Cracked Columnists
5 Baffling Real Internet Searches For Financial Advice
In the superior hemisphere it's nearly spring again, and as Americans celebrate by shedding their jackets or falling in love in parks, the IRS is beginning its gradual warm up and stretching routine in preparation for some unparalleled wallet raping.
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- By Soren Bowie
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0 4 More Satirists Attacked By People Who Missed The Point
Four more satirists who had to take crap from people who quite simply missed the point.
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- By Gladstone
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5 More Great Book Ideas 'The Man' Is Too Afraid to Publish
I am still determined to get several books published, so that I may enrich the world with my knowledge, and impress chicks who sell books enough to inspire them to have sex with me.
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- By Daniel O'Brien
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The Worst Comedy On TV (Explained to Deaf People)
I was in the bar the other morning and noticed that the closed captions for comedy shows either don't match the original script or leave out important details to a joke. For example, {{muttering}} is an inadequate way to describe the late Estelle Getty clearing her throat to secretly call the dead Rue McLanahan a slut.
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- By Seanbaby
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If The State Of The Union Addressed Real Issues
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- By Cody Johnston
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An Interview With Caps Lock: The Most Misunderstood Key
A few weeks ago Google unveiled a prototype of a new Chrome based netbook to the world. Truly a computer for the Internet age, several interesting design choices were made with this netbook, including the decision to remove the Caps Lock key.
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- By Chris Bucholz
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5 Products that Will Be Exposed as B.S. in 2011
No one is willing to believe a product doesn't work until science discredits it, and science is already so busy with cancer and hoverboards.
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- By Soren Bowie
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4 Products That Only Exist in Movies
If we had these products, movies would finally make sense. You're welcome, movies.
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- By Daniel O'Brien
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When Cartoons Pander To Everyone: Jedinja Zamvirebot
My prediction for the next big fad is 'all of them, combined.'
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- By Cody Johnston
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If Awesome Lunatics Ran Airlines
There's no security check point. If it didn't kill you on the drive to the airport, we figure it probably won't kill you on the plane either.
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- By Seanbaby
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Secondhand Nightmares: 10 Horrifying Thrift Store Finds
Thrift stores are a godsend for the poor and the tragically hip alike: You can find nearly anything there, and for dirt cheap, too! Even horror. Especially horror.
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- By Robert Brockway
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50 Cent Attempts to Scam You On Twitter
Yeah, that was a bigger job than we thought. You gots to owe me $8200. Don't make me shoot U. You woudn't like me when I shoot you.
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- By Chris Bucholz
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Dear Gwyneth Paltrow: Understanding Why Everyone Hates You
You have taken some heat lately from the press for your website, for your spontaneous music career, and for just generally being you. I imagine your self-confidence is a little shaken and that you would gladly wish it all away, if only you knew how wishing for things worked.
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- By Soren Bowie
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The iPhone Service Provider Debate Is Getting Weird
>Earlier this week it was announced that, for the first time ever, the iPhone would be supported by a network other than AT&T - specifically Verizon.
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- By Gladstone
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A Series of Dispatches From Jersey Shore's New Intern
As you requested, I purchased enough alcohol to murder a generation of grizzly bears, and these people finished every last drop of it. If you still want to keep the cast consistently inebriated for the rest of the season, I will need either an increased budget or to wake up from this nightmare.
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- By Daniel O'Brien
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