Well, I don't know about you, but this is definitely the image that pops into my head when I think of the word "samurai." Why, I had to rub my eyes and do a double-take just to make sure that I wasn't looking at a screenshot of Toshiro Mifune from one of Akira Kurosawa's movies! That's how authentic to the tradition of the samurai this costume is!
On the plus side, this costume is probably the closest we have on the list to being actually frightening, but I'm not sure if the Super Gross Toenail is included with the costume or sold as an accessory or what:
Look, I try not to go after the models on costume sites because their lives clearly didn't turn out as they'd hoped, but seriously, dude. Get that checked out by a podiatrist. That shit is worrisome.
I get that not everyone shares my opinion that Halloween should be for scary costumes only, but I will never in a million years understand the desire that people seem to have to dress up as food. This is apparently a thing, though, and costume retailers are more than willing to oblige.
I like to imagine that the meeting that resulted in this costume involved a hotshot young costume designer walking in with the Taco Suit as a follow-up to last year's smash hit, Pizza Slice, only to have his chief rival at RacistCostumeCorp lean onto his desk with a smirk and say, "Well, how are they going to know it's Mexican food if it doesn't have ... a sombrero?"
Really, guys. You do not need to add additional stereotypes to make sure that we get it. The concept of a taco is pretty easy to understand, and just by throwing the hat on there, you've pretty much ruined it. Now there's no way that I can see this as anything but racist. I mean, maybe if it was on a dog or something.
#2. "Taco Dog"
Nope. Just looks like that pug is hella racist.
#1. "Sexy Chinese Geisha"
Finally, we have the "Sexy Chinese Geisha." Because, you know, geisha are definitely something that is from China, and not, say, another Asian country that is culturally distinct that you could find out in literally less than two seconds just by typing the word "geisha" into a computer. Personally, I think it looks more like an Old West Saloon Girl anyway, but, well, that's why I'm writing jokes and not rolling on a mountain of hundred-dollar bills earned with sexy, sexy racism.
The best (well, "best") part of this one, though, isn't the costume itself, or even the name. It's the official product description that accompanied it, letting potential customers know that it was a great costume for "traditional Japanese and oriental women."
Come on, costume sites. Make up your mind: Is it for Chinese geisha or Japanese Oriental women? I'm pretty sure there's a difference.
Be sure to check out 5 Classic Horror Movies (If They Had a $1 Budget) and vote for your favorite.