious. He was a cousin of my then girlfriend, and the worst part was he quoted Mencia’s material on average of once every 1/2 hour. Oh and we were camping so we had no choice but to be subjected to it. I almost blacked out a few times.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:11 am
@ brent; eh
I see this article is already doing the invaluable service of dividing Cracked readers between people who like Carlos Mencia and people who can read.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:11 am
This might rival the original Joe Rogan video as the quintessential Carlos Mencia ball-stomping
May 21st, 2009 at 6:10 am
“his love life was trying to suck his own dick until his third chin choked him unconscious”
Damn you, seanbaby, you made me pee myself a little
May 21st, 2009 at 6:10 am
Why is he famous?
WHY IS HE FAMOUS?!
Hilarious post, man.
May 21st, 2009 at 6:05 am
If he makes any money at all, it’s an insult to, well, everything everywhere. He’s so frakked up that I feel bad after reading his twitters…
May 21st, 2009 at 6:02 am
Oh, I had forgotten about this guy and what a ferocious cuntbag he is, at least on tv.
May 21st, 2009 at 5:57 am
First of all … not really funny.
This was crap compared to the usual Cracked offering.
But what I really want to rant on:
The woman wearing a mask was a moron.
And his point about the Masks/Condoms was spot on.
A “media frenzy” is no excuse for all of these mindless idiots running around. .
So … as much as he sucks - and boy does he suck … the only thing I gather from this article is that Mencia at least has more brains than the dim witted author of this garbage.
May 21st, 2009 at 5:54 am
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May 21st, 2009 at 5:54 am
Geez… I don’t know if should get angry with Carlos… or… just feel pity for him.
I mean… I can picture him sitting on a small dinner with two lunches staring everyone who gets in with a simpleton and full-o-hope dumb smile. (then eating the second lunch minutes later… crying)
May 21st, 2009 at 5:53 am
This article was as funny as Mencia is not. Well done.
May 21st, 2009 at 5:53 am
[...] If you know me, you would know that I DESPISE Carlos Mencia. So it was a trea to to find the following blog entry on cracked.com, from where I took the following screen [...]
May 21st, 2009 at 5:52 am
@ eh, way to go bud, you sure know how to sound smart. that point is as relvant as carlos mencia’s punchlines.
May 21st, 2009 at 5:43 am
He still makes more money than you.
May 21st, 2009 at 5:09 am
How, just how, could anything possibly be that messed up? Twilight. Pig fucking. Free lunch. Yoga classes. Did I mention the pig fucking?
May 21st, 2009 at 5:06 am
I don’t know who this Carlos Mencia is but Seanbaby sure succeeded at making me hate him.
Or maybe it’s just his Tweets are that bad. Yes, Carlos, go ahead and get swine flu. Maybe we can save our bullet money.
May 21st, 2009 at 5:04 am
Reading this has made me SO glad that I never bothered to watch that douche’s show. Wow, I never realized how lame he was.
Thank you for that PSA, Seanbaby!
May 21st, 2009 at 4:52 am
Wow, Seanbaby. This was definitely your funniest article on Cracked yet!
May 21st, 2009 at 4:49 am
I have to be honest when I say your first few posts made me wonder why the hell you were hired by Cracked, but lately you’ve been the best columnist. Congrats and keep up the good work.
May 21st, 2009 at 4:24 am
Incredible.
May 21st, 2009 at 3:45 am
Good times
May 21st, 2009 at 3:44 am
Magnificent
May 21st, 2009 at 3:37 am
“This is the second time in two weeks that a shooting has prevented Carlos Mencia from performing. Is this the go-to excuse for getting rid of him, or are people actually shooting themselves when they hear he’s coming?”
I take back what I said about your previous article and the one before that ect. THAT was the funniest article I’ve ever read.
May 21st, 2009 at 3:13 am
Seanbaby, you rock!