When anything is possible, humanity has chosen to lick its elbows.
There are thousands of bewildering questions poured into search engines every day, which is a scary prospect both because the Internet is a breeding ground for misinformation and because the majority of those searches are for medical advice. What's more, advertisers buy page real-estate around those searches, hoping to cash in on the naivetÃ© and desperation of the sickly instead of offering them the help they're hunting.
Ignorance deserves better.
It deserves the counsel of someone who has experienced nearly every survivable ailment first hand, it deserves someone who won't judge for petty misunderstanding of human anatomy, it deserves someone who came really close to graduating from that free online medical course he took last spring. My Uncle Frank has devoted himself to doling out honest answers and candid advice for the people who are in critical need of help but unwilling to put on pants to go get it. The following are completely real questions people have asked the Internet, and the answers they wholly deserve.