8 Letters from the Elementary School Where I Guest Lectured
Learn How to Win a Fight Against 20 Children. Or for more of Soren's selflessness check out his guide to Using Charity to Help The Third World (Worship You as a God).
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I lost it at "I'm sorry I walked in when you and Mrs. Wright were studying."
ReplyI died. Very funny.
ReplyPs..... all the kids have the same writing.......
You can touch me any time Soren ;)
Replyawesome Soren!!!
Reply"...feeling as though I touched them."
ReplySoren... This just comes off as creepy. You don't have to touch kids. You could get any woman or man on Cracked.
that was possibly the greatest thing ive ever seen. and ive seen a cow get hit by a car in the interstate. nobody died so its cool
Reply...was the cow okay??
He said nobody dies so the cow must have been bo-fine....
cellar door on the blackboard = donnie darko reference?
ReplyI want that principal.
ReplyHa! That last one must be from here in Atlanta. But seriously, props for the Iliad reference! (Achilles fighting a river. Unless you made that up just to be awesome. In which case, you should probably read the Iliad. It's action-packed!)
ReplyYou know what I hate more than anything? A self promoter.
ReplyYa know what I hate more than anything? Assholes whole can't understand sarcasm. Go f**k a meat grinder.
Yeah, go grind a meat f****r
Hmm, this only serves to prove my previous assumption that Soren is a god.
ReplyThe second-last letter was disturbingly similar to a message a got from a girl.
Reply Hide All See All 4 Repliesyour right hand does not count as a girl.
f*****g LOL!!!!
Exceptional wit, sir!
What about his left hand?
Someone please high five this guy
ReplyCELLAR DOOR
ReplyLMAO f*****g classic. Soren wins again (as usual).
ReplyAnyone else notice how the first picture had Native Americans designed with red construction paper? Or how the alphabet is missing E and F in the picture of Soren boning Ms. Meyer?
ReplyCome on, man. They're just kids.
this is beautiful.
ReplyOooh! Soren is a badass with the kids!
ReplyDecades from now, Liberal Arts schools across the world will tell tales of the great Bowie, and his works will replace The Iliad on the great totem pole of required reading.
ReplyOf course it will, Soren carved said totem pole. It was only a matter of time!
You know, we really need to invent sarcasm tags. They'll do the same thing as italics, only you'll denote them with "srcsm".
Reply Hide All See All 3 RepliesNo, we don't. The beauty of sarcasm is that it doesn't have to be obvious.
I see what you did there.
^