Providing new evidence for the theory that the American entertainment complex will never produce another original idea again, NBC has once more reanimated the putrid corpse of one of your cherished childhood memories and will proudly display this unholy monstrosity to the world this February under the bastard name of “Knight Rider.”
The movie-and-possibly-series is going to star a bunch of young hotties with fake boobs and chiseled abs who will no doubt bring an “extreme” edge to the show, in order to appeal to the 18-29 year-old braniacs who read magazines like Maxim and Leathertits and drink that Coke with nicotine in it or whatever which the show’s advertisers are so desperate to attract.
Also joining the (extreme) fun will be a middle-aged sometime-actor named David Hasselhoff, who I’ve never heard of but who apparently achieved minor internet celebrity this year due to an entertaining video of the shirtless man engaged in a sensuous embrace with a chicken sandwich, lovingly filmed by his adoring daughter.
But the real stars of the show are bound to be the cars:
The three cars to be employed in the series include the KITT Hero—a Ford Mustang Shelby GT500KR that is playing the part of the everyday Hero car with 540 horsepower; the KITT Attack—a super high-speed version of the Ford Mustang Shelby GT500KR Hero car that transforms into Attack mode with the help of air-ride technology and specialized body parts—and a KITT Remote, which is a driverless Ford Mustang Shelby GT500KR version of the Hero vehicle.
… all of which will be available on eBay shortly after the show’s cancellation after three episodes (and replacement with “Law & Order: Spoiled Cheese Unit”).
So for the right price, you’ll then be able to say, “KITT, go pick up my stupid family,” and the car will happily drive out of a truck’s butt and take over all your most hated chores while you slowly grow deeper into the folds of your couch and await the premiere of “Airwolf 2008.”
This entry was posted on Thursday, December 13th, 2007 at 8:00 am and is filed under Cars, David Hasselhoff, TV. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
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November 12th, 2009 at 10:49 am
Useful information there
November 12th, 2009 at 10:06 am
Useful information there
November 12th, 2009 at 9:57 am
Thanks, some interesting stuff to read here. But i’m having some problems using Opera Browser. Is it only me?
November 11th, 2009 at 6:20 pm
This reminds me of something that my sister always said…
But it is totally inappropriate right this moment…
November 4th, 2009 at 6:42 am
Heya. sweet post. Can u point me how to put ur site in to my RSS reader?? plz :D?? BB from Norway
October 30th, 2009 at 6:37 am
This is great information, I have read something similar before.
October 14th, 2009 at 10:24 pm
I’ll check this out again.
September 6th, 2009 at 6:47 pm
Hi, i hope you don’t mind me posting here but i tried to subscribe to your RSS and it said “parse error, unexpected T_STRING on line 26
August 7th, 2009 at 6:48 am
Howdy, I found your website a little while ago and have read all the posts slowly. I thought should post my firstcomment. Not really sure what to write but here goes. Interesting site. Will call back in a while to hear more of what youd like to offer.
July 27th, 2009 at 1:17 am
You made some good points there,I did a search on the topic and found most people will agree with your blog.
July 24th, 2009 at 9:19 pm
This is a very informative post! Keep up the good work.
July 2nd, 2009 at 4:53 am
Hi there, I found your blog via Google while searching for first aid for a heart attack and your post looks very interesting for me.
May 26th, 2009 at 4:56 pm
Hey very nice blog!! Man .. Beautiful .. Amazing .. I will bookmark your blog and take the feeds also…
May 11th, 2009 at 10:00 pm
Hello, I found your blog in a new directory of blogs. I dont know how your blog came up, must have been a typo. Your blog looks good. Have a nice day.
May 2nd, 2009 at 10:14 pm
Hey very nice blog Beautiful Amazing I will bookmark your blog and take the feeds also…
April 10th, 2009 at 3:46 pm
There is obviously a lot to know about this. I think you made some good points in Features also.
March 16th, 2009 at 1:01 am
I tried an acai bowl yesterday and oh my GOODness it was soo yummy!
March 7th, 2009 at 3:23 pm
Hello. Great job. This is a great post. Thanks!
March 4th, 2009 at 8:33 pm
Hello Guru, what entice you to post an article. This article was extremely interesting, especially since I was searching for thoughts on this subject last night.
March 4th, 2009 at 8:28 pm
Hello. Great job. I did not expect this on a Wednesday. This is a great story. Thanks!
August 18th, 2008 at 5:54 pm
Acai Berry Diet…
Acai Berry Diet…
March 9th, 2008 at 7:58 am
I’d prefer reading in my native language, because my knowledge of your languange is no so well. But it was interesting! Look for some my links:
March 2nd, 2008 at 3:55 pm
David, drink yourself to death buddy…you’re done. So done. Stick a fork in yourself you’re so done. With what little shred of dignity you don’t even have left anymore… end it Bro. Drink youself to death. Don’t show up on TV anymore. Don’t do embarassing stunts just to get camera time to try and re-capture your glory years… you’re done! Go away…please, for the love of God…go away!
‘Don’t hassle the hof!’ How about: ‘Fuck off and die’ already you embarassing piece of human trash! I’d take a crack at your daughter though…don’t get me wrong.
http://www.NeilsNotes.com
December 15th, 2007 at 5:42 pm
Hasselhoff is the manliness man alive.
December 13th, 2007 at 11:39 pm
Wait, wait, wait…
There’s a magazine called Leathertits? Please tell me it features nude senior citizens, because that would make me cry tears of joy (during shameful masturbation).
December 13th, 2007 at 9:28 pm
Solomon*
December 13th, 2007 at 7:28 pm
Or is it Solomon? Or Salomon? Eh, I’m too lazy and impious to look it up.
December 13th, 2007 at 7:27 pm
*gasp* That kind of changes everything. Although did you see the Brothers Soloman?
December 13th, 2007 at 5:17 pm
But…Will Arnett is the voice of KITT. Will Arnett!
December 13th, 2007 at 3:02 pm
“Just say no” to quoting Family Guy, folks. Your self-respect will thank you later.
December 13th, 2007 at 2:46 pm
Mmmm, I find it to be rather shallow and pedantic.
December 13th, 2007 at 1:05 pm
Mmm, that’s some funny cynicism. I lol’d at the last paragraph.
December 13th, 2007 at 11:37 am
“AIRWOLF 2008″?!?!? REALLY?!? THAT WOLD BE AWSOME!!!!!!!!!!!
December 13th, 2007 at 8:45 am
This isn’t the first time they’ve tried this, complete with mega-ad-placement from Ford. Back in the late 90’s there was Knight Rider 2000, a show with 5 KITT cars (all Fords, one was actually a pickup truck), a bunch of no-name actors, and most importantly NO Michael Knight, Bonnie, or Devon. It was a 30-minute Ford commercial basically. Surprisingly, it didn’t last long.
Fuck TV. Maybe if the writers stayed on strike forever, TV would just collapse under its own retardedness.