5 Romantic Comedy Gestures That Would Get You Slapped

#2. Grand Gestures of 'Love'

20th Century Fox

This is basically a requirement of any romantic comedy: The Grand Gesture of Love. It can be anything from running to stop someone at an airport, to some sort of public performance or display of affection to, yes, holding a boombox over your head.

Lloyd Dobler should be slapped or arrested. I'm sorry. I love him too and was charmed by him, but dude is a stalker and goes too far. Does the mere mention of "In Your Eyes" make me cry because of Lloyd? Of course! I'm not a robot! But if I'm actually Diane Court, I'm terrified. I'm running away. I'm mad at you for playing Peter Gabriel at full volume and standing silently in my lawn in a trenchcoat!

20th Century Fox
"Hey. Heeeey. This is the song we had sex to. Remember? In my car. Heeeeeey. Can I come upstairs?"

In 10 Things I Hate About You, to get Julia Stiles, Heath Ledger sings "Can't Take My Eyes Off of You," orchestrated with the marching band, to woo her. Because nothing says "intimacy" like a bunch of 16-year-old clarinet players watching and judging you with their cold, clarinet-loving eyes.

Touchstone Pictures
He was originally supposed to serenade her with "Back That Azz Up," but they couldn't afford the rights.

#1. Interrupting a Wedding to Say You Love the Bride or Groom

Columbia Pictures

The most offensive thing celebrated in rom-coms is the "interrupting a wedding ceremony." I mean, it's the climax of a movie with everyone's favorite "Ew, that's creepy" relationship: The Graduate.

Even if I was in love with someone else and desperately wanted to be with him, I'd be like, "Hey, can you wait like a month and I'll get this annulled? We already paid for everything, so it's just easier."

United Artists
The crippling realization that you've just sat on hobo gum in a wedding dress.

This also happens at the end of the anti-Scottish travesty Made of Honor, where Patrick Dempsey, the ostensible inventor of the "coffee sleeve," finally realizes he's in love with his best friend and spends his whole time as "maid of honor" ridiculing Scottish culture and being the worst friend and human to the woman he supposedly loves. And after he interrupts her wedding and kisses her, he also tells her she looks terrible, because LOL she's wearing traditional Scottish stuff.

This dude needs a restraining order and to not be allowed to get married to the woman of his dreams.

Columbia Pictures
"You're selfish, clingy, and racist? Yes! Yes! A thousand times yes!"

The subcategory of this, of course, is "interrupting a wedding when neither you nor the person you love is the bride or groom."

Did you get that?

In Picture Perfect, when Jennifer Aniston finally tries to win back wedding videographer Jay Mohr while he is filming a wedding, the bride and groom are apparently very happy that the couple has patched things up. Where any sane person should think, "Hey, we're paying you to film the most magical day of OUR lives -- can you SHUT UP?"

Everyone's a jerk and everyone's terrible.

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Erin Mallory Long

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